All School
by Link and Luigi
Summary: Middle School, AU! All School, my dream! The merging of elementary school, to middle school and then to high school where all the kids connect and hang out together as one big mass of adolescents! It was always my dream to go the high school! COMPLETE
1. The Universal Bus Stop

Chopper Bust a Move!

Clad in a red t-shirt, shorts and a straw hat, Luffy walked with a skip in his step to the bus stop, swinging his red plastic lunchbox with a rooster on it.  He had on his blue backpack and when he reached the general vicinity of the bus stop, he caught sight of one of his very best friends; Zoro!

Zoro raised his hand in a courtesy wave to acknowledge that he recognized Luffy's existence.  He was wearing the same black shorts that were decorated with hundreds of huge pockets and his dark blue sleeveless shirt with the double zero on the front.  Of course, he was a cool eighth grader reaching the end of the year so he never bothered to even take off his headphones anymore.  They were a permanent accessory, hanging around his neck when class was in session, as well as the baseball hat that _never _came off and hung had a weird angle that not even his geometry teacher could figure out!!

"Hi Zoro!!" said Luffy as he stood up next to Zoro.

"Hi." Zoro answered, even though Luffy was only a dweeby little sixth grader.

"I have a BIG test today in math!!" Luffy exclaimed.

"Didn't you have that yesterday?" Zoro said with a raised eyebrow.

"Oh right!" said Luffy.  

It was then that Nami appeared, exchanged a quick hello with the other two and then began to hike up her skirt and pulled a pair of high heels out of her backpack and put her sneakers in it.  Then she removed her sweater and stuffed that in the bag as well and handed Zoro a small mirror.

"Hold this," she instructed.

Since he went through this every morning, it didn't offend him as much as it did the very first day. The only thing that DID bother him about it, though, was that she still continued to tell him to hold it even though she could very well just hand it to him and he would know that he had to hold it.  After all, it was June already.

Zoro and Luffy both knew very well that they weren't allowed to make a sound while Nami was applying her make-up so they waited patiently for her to finish and place it back in her bag.

"Today someone is going to ask me to the dance!" Nami declared.

"You've been saying that every day since Monday." Luffy said.  "It's Friday now and the dance is tonight.  No one has asked you."

"The end of the year school dance is a big deal!" Nami said.  "And I just know there are plenty of guys who want to go with me!  I mean, I can't just NOT go to the dance!  It's the _end of the year dance_!"

"Why can't you go without a date?" asked Zoro who was genuinely confused.

"You just don't understand!" sighed Nami.  "EVERYONE has to have a date!"

Just then, they heard a few squeaks and honks which told them all that Usopp was on his way.  He was wearing his white collared shirt with the red suspenders and socks that were pulled half way up his shins and ugly brown loafers.  His backpack was on wheels but also had straps so he could conveniently put it on his back if he needed to go down stairs.  At the present moment, he had it on his back with all the clips around his waist so it was more comfortable to carry and didn't put any stress on his poor, frail back.

"HEY GUYS!!!" he screamed at the top of his lungs as he ran up and had to catch his breath since he was so out of shape.  Then he stood up and struck a pose dramatically, smiling so wide that his metal braces made a glare in the sunlight.  "Today is the day I will get a date for the dance!"

"Oh Usopp, sixth graders don't NEED dates to the dance!" said Nami.  "Plus, who's going to want to go out on a date with _you_?"

"EVERYONE, once they see this!" Usopp said as he pulled out a red bowtie with white polka dots from his pocket and hooked it onto his shirt.  "Watch this MAD action!!"  Then he spun it and it whirled around in circles, making a whistling sound as it did so.

"THAT'S SO COOL!!!" yelled Luffy as he ran up to Usopp's tie and spun it a few more times for good measure.

"NO girl is gonna go out with you, ESPECIALLY if you're wearing that tie!!" Nami yelled as if the mere thought offended her.  Zoro laughed out loud at the stupidity of it all and was glad that he wasn't a lowly sixth grader anymore.  Nope, he was an eighth grader now, soon to be a freshman in high school at the start of the next school year.  This made him above everyone else.  He wasn't about to run around begging girls to go to the dance with him, he was going to wait for them to come to him…but then turn them down.

"NAMI!!" came a voice as Sanji came sliding in with a flower in his hand.  "I picked this flower for you!  Please go to the dance with me…"

"Sanji, if I've told you once, I've told you a THOUSAND times, I'll never _ever _go to any dance with you as long as I live!" Nami said, crossing her arms and turning around.  Sanji stood up with his head hung low, his bag hung over one shoulder.  Despite the hot weather, he was wearing his nice black pants with a plain brown short-sleeved shirt that said, 'Banana Republic' on the front.  He had his yellow sunglasses on the tip of his nose too, so he couldn't imagine how Nami could possibly turn him down.

"Nami, you were just complaining about how no one had asked you yet." Zoro said.  "But Sanji's been asking you every day."

"I want to go with someone _besides _Sanji!" Nami said.

"Even if no one asks you?" Sanji pleaded.

"I'd rather not go than go with you." Said Nami truthfully.

"But you would look so cool if you were going out with a guy who's a grade older than you are!" Sanji reminded her.  "And then next year when I'm in high school, I can come by and pick you up and you can show everyone that you have such a suave boyfriend who goes to high school!"

"I'd go out with any eighth grader _except _for you." Nami said.

Sanji sighed and pulled out a cigarette.  He lit it, much to everyone's dismay and disgust since they had just learned about the harmful effects of smoking in their D.A.R.E. teachings and were still young and pure in the middle school years.

It was then that Sanji caught a glimpse of Usopp's spinning tie and nearly spit out his cigarette.  "WHAT is that?" he demanded.

"It's Usopp's girl magnet." Zoro said with a laugh.

"I'm going to get a hundred dates with this baby!!" Usopp yelled as he spun it again.

"No one is going to go out with that tie." Sanji said, exhaling some smoke.

"I bet everyone I ask is going to want to go out with me!" Usopp said.

"Fine." Said Sanji.  "Get a girl to go out with you just by spinning that tie."

"I WILL!" Usopp said in a determined voice.

"Here comes the bus!!" Luffy cheered since he had probably been sitting there staring down the road waiting for it to come, like he does every other morning while small talk was exchanged.  "We're going to school!!  HURRAY!"

There had never been a more peculiar circle of friends; composed of a variety of ages and grades but most of all because all were from entirely different groups at school but managed to bond and have time for each other.  An idiot, a jock, a 7th grader, a dork and a prep all coinciding together and living together, even eating lunch together, in perfect harmony.

They got on the bus and that meant it was time to split up and take their seats.  Zoro went off to his seat in the back that is really only half the regular size of a bus seat and sat with all the other people that were 'his type'.  Usopp and Luffy jumped to the very front most seat where all the sixth graders sat and talked about Star Wars and The Matrix.  Nami sat towards the back where she and her female 7th grade friends talked about make-up and the cutest guys in school.  As for Sanji, he sat somewhere in the middle where all the girls from all the grades sat, swooning over his mere existence.

"Hey Zoro, I found a girl who would be perfect for you and doesn't have a date yet." Said an eighth grader who was not quite as cool as Zoro as he hung over the back of his seat since he was only sitting in the second to last seat.

"Huh?" Zoro said in his perplexed way.  "I thought you guys knew that I'm not going.  I never go to dances."

"But this'll be your last middle school dance!" said a seventh grader who was sitting next to the eighth grader and _wished _he was as cool as everyone else.  He was really only there to do all the dirty work and go in and distract the cashier as everyone else ran out of the store with a bag of chips.  Of course, that was only when Zoro wasn't present or else that kind of stuff wouldn't have gone down.

Zoro raised an eyebrow at the existence of the seventh grader.  "Who is this?" he asked.

"My little brother." The eighth grader replied.

"Right." Said Zoro.

"I'M going out with that girl over there!" said the eighth grader who was sitting in the other back seat across from Zoro.

"A seventh grader?!" gasped the entire back of the bus.

"She's HOT!" said the kid in the back.  "Besides, Zoro hangs out with seventh grade girls!"

"No I don't." said Zoro.

"Yeah you do!" he answered.

Zoro looked over at the mass of seventh grade girls.  "Oh wait." He said.  "I hang out with that one sometimes." He pointed at Nami.  "But that doesn't mean I…I don't know…go out with them… or seek them out for conversation."

Meanwhile, the seventh grade girls were talking about the dance as well.  "I STILL don't have a date." Nami sighed as all of her girlfriends complimented her on how pretty and wonderful she was but couldn't POSSIBLY fathom why no guy had asked her out…even though they most likely all had dates already.

"What about those guys you always eat lunch with?" asked one of them.

"Oh, you mean Zoro and Sanji, the eighth graders?" Nami made sure to mention.  "Sure, I'm good friends with them and they have _both _asked me to the dance numerous times but I turned them down."

"WHY?!" screamed all the girls at the top of their lungs.

"Zoro's just not my type," Nami continued.  "After he asked me out and to the dance, I told him that I just wanted to stay friends and he just wouldn't take no for an answer.  I mean, this morning he came up to me with a flower and begged me to go with him but I didn't want anything to ruin our friendship.  As for Sanji…"

"Sanji's going to the dance with me." Sighed one of the girls happily.

"What?" said another.  "Sanji said _I _was his one and only!"

"You're a liar!" claimed yet another.  "When I called Sanji's house and asked him, he told me that nothing would make him happier!"

"Well…Sanji apparently already has a date…" Nami said.  "Or three."

"Four." Said one of the more tentative girls of the group who originally wasn't going to say anything but had to put her two cents in.

Sanji didn't have only four dates, he was increasingly getting more and more as the time of the dance grew nearer and the swarms of girls grew larger.

"Why, of course I'll go to the dance with you." Said Sanji from atop his perch on the seat with the wheel on it.  He was leaning against the window with his arms on either side of the seat in a very suave fashion.  "Nothing would make me happier."

"I'm so happy!" said a girl as she returned to her seat to go and tell her friends.

"Sanji, you are so cool!" exclaimed a group of girls who had counted to three and then said that.

"Really?" Sanji said, playing with his Mr. Prince sunglasses, even though he knew very well that he was a lady's man.  The girls screamed with delight and fawned over his every word. 

"Sanji, I heard a boy asked you out the other day, is that true?" one girl asked as the entire group fell silent in anticipation for the great Sanji's answer.

"This is true." He replied.  "I said no of course."

All the girls sighed with relief.  "Was it Zoro?" asked a girl.  "You always eat lunch with him so he probably thought that there was something between you two."

"Come now, you all know well and good that Zoro is perfectly straight." Said Sanji.

"Sanji, you're so considerate for not starting bad rumors!" said another girl as she came close to fainting.

"Was it one of those sixth graders?" questioned a girl skeptically.  "I mean, I could see why they would _want _to ask you but why they thought they had any sort of chance is just beyond me."

"It was not one of them." Laughed Sanji.  "One of them has not quite grasped the concept of asking a girl out to a dance and the other is stuck on the fact that his spinning tie will get him a date."

"Spinning tie?" said one girl.

"Yes," Sanji said, simulating spinning a tie.  "Like that!  And it makes a whirring sound."

The crowd erupted with hysterical, though some of them might not have found it funny at all but just felt that since Sanji had said something mildly humorous, that meant it was time for laughing.

Speaking of Usopp, and especially his spinning tie, he and Luffy were sitting in the front seat giddy with excitement as the bus pulled closer into the middle school.  "I still have to find a date." Said Usopp as he scanned the area while Luffy continuously spun his tie.

"SPIN IT AGAIN!!!" Luffy cheered, clapping his hands.  The bus came to a stop to pick up more students.

Then she got on.  The sunlight behind her made her face glow as she spoke to a friend and laughed happily.  Usopp was entranced by her beauty and watched her closely as she walked by him and sat behind him.

"That's her!" Usopp whispered to Luffy.  "That's the girl I want to ask to go to the dance with me."

"Kaya?" Luffy said.

"Shh!" Usopp hushed him.  "Don't say it too loudly or she'll know!"

"Don't you want her to know?" Luffy asked, looking puzzled.  "If you don't talk to her, then she won't know you want to ask her to the dance."

Luffy then sat up on his knees and looked behind him at the beautiful Kaya who was talking to her friend.  "Hey Kaya!" she said.  "I'm Luffy!  My friend wants to ask you a question!"

With that, Usopp nervously poked his head up over the seat.

"H-h-h-hi…K-k-k-kaya!" Usopp stuttered.

"Don't talk to me!" Kaya said, looking distressed.  "Your nose frightens me and you never brush your hair and that is bothersome!"

"I just wanted to ask you if you wanted to go to the dance with me!" Usopp said quickly.

"Never!" Kaya answered.  "Why would I want to go to the dance with you?"

"Because if you do, I'll let you spin this all day long!" Usopp said as he sat up straight and spun the tie.  Kaya's friend looked on with shock and disgust as Kaya only gazed upon it in silence and wonder.

Then, suddenly, she began to laugh.  "Do it again!" she said happily.

"If you go to the dance with me!" Usopp said.

Kaya nodded excitedly.  "Yes, yes!" she answered.  "Show me again!"

Usopp then began to spin the tie as Kaya continued to laugh more happily than ever before.  But then the bus stopped and Usopp had to be the first one off so he jumped off his seat and ran out of the bus, followed quickly by Luffy.

"Thanks for helping me out, Luffy!" said Usopp.

"No problem!" said Luffy.

"Maybe you can get yourself a date if you borrow my tie." Usopp offered.

"No thanks!" Luffy replied.  "I don't need a date."  Then Kaya came off the bus and waved to Usopp and ran off to homeroom with her friend, giggling the whole way.

Then came the swarm of scantily clad girls of all ages, in the midst of them being Sanji.  "I'll see you tonight, ladies!" Sanji called to them, blowing a kiss just as Nami and her friends got off the bus.

"Later!" Nami said as her friends all left and she waited with the other three for Zoro to come off the bus.  Of course, he had to be the last one so they patiently waited for everyone else to get off since they had gone through this process every day for the whole year.

When Zoro finally got off, they all looked at each other and began to walk as their big multi-grade posse to go their individual homerooms.  They dropped Luffy and Usopp off first, then Nami and then Zoro and Sanji walked off to their own homeroom.


	2. Hardcover and Paperback Yearbooks

"There will be an extended homeroom session this morning for the distribution of report cards." Said the teacher as he began to pass out slips of paper.

"You know, they pass out report cards on the same day as the dance JUST so parents can ground their kid for getting bad grades!" Sanji said to Zoro as a piece of paper with his name and grades fluttered down in front of him.  Without even looking at it, he turned it over.

"Maybe." Said Zoro as he took his paper from the teacher and looked at his grades.

"Well?" Sanji asked.  "How'd you do?"

"I got four A's total." Zoro responded.

"What classes?" Sanji continued.

"Let's see…" Zoro started slowly.  "Gym first quarter, gym second quarter, gym third quarter and gym forth quarter."

Sanji didn't say anything for a minute.  "How'd you do academically?"

"The usual…but I went up in math." Zoro commented as Sanji took the paper out of his hand.

"Yeah, you got a C- this quarter which brings your math average to about a D+." Sanji said, shaking his head slightly.  "With a comment that says, 'Test scores better'.  Your highest grade on here is a B+."

"No, I got four A's." Zoro said.

"I meant BESIDES gym." Sanji answered, rolling his eyes.

"Well, how'd you do?" Zoro asked even though he probably didn't really care.

"Let's see," Sanji said, handing Zoro his report card back and then turning his over and looking it up and down a few times.  "Well…I didn't go DOWN in anything… mostly B's, a few A's and one C+."

"Well that's good." Said Zoro with a shrug.

Meanwhile, Nami was looking over her report card in her homeroom.  All of her seventh grade friends were complaining over their D's and C's as she quietly hid her paper decorated with many A's and the occasional B in her backpack since it was, at that point, un-cool to get good grades.

And, considering Nami was pretending the whole time that she just didn't want to show her report card because her grades were so terrible, we're going to move on since that's not so interesting.

Usopp and Luffy were comparing their report cards off in their sixth grade homeroom.

"All right!!" Luffy exclaimed excitedly.  "I got all P's this quarter!!  Not a single F!"

"And I got all A's!!" Usopp declared.  "Except…in gym…"

"I got a P in gym!" Luffy said, not able to get over his entirely 'P' report card based on the Pass/Fail system since Luffy is special that way.

"This is a great day!" said Usopp happily.  "Not only did I get a date but I got this awesome report card that I can show her with joy and pride!!"

Luffy paused.  "I got ALLLL P's!!" he said again.

Then Luffy and Usopp decided that a party was in order.  So they threw one, getting only a few odd stares from the other kids in the class who then averted their eyes, feeling embarrassed just watching them.

A little while later, after everyone had been able to fully take in their grades for the year, the bell rang and Usopp and Luffy put on their ten thousand pound backpacks and sprinted down the hallway over the speed limit so they could get to class on time.

"Thank you for the P!!!" Luffy said to his history teacher who shall not reply or speak or acknowledge or be acknowledged anymore.  Now, since it was the end of the year, Luffy and Usopp took their seats just as a minute of passing time went by.  The two sat in the empty room quietly and silently, getting out their pencils and lining up their erasers up nicely on their desk and taking out their homework from last night.  Well, actually, Usopp was the only one doing this.  Luffy was like… eating his snack that he still gets even though you're not really supposed to get one in middle school.  Then he started singing some horrible song in an extremely tone deaf voice quite loudly so that the whole class could hear him, even that girl who was going to muster up the courage to ask him to the dance at the end of the class but decided against it after hearing Luffy serenade them.

When the second bell rang, class began.

Luffy was able to sit still for about five minutes, a big improvement from his previous fifteen seconds when he had first started school.  But after that five minutes was up, he leaned over to Usopp.

"Hey Usopp!!" he whispered in a voice that was loud enough for everyone to hear but they were all used to it so they had grown to learn how to ignore him.

"What?" Usopp replied quietly.

"Can I see your tie again?" he answered.

"Do you want to just borrow it?" Usopp asked.

"No, I just want to spin it." He replied, in a full speaking voice now as he leaned over even further and spun it contently as Usopp just kind of sat there awkwardly trying to pay attention but kind of was restricted.

Meanwhile, in a hallway far away off in the eighth grade wing where sixth graders dare not even go to the bathroom, there was a pleasant little math class.

"So what would you call an angle when you put it inside a box?" the teacher asked as she drew an angle and enclosed it in a box.

The class was truly stumped.

"An acute angle?" said one random kid.

"No…" said the teacher.  "You call it…an angle in a box!"  There was silence and then the class shared a good chuckle.  Then there were two kids who found it ridiculously funny and laughed for a few more minutes.  Then one of those kids thought it was still funny and continued to laugh, and the other kid continued to laugh as well just because he thought it was hilarious that the first kid was still laughing at something so stupid.

Of course, there was one student who had never even laughed in the first place.  In fact, he had slept right through the entire joke.  Sanji leaned over and prodded Zoro with his pencil so he raised his head off the desk.

"What?" Zoro said.

"You just missed a joke." Said Sanji even though he wasn't one of the two kids who were STILL laughing.  As a matter of fact, he really only had gone, 'Heh' and then considered it for a minute and dismissed it as an entertaining momentary distraction.

"Oh no." said Zoro as he lied his head back down on the desk.

"And you wonder why you got a D in math?!" Sanji said as if it offended him.

"C-." Zoro said.

"Shh!" said Nami as she turned around since she was sitting in front of Sanji, who was sitting next to Zoro.  "In case you haven't noticed, the class has gotten over the angle in a box and we're now continuing!"

"It's not like it matters, we already got our report cards." Zoro said.

"He's right." Said Sanji.  "All that's left to do is yearbooks for Monday."

"I thought we were getting them today." Said Zoro.

"We are." Said Nami with an exasperated sigh.  "But we're not going to do formal signing until Monday."

"It seems kind of ludicrous to have to come back to school after the weekend just to sign yearbooks." Sanji said.

Then the teacher cleared her throat and Nami spun back around.  "I was going to hand out yearbooks at the end of the class but I figure since you're all eager and talking about them anyway, I'll just hand them out now." Said the math teacher as everyone cheered and she went and retrieved a big box, putting it on the table.

First, she pulled out a bunch of shiny, hard-covered books that were all pretty and nice and bound.  After getting all twenty of them out of the box, she pulled out a paperback one that had the cover folded back from being sloppily tossed inside and underneath all other books.  She passed out the pretty hardcover ones to all the eighth grade students and then handed the paperback one to Nami.

"I hate how the 8th graders get better yearbooks." Complained Nami, dropping hers on her desk.

"Well, if you had been in your regular math class then yours wouldn't have gotten folded." Zoro said.

"No, Nami wanted to come into the same math class as _me_!" Sanji said as he pulled out his pen with purple ink.  "Do you want me to sign your yearbook, Nami?"

  At first, Nami was going to immediately decline but then she figured that it would be a nice thing to show off to her friends that she had gotten the eighth grade heart throb to write a very loving message to her in her book.  She would hand her yearbook to her friend to sign it, her friend would open it and see Sanji's signature and exclaim, "You got Sanji to sign your yearbook?!"  And then she would vaguely look over and say, "Oh right…he insisted…"

"Fine, but don't take up a whole page…" she said as she surrendered her yearbook to him.

Sanji had been practicing his signature all week long building up to this moment.

Dearest Nami,

          My love for you burns like a thousand suns!  I wish only the best for you and wish to offer words of comfort for next year when I will no long be attending this school.  I'll see you at the dance tonight, and we'll party like it's 1999 all over again!

                                                          Sanji

Nami didn't even bother to read it, just slammed the cover shut and turned around.  Sanji and Zoro then exchanged their hardcover yearbooks for signing.  Zoro flipped to the page with his picture on it and simply wrote, "Good year, --Zoro." across his own face.

Sanji, pumped with his purple pen of doom, wrote a note right at the front of the book so that _his _signature would be the first that people see.

Zoro,

          This year was interesting, and I'm glad we got to be friends and spent time together even though our out-of-school schedules were so different.  Have a good summer, and I'll see you in high school!

                                                                   Sanji

Of course, Sanji went through some slight shock when he flipped to the front and back pages of his own yearbook to find that Zoro had not written anything but then he checked Zoro's picture to find it there.  "Don't you have anything else to say?" Sanji said, sounding perturbed.

"Uh…no." Zoro answered.

Their conversation didn't continue, though, because the various girls in the class bombarded Sanji, begging him to sign their yearbooks.

Passing time occurred as scheduled and students moved from their classes to the next ones.  Luffy and Usopp shared a science class as well and entered where Luffy promptly thanked the teacher for the 'P' he had received and then took his seat.

The teacher handed out pieces of colored construction paper stapled together to the students.  On the small, makeshift books, the children's school pictures were attached with double sided tape and the word 'Yearbook' was scrawled across the top with black Sharpie.

"WE GET YEARBOOKS?!" Luffy screamed, looking at his.  "THIS IS SO COOL!  WOW!!  AMAZING!!!"

Usopp, meanwhile, was only staring at the book in disbelief.  "This is not a yearbook." He said.

"What do you mean?" said Luffy, holding up his yearbook.  "It says 'Yearbook' right on the front as clear as day!!"

"That's only to throw you off!" said Usopp as if it really mattered as much as he was making it out to.  "They just want to distract us with this book so that we won't rebel and demand a real one!"

"GASP!!!" yelled Luffy.

"You know what we have to do, right Luffy?" Usopp said.

"YEAH!!" said Luffy.  "They can't get away with this!!"

"We have to go down to the office and complain!!" Usopp declared.

"NO!!" Luffy said.  "WE MUST STEAL THE EIGHTH GRADER YEARBOOKS!!"

"All right, that too." Said Usopp with a shrug.  "As long as I get a REAL yearbook.  But you'll be doing all the stealing."

"YEAH!!!" yelled Luffy as he jumped up and punched the air.

Just then, Kaya and a few of her friends came running up giggling.  "Um… Usopp?" she said nervously as her friends pushed her forward.  "Will you sign my yearbook please?"

"I will only when your lovely hands hold an eighth grade yearbook!" Usopp announced.  "I, the Great Usopp, am going to take some hardcover eighth grade yearbooks from the office and end these sixth grade injustices here and now!!  Would you like one as well?"

"Wow, Usopp!" said Kaya excitedly.  "That's amazing!  You're so brave and your tie is so spinny."

"Would you like to spin it?" Usopp asked, leaning over.

"WOULD I?!" Kaya said as she spun the tie and laughed happily.

"CAN I SPIN IT TOO?!" Luffy yelled.

"NO!" Usopp said, turning around.  "There's not a moment to lose!  We must go and retrieve the yearbooks now!"

Of course, they waited for passing time so it wouldn't look like they were skipping class.  Which they WEREN'T but no sixth graders would even dream of being caught in the halls without a hall pass.

Slowly but surely, the day passed all the way to lunchtime.  Nami continued her quest for a date to the dance but remained unsuccessful.  Luffy and Usopp eventually chickened out of their mission to get the yearbooks because a sixth grader would NEVER steal from the school.  Sanji continued to try to get Nami to date him, but in the process only got more and more dates to the dance but it's not like that bothered him or meant anything to him.  As for Zoro, today was just like any other and now it was time for lunch and he was EXTRA hungry today.

"I can't just NOT go to the dance!" Nami whined as she got up in line with Zoro and cut the kid that was behind him.  But it's not like she cared because the kid was ONLY a sixth grader.  "No one has asked me yet and I'm getting desperate!  I mean, at this point, I think even if a sixth grader asked me, I'd go with him, as long as he was taller than me!  Even if YOU asked me, Zoro, I would go!  I mean, after all, we are friends and another friend should know when his friend is in need!  But that's just speaking hypothetically!"

"I'm not even going to the dance." Zoro said.

"Oh I know THAT." Said Nami.  "But think about it!  It's going to be your last dance as a middle schooler and then you're going to go to high school and be at the bottom of the totem pole again!  No one's going to want to go with you!"

"I won't even go anyway." Said Zoro.  "So that's a good thing."

"But I STILL think you should go!" Nami continued.  "It'll be fun!  And maybe you can give me a ride there and do the gentlemanly thing and walk me in!  Of course, since you're there already, you might as well stay and hang out with me since you might as well and everything!"

"Can't you get there some other way?" Zoro asked.

"Listen you, you're taking me to that dance whether you like it or not!!" Nami said forcefully as she grabbed Zoro's collar.

Zoro pushed her away.  "Just go with Sanji!" he said.  "He WANTS to go with you!"

Just then, Sanji came over and cut in front of the kid that was now behind Nami.  But that sixth grader didn't dare say anything about it because Sanji was an EIGHTH grader and by this time, sixth graders should know their place and not step out of line.

"NAMI!" he exclaimed.  "PLEASE go to the dance with me!  Have you changed your mind since math?"

"No!" Nami said angrily.  "I will NEVER go to the dance with you no matter how many times you ask me!  And if you ask me again then I don't know what I'll do in my uncontrollable rage!" Then she latched arms with Zoro.  "Besides, Zoro has already asked me."

Sanji looked at Zoro with wide eyes.  "Is this true?" he said in THAT TONE.

"No!" Zoro said, wrenching himself free of Nami's grasp.

"Good, because otherwise I would have had to start some horrible rumors about you." Sanji threatened.

Then they got to the front of the line, Zoro searched his pockets for his lunch money.  "Oh man, I just remembered that I forgot my lunch money…" Zoro said.

"Too bad, Zoro, looks like you're just going to have to put it all back." Nami said with a shrug.  "The lunch ladies aren't allowing borrowing anymore because it's the end of the year!  However…I believe _I _could loan you some lunch money!"

"Really?" Zoro said.  "That's great!  Thanks."  Nami gave him some lunch money and he paid the lunch lady and went back to his seat.  Nami and Sanji followed as well after THEY had paid and then went back to the table as well.  At the table was Luffy and Usopp who had their lunchboxes all opened up and their napkins in their laps.

Only six were allowed to a table so Nami sat at the end, Sanji across from her, Zoro next to him with his feet up on the chair across from his seat.  Usopp and Luffy sat at the other end across from each other.  So all the chairs were taken.

"So anyway, Zoro, about my payment." Nami said to Zoro.

"Huh?" he said.

"I loaned you lunch money and you have to pay me back." Nami explained.

"Yeah, I will." Zoro said.  "I don't have the money right now or else I would have paid for it by myself though."

"No, you don't have to pay me back in MONEY!" laughed Nami as if he was a fool for assuming that.

"Oh…" he said, thinking.  "Well…what DO you want then?"

"I thought you'd never ask!" Nami said.  "Sure, I'd LOVE to go to the dance with you, Zoro!!"

"WHAT?!" yelled Sanji AND Zoro as they both sprung up out of their seats and slammed their hands down on the table.

"You can't make me go to the dance with you just because you paid for my lunch!" Zoro said as he sat back down.

"What he said!" said Sanji.

Nami covered her face and erupted with fake tears.  "Oh Zoro!" she cried.  "If only you understood how important this dance was to me!  Even after I was nice enough to loan you money, this is how you repay me!"

"Just go with Sanji—" Zoro started.

Nami began to wail, but no one knew it was fake!!

"FINE!" Zoro yelled over her wails because he's a sucker for girl's tears.  "But don't read anymore into this!  I'm only doing it because you're FORCING me too!"

"Oh good!" said Nami as she immediately stopped crying and picked her tray up off the table.  "I'm just going to have to go tell everyone now!  Bye!"

Then she ran off.

"How COULD you, Zoro?!" yelled Sanji.  "You KNOW how I feel about Nami!  And you just go and steal her while I'm sitting right here!  I didn't think you could sink so low!!  For SHAME!!"

"You saw!" said Zoro.  "She FORCED me to!"

"Well she could have forced me." Sanji said, crossing his arms.

"You're right, she could have." Zoro said, rolling his eyes.

"Now I'm going to the dance all alone!!" whined Sanji.  Just as he said that, a few eighth grade girls came running up to him.

"Um…Sanji?" said one of them.  "If you're going to the dance alone, could you go with me?  I didn't ask because I figured that you were already taken…"

"Of course!" said Sanji.  "Nothing would make me happier!"

"Great!" said the girl.  "I'll see you there then!"  She and her friends ran off giggling happily.

"Isn't that your…I don't know…tenth date?" Zoro said.

"That's entirely besides the point!" said Sanji.

"No, that IS the point." Zoro pointed out.

"See you later guys, we don't want to be late!" said Usopp as he and Luffy grabbed their wheely backpacks and ran out of the lunch room as fast as they could.

"The bell's not going to ring for another seven minutes." Said Sanji, looking at his tiny little watch that had a thin little brown band.  "And we don't have to be in class for another twelve minutes."

"And you might as well just round that off to fifteen." Said Zoro.

"No, because then you'd be late." Sanji said.

"Only by three minutes." Zoro said with a shrug.

"I will never leave lunch before the first bell but I would never show up late to a class either." Sanji declared.  "Especially not for home economics."

"In that case, we might as well round fifteen up to twenty." Zoro said.

"I LOVE home economics!" said Sanji.

"I know." Said Zoro.

Even though both of them left the lunchroom at the same time, Sanji entered the home economics room with time to spare and Zoro showed up a few minutes late because he needed a drink, get his book, put the book away, visit the library, talk to a teacher, exchange dialogue with his peers, go to the bathroom and fetch his knitting needles from his locker.  When he was within a few feet of the door, he decided to go on strike and put the knitting needles back in his locker and THEN go to class.

And that's exactly what…he did.


	3. Middle School Day Fun

"Today, instead of having the usual split class of knitting and cooking, we're all just going to cook today." Announced the teacher.

"But this is practically the last day of school!" yelled some rebellious kid.  "Can't we just mingle or something?!"

"NO!!" yelled the passionate home economics teacher.  "YOU MUST ALL BAKE CAKES!!!"

Conveniently enough, the teacher declared that there would be five kids per table.  And since everyone ALSO conveniently enough had home economics at the exact same time, they all went to one table.

"I love baking cakes!" Sanji said as he fished around in the drawer under the table for his favorite apron.  "And I love frosting them even more!"

"Zoro, some of my friends don't believe me that I'm going with an eighth grader so you BETTER show up!!" Nami whispered to Zoro.

"I'm not going to break my promise…" said Zoro as if such a thought offended him.  He searched for the least feminine apron in the drawer and even though the orange Home Depot one was by far the most manly, he had a flashback to the day when he first entered this classroom and put it on.  People then made fun of him because he looked like a carrot with his green hair since his teacher FORCED him to take his hat off while cooking.

"Do I want the salmon colored one, the periwinkle one, the mauve one, the Home Depot one or the lavender one?" asked Usopp as he pulled the aprons out of the drawer.

"_I_ have the salmon colored one!" said Sanji as he tied the bow in the back perfectly.

"I'll take periwinkle today." Said Zoro before someone else could claim the bluest one with no frills like the lavender one or say 'Kiss the Cook' like the mauve one.  But most importantly of all, it didn't make him look like a carrot.

Luffy ended up with the Home Depot one and then Usopp took the lavender one so Nami was left with the mauve one with 'Kiss the Cook' written on the front.

"Nami!" said Sanji.  "I have to kiss the cook!  We're both cooks so it'll be a cookly exchange."

"Let's just get to baking our cake." Said Nami, ignoring Sanji.

"Ah, cake!" said Sanji since we're not quite sure which he loves more; cooking or Nami.

"There's only one upside to being in Sanji's group." Nami sighed.  "Easy A."

"I got a C in this class." Said Zoro.

"How did that happen?" gasped Usopp since a C was unheard of.

"Effort, or lack thereof." Zoro explained.

"All right!" said Sanji.  "We're going to make the best cake ever!  Zoro, you preheat the oven.  Nami, you butter the pan!  Usopp, you set the timer for 18 minutes but don't start it yet!  Luffy, you have the most important job of all!  You make sure everyone else is doing it right.  As for me, I'll handle the rest!"

"There you have it." Said Nami.

Just then, the teacher walked over as Sanji started to get out all the necessary ingredients.  "Zoro, I don't see you putting in any effort!!" she yelled.

"Why does it matter?" Zoro asked.  "We already got our report cards."

"I hope you don't expect to excel in high school with this sort of attitude!" scolded the teacher as she walked away in a huff.

"Why is _everything _about high school?" Zoro sighed to the others after she had left.

"It IS next year." Said Sanji as he cracked some eggs and dumped in some flour that he had previously measured out perfectly.

"Not for me!" said Usopp as he tried to set the timer exactly to eighteen minutes without messing up or else he might not get another task.

"Me neither." Said Nami.  "We're going to be split up when the school year ends."

"It'll be strange at first for you to be away from me, won't it Nami?" Sanji said, nudging Nami.

"No, actually, it'll be quite nice." Nami said, sounding annoyed.

"Do you guys remember when we FIRST met and became friends?" Luffy said, beginning to reminisce.

"Yeah, it was because of you." Zoro said to Luffy in a half, 'hurray!' tone and a half, 'this is all your fault' tone.  "When you came in November partway through the year."

"Uh-huh!" said Luffy.  "I was walking by your classroom and wanted to know WHY you were in class after school had ended!"

"It's CALLED detention!" Zoro yelled since he had probably told Luffy about a trillion times so him calling it a class got to the point in which it offended him.

"Then I busted you out!" Luffy continued.

"Yeah, and got me ANOTHER detention." Zoro reminded him.

"Even though you did nothing to deserve the detention in the first place!" Luffy said, crossing his arms.  "I mean, just because you protected a sixth grader from an eighth grader who was beating up on her and that particular eighth grader just so happened to be the principal's son, you got a month's worth of detentions!!"

"I could have held them out." Zoro said.  "It was no big deal."

"But then they were going to suspend you!" Luffy said.  "Even after you had gone through all those detentions, just to prove something to the rest of the students!!"

"I could have held that out too." Zoro insisted.

"Ever since then, we've been the best of friends!" Luffy said.

"Please don't say it like that." Zoro said, hoping no one had heard that.

"But it's not like the rest of you aren't my best friends either." Luffy said, turning to everyone else.  "I remember when I met YOU, Nami!"

"Uh…" Nami said, trying to remember.

"There was a kid who was stealing your lunch money every day!" Luffy explained.  "So you started bringing in two sets of money!  But then I came along and taught him a lesson!"

"But why would I hang around with you after that?" Nami wondered to herself.  "As a thanks, I guess?"

"No!" laughed Luffy.  "It was because I hung around with Zoro and he's an eighth grader and you wanted to up your social status!"

"Ah yes." Nami nodded.  "And it worked."

"And then there's Usopp!" Luffy said, pointing to Usopp who was waiting for his story to be told.  "I was walking home from school one day because I had missed the bus and I saw Usopp being beat up by some guy and then he was tossed in the dumpster!!  So I helped him out of the dumpster, taught that man a lesson and ever since then, we've been friends!  Plus, we're in all each other's classes."

"I don't think you remember correctly, Luffy," said Usopp.  "I was beating that man and then I jumped into the dumpster and you simply helped me climb out."

"Uh…I guess I DON'T remember correctly…" Luffy said, utterly confused.  "Because I don't think it happened like THAT…"

"It did!!" Usopp commanded.

"All right, whatever!" said Luffy with a shrug.  "As for Sanji…"

"I don't want to hear anymore…" complained Zoro as if one more story would kill him.

"Hey, we all waited patiently through YOUR story." Said Sanji as he hit Zoro on the head with one of the wooden spoons since he was STILL cooking.

"We all were outside playing one day when we passed by that private school of yours, Sanji!" Luffy started.

"Right, Baratie." Sanji said.  "That private school sucked."

"And you were standing on the other side of the fence and you asked us if we went to the high school!" Luffy said.  "And we told you we were only in middle school but we would be going there eventually!  And then you launched into a huge explanation of 'All School'!!"

"Yes, All School, my dream!" Sanji said.  "The merging of elementary school, to middle school and then to high school where all the kids connect and hang out together as one big mass of adolescents!  It was always my dream to go to the high school but Baratie went from kindergarten to twelfth grade so I never thought it was possible.  The only children I ever saw were in my school!  There were no children from varying elementary schools or middle schools—"

"Hey, I'M telling the story!" Luffy said.  "But…he pretty much told the whole thing.  But we all worked together to beat up a bunch of people in the school in order to get Sanji expelled from Baratie which FORCED him to be enrolled into the public school system!"

"And I've never been happier." Sanji concluded.  Then he looked down.  "Hey, the batter's all ready!  Into the oven it goes!"  He opened the preheated oven and put it inside.

"While you're waiting for your cake to cook, you may all knit even though I said there would be no knitting today." Said the teacher.

"All right!" said Sanji as he whipped out his knitting needles and an almost finished sweater and began knitting furiously.

"Oh darn, I left my knitting needles at home." Said Zoro, snapping his fingers.

"You can use mine, Zoro!" said some random kid who was standing at a table close to Zoro's.  "I broke my finger so I wouldn't be able to knit even if I WANTED to!  And I don't."

"That's nice of you!" said the teacher as she forced Zoro to take the needles and start knitting.

"I don't wanna knit anymore!" complained Luffy as he struggled with the same stitch he had been working with all year.

Eighteen minutes later, the timer dinged.  Sanji gasped and almost dropped his knitting.  He put his oven mitts on and opened the oven door.  Then, ever so professionally and carefully, he removed the pan from the oven and set it on the table to cool.

"Ahh, smells delicious!" Sanji said as he basked in his glory that is cake.  "All that's left to do now is frost it!"  Then Sanji began making frosting with horseshoe eyes.

"You should follow the example that Sanji leads!" said the teacher.  "Sanji, you are my PRIZE student!  Never have I had another student who was as good at home economics as you, especially a BOY!"

"I just try so hard!" said Sanji as he came very close to getting a tear in his eye.

When the cakes were made and properly frosted, it was taste-testing time!  Everyone pretty much discarded their cakes and made a jump for the Sanji group cake since EVERYONE knows that Sanji makes cakes that are by far the best and just have a certain sparkle in them.  In fact, it was like a party in your mouth every time you'd take a bite.  And sometimes, the teacher would get so happy that she would faint and that meant that everyone got to leave class early.  And today was one of those days!

But it's not like they had much time to do something.  In fact, the bell rang just as they gathered up all their stuff to leave.

"WE'RE GOING TO BE LATE!!!" screamed all the sixth graders in the class as they ran out of the room in a cloud of dust and flying paper.  Everyone else took their time and strolled to their next class.

Since this is some kind of freak middle school, our five main characters, despite being in different grades, all had another class together; DRAMA!!

"All right, for our last scene for the year is going to be a fun one!" said the Drama teacher as she shook a hat with pieces of paper around.  "In this scene, there is going to be a mother, a father, a neighbor, a son and a friend.  Each group member will pick the part out of this hat and then the class shall give them a situation that the five characters have to act out!  Which group would like to go first?"

After a minute of waiting, no one raised their hands so the teacher pulled out her class list and looked randomly at the sheet.  "Zoro!" she said.

"Why is it always me?" complained Zoro.

"Because your name begins with a Z and it's easy to pick out of a list." The teacher said.  "Now show me that you earned that B!!"

Everyone knew that in Drama, there are only two grades; A or B.  So that means if you did well, you'd get an A.  If you did badly, you'd get a B.  But it's not like it was a secret to everyone that Zoro didn't particularly enjoy or excel in drama class.

So Zoro's group, which you can assume was Luffy, Usopp, Nami and Sanji, took their place on the stage and individually took their pieces of paper out of the hat.

"Why did I have to get the only female-specific role?" Zoro said as he crumpled the paper and gave it a good throw.

"I'm the son!" said Usopp as if that was the part he dreamed about every night.

"And I'm the friend!!" Luffy said as he grabbed Usopp's hands and they danced in circles.

"And I'm…the father." Sanji sighed.  "But there's no way I would be married to Zoro.  Perhaps I'm the father to the friend or the neighbor."

"I'm the neighbor." Said Nami with a shrug.  "Whatever."

"And what will the situation be?" asked the teacher as she pointed at a random kid who was ALSO in the drama class.

"YOU'RE ALL PIRATES!!!" screamed the kid at the top of his lungs so the world shook and got knocked even further off its axis.

"It has to be more specific than that." Said the teacher.

"Okay…the son and the friend was just caught buying drugs from the neighbor by the mother!" started the kid.  "Then the father punishes his son!!"  Then he paused.  "On a pirate ship!"

"Well…all right!" said the teacher.  "Start!"

The five looked at each other for a minute before Usopp took the initiative.  "Come on, friend, let's go buy drugs from my neighbor!" he said.

"Hasn't the D.A.R.E. officer taught you anything?!" demanded Luffy.

"Nope!" said Usopp.  "Let's go buy some from my neighbor."  Then Usopp stood and waited for Nami to offer him some drugs.  "Uh…buy some drugs from my neighbor…who is right there…"

"Oh right." Said Nami, holding out her hands.  "Here's some drugs.  Don't smoke them all in one place."

"Thanks." Said Usopp.

"Usopp, this is WRONG!" said Luffy.  "And you should know better than to sell drugs to Usopp, Nami."

"Well, now that I have my drugs, I hope I don't get caught." Usopp continued as he waited for Zoro to catch him.  "Especially by my mother because I know just how upset she would be if she found out that I was buying drugs from my neighbor right now."

They all waited as Zoro stood there with his arms crossed as if he wasn't supposed to be doing anything.

"Usopp, I think I might just very well tell your mother." Said Luffy.

Then Sanji nudged Zoro.  Zoro looked at Sanji irritably with the face that said, 'WHY did you do that?!  What did I ever do to you?!  What right do YOU have to touch me?!'

"All right…I think this scene is dead…" said the teacher.

"Hey, I'm supposed to punish Usopp!" said Sanji.

"And I still have to catch him." Zoro added.  If given the opportunity, a lot of people would have slapped Zoro right then and there for being a dimwit, but no one dared doing so.

The next class on the list was Zoro's favorite; GYM!  But it's not like he had a favorite class.  It was more so…the class he hated the least.

And this was ALSO the last class of the day!  AND THEY ALL HAD IT TOGETHER!!!  YAY!!

In the locker room, Luffy and Usopp both changed in the bathroom where their sixth grade flesh would not be revealed to all the other boys in the world.  Of course, other sixth graders and even a few seventh graders waited in line as well as all the eighth grades and most seventh graders walked around without shirts on while looking for their gym clothes.

Zoro had the typical long, bright yellow basketball shorts with a white t-shirt with a sweatband and wristbands.  Sanji was wearing a white sweatshirt with a hood on it as well as black sweatpants.  Usopp had his Harry Potter sweat suit on while Luffy was wearing the exact same thing he always wears.  He didn't even change.  He just threw himself a party in a bathroom stall because he just didn't know WHAT other kids were doing in there, but he didn't want to be left out of the loop by not occupying a bathroom stall for approximately two and half minutes.

And of course, in the girl's locker room, Nami had on her tight, pink spaghetti strapped shirt with shorts that were so short that she could have gotten away with wearing them as undies.

"KICKBALL!!!" screamed the gym teacher whose name is Mr. Gym but it's not like that matters since he's going away soon.  "It's time for everyone's favorite part of gym and that is picking teams!!  Our captains for today will be…"—he scanned the group of children—"Random Kid #1 and Luffy!"

"I'M A CAPTAIN?!" Luffy gasped dramatically.  "WOW!!!  I pick Zoro and Sanji and Usopp and Nami…"

"No, only one at a time." Said Mr. Gym.

"Fine!" said Luffy.  "Then I pick Zoro!!"

So Zoro was on Luffy's team.  Next, Luffy picked Sanji.  Then he picked Nami and then Usopp.  After that, he just picked whoever was on the far left since he didn't really care as long as he had his best friends!!

"Okay, Luffy's team kicks first!" said Mr. Gym as he ran off to go to the bathroom.

"Hey guys, even though in the past, it may have seemed that I'm not that good at gym, I'm actually really good at this game." Said Sanji.  All the athletic boys in the class glared at him.  To them, he was home economics boy.  The STAR home economics boy.  And while he was very popular and cool, he was NOT good athletic which meant he was not good at gym.

"Then you can go first!" Luffy declared.  "I get to decide since I'm the captain!"

The rest of the kids on the team figured that that was best because then he wouldn't be able to mess it up for them LATER.

So Sanji went up first and kicked the ball into next week.  He kicked it so hard that it got lodged in the wall.  Everyone cheered as Sanji ran to first base but then stopped.

"KEEP GOING!!!" yelled everyone as the entire OTHER team started banging on the wall in attempt to get the ball out.

"No, no." said Sanji.  "It was daring enough for me to get this far."

After a few minutes, the kids finally tied a bunch of floor hockey sticks together and then pried the ball out of the wall.  Sanji was STILL on first base, much to everyone's dismay.  But they were all happy again when Zoro walked up to the plate.

He gave it an athletic soccer kick and booted it pretty far into the outfield.  Of course, the whole OTHER team had moved back so he probably would have gotten all the way around the bases if he had just bunted it but there was no way he was going to do THAT.  Plus, he wouldn't have gone all the way around the bases anyway because Sanji was on second base and there wasn't any way he was going to move as the kids scrambled for the ball.

"Go to third!!" yelled Zoro.

"No, no." said Sanji.  "It was daring enough for me to get this far."

Luffy insisted on going next as all the boys started crying because they were going to lose kickball in gym in middle school, which was a big deal.  Luffy kicked the ball pretty well, though, not as good as Zoro and CERTAINLY not as good as Sanji but was stopped at first base because Zoro was on second base and Sanji was on third.

"No, no." said Sanji.  "It was daring enough for me to get this far."

"I didn't yell at you yet." Said Zoro.

"But you were GOING to." Sanji pointed out.

Luffy's last words before he had kicked the ball were to let Usopp go next.  So Usopp was next and he kicked it so it went straight up into the air.  The catcher stepped forward and caught it as Sanji came frolicking to home plate, unaware of the tagging up rule.

So he was tagged out.  Luffy was also unaware of the tagging up rule so he attempted to push Zoro off second base.  "Go, Zoro!!" he yelled.

"No YOU have to go back to first!" Zoro said as he tried to push Luffy back to first.  Then Luffy was tagged out as well and, since Zoro had been pushing Luffy back to first, he was off base as well so HE was tagged out.  Making it a total of FOUR OUTS!

After gym, Zoro was still angry with his defeat as he changed back into his regular clothes.  Everyone else couldn't really care less but they weren't Zoro.  Zoro had never gotten an 'out' before.

And now, it was time to go home where all the tykes would be bombarded by the weekend!!  And Friday afternoons called for many Friday afternoon activities that each child had to perform before actually going to the dance.  Zoro had his soccer practices and fencing lessons.  Sanji had to go home and bake another cake since he loves it so, and then he had to go to karate.  Nami went over to her friends house so her entire group of friends could get all pretty for the dance and so she could tell them (again) that a popular eighth grade rebel had asked her out!!  Usopp rehearsed what he would say to Kaya all night long and then made some Kool-Aid and found another bug for his bug collection that he hides under his bed.  As for Luffy, he spent the afternoon playing video games with Ace.  Ace creamed his ass every time, but there would be someday when Luffy would be big enough and smart enough to compete!  Maybe when he was in high school too…


	4. Finally! The Dance!

The dance was at six o'clock and ended at nine.  And Luffy was at the school at exactly six o'clock, the minute the music started, dressed in the exact same thing he had worn to school.  He grabbed a balloon and jumped around with it, in search of his friends.

"YAHOO!!" he cheered.  "This is the best dance ever!!!"  The same sixth grade girl who had wanted to ask him out before turned around and walked away at that point.  You see, she had figured that maybe Luffy's song was just a temporary stupidity that he was feeling, but now her suspicions were confirmed that he was an idiot and she never wanted to dance with him.  Ever.

Luffy wasn't alone for very long until Zoro suddenly walked up to him looking very casual, as well as being dressed very casually.  "WOW!!!" Luffy exclaimed.  "I thought you said that you weren't going to come to this dance!!"

"If you remember correctly, Nami forced me to." Zoro said with a sigh as Nami popped up behind him with a grin.

"Come on, Zoro, I have to show you off to all my friends!!" she said.  "All you have to do is stand there and nod and leave all the talking to me!"

"I feel like I'm being used." Zoro said.

"Oh, I haven't even BEGUN." Nami laughed.  But then she frowned and took his hat off.  "You can't wear a hat to a dance!"

"I have hat hair!" Zoro said as he took the hat back and put it back on his head.

Just then, Usopp came strolling over to everyone else linked arms with Kaya who looked giddy with happiness that she was at the dance with Usopp.

"Hi everyone!" said Usopp who was dressed in a tuxedo with his spinny tie.  "I just wanted to introduce you to my date, Kaya!"

"Hi!" said Kaya who was thrilled to meet Zoro and Nami since they were older than her but was indifferent about meeting Luffy, especially since she already knew who he was.

"I can't believe YOU actually got a date." Said Zoro as Kaya left to talk to her friends.

"It's the tie." Said Usopp as he spun the tie.  "But I thought you said that you weren't even going to come!"

"He asked me after all!" Nami was quick to say.

"No, YOU asked ME and even though I said no, you FORCED me to!" Zoro said angrily.  Nami laughed and told Zoro that he was silly as she noticed a few of her friends in her grade were watching.

"Don't you DARE ruin this for me!" Nami said in a very threatening voice to Zoro who was only a little freaked out.

Sanji didn't show up for another fifteen minutes since he had to be fashionably late and make a good entrance.  When he came in, his numerous dates that seemed to have slipped his mind came running over to him demanding that they would get the first dance.  He was dressed in his brown khakis and a white collared shirt with the cuffs unbuttoned so even though he APPEARED to be dressed up, he was really only semi-formal.

There was much party-hartying until the DJ, who was actually a history teacher but there was a hype that he was a professional DJ even though he isn't, declared that it was now time to play Coke and Pepsi and that everyone needed a co-ed partner!!

"You have to be MY partner, Zoro!" said Nami.

"No." said Zoro, stepping away.  "It's bad enough I have to be here and pretend to be your date.  I am definitely NOT playing Coke and Pepsi."

"But you HAVE to!!" Nami said.  "I loaned you money!!"

"Coke and Pepsi is below me." Zoro replied.

"I'LL be your partner, Nami!!" Sanji said, running up.

"But Sanji, you said you'd be MY partner!!" said some random girl who had asked him a few days before that if the situation of Coke and Pepsi were to arise then he would promise to be her partner.  And, since it was a promise, he wasn't about to go back on it.

"Plus, I'm already Zoro's partner." Nami said as she grabbed Zoro's arm, making sure that what she said was loud enough for the eighth grade girl to hear.  After all, here Nami was, A SEVENTH GRADER, at the dance with an EIGHTH GRADER.  There was like…an entire year between them.  I mean, she was in seventh and he was…in eighth.

Usopp, of course, chose to be with Kaya but they pretty much turned to each other at the exact same time and said, "Do you want to be my partner?"  And then Kaya spun Usopp's tie.  And then they jumped up and down for a minute or so and then she spun it again.

Luffy didn't have a partner.  But he was the self proclaimed 'Sprite' of the dance.

"All right, for everyone who doesn't know what Coke and Pepsi is," started the DJ, mostly for you, the reader, just in case you don't know cause everyone at this dance knows how to play.  "Boys on one side of the room and girls on the other side, standing across from your partner.  Boys are COKE and girls are PEPSI.  When I say COKE, the boys have to run across the room and sit on the girls' laps but if I say PEPSI then the girls have to run across the room and sit on the boys' laps.  If I say 7-UP then you both have to run in the center, link arms and lift each other up.  If you're last to your partner's lap or if you mess up, then you're eliminated!!"

At the sound of 'eliminated', Zoro looked up.  "It's a competition?" he said, turning to Nami.  She nodded.  "Well, in that case, we're winning this so you better not slow me down."

Even though Nami's the kind of girl to purposely get herself out first to get attention, she figured she'd get even more attention if she managed to win and was able to stand up right next to Zoro… who was an eighth grader.  Who claimed he wasn't going to go to the dance in the first place…but then he met the girl of his dreams and NEEDED to go.  Yes, that was her story and she was sticking to it.

So Luffy frolicked up and down the two lines screaming 'SPRITE!!' and occasionally yell out either COKE or PEPSI and all the kids would get confused and he actually ended up getting a few of them out.  But the DJ didn't really mind, in fact, he LIKED it!  Because there were SO many kids at the dance, it would take a real long time to get them out so Luffy was now his little helper as well as being an obstacle that people sometimes had to get around!

"NAMI!" Sanji yelled.  "MY LAP IS FREE!!!"  But then his partner sat down on his lap and Nami ran over and sat on Zoro's.  Sanji got momentarily depressed but then he remembered that there was a pretty girl sitting on his lap and that was ALMOST as good.

So everyone continued to run back and forth until many, many people were eliminated so that only a few pairs remained.  Among them being Nami and Zoro.  Nami made sure to wave to all her friends as she sat down on Zoro's lap but he wasn't even paying attention because he was mainly focused on the track star kid who was right next to him who was glaring at him as his girlfriend waved to HER friends.  You see, while he had speed during the running part, he was VERY slow when it came to sitting down.  Zoro didn't care, he just threw himself to the appointed spot, not caring about any scars or pain or bruises he may receive from this infernal Coke and Pepsi game.  He had to win.  That track star kid was going DOWN!

Soon, it was down to Zoro and the track star.  And of course…the females.  The WOMEN were slowing down the game so drastically that every time Nami shuffled across the room taking deep breaths and almost tripping over her high heels, Zoro had a hard time watching.  He was only glad that the track star's girlfriend was not ALSO a track star.

"I will win." Said Zoro as the girls made their way across the dance floor.

"In your dreams." Said the track star, his eyes narrowing.

"7-UP!!" yelled the DJ as the track star and Zoro both sprang up and started running towards the middle.  The girls were already there, so it was a race between him and the track star.  Everything seemed to go in slow motion as they closed in and spun around to latch arms.

The track star got there first.  Zoro was quick on the arms.  That's when Luffy came out of nowhere and jumped the track star.  "SPRITE HATES 7-UP BECAUSE IT'S A COPY OF SPRITE!!!" he yelled.

"And the winners are the popular eighth grade boy with freakish green hair and his date who is only a seventh grader but MUST be cool because she's at the dance with an eighth grader!!" announced the DJ.

Nami clapped to herself on the inside as Zoro took one last glare at the track star.

"And you win…A HULA-HOOP!!!" the DJ exclaimed, pulling a pink hula-hoop out from behind him and holding it up. 

"What is this?!" Zoro demanded as it offended him more than it should have.  "A single pink hula-hoop to share between the two of us is the only fruits of our labors?!  I've never been so outraged!!"

Fortunately, no one could hear him because the DJ had started playing the music again and it was the Monster Mash.

"Thanks SO much Zoro!" said Nami.  "I believe that before this dance I wasn't even in the top ten most popular girls in seventh grade but now, I think that I'm in that list!  Maybe even the top FIVE!  Could I even be one of the most popular girls in the whole school?!"

"Nami, that was so cool the way you won with an eighth grader." Said some random girl.

"Yeah, Nami, I'm an eighth grader." Said another girl.  "Hang out with me."

"No, hang out with ME!" said the first.

"Nami, will you dance with me?" asked a popular eighth grade boy.

"Oh Zoro, is it all right if I dance with this popular eighth grade boy and hang out with these popular eighth grade girls?" Nami asked.

"I don't care." Said Zoro who was still enraged by the mere presence of the hula-hoop and would probably remain in shock for a long time.

"Good!" Nami said as she walked off with all of her new artificial friends.

Then Sanji ran up to where Nami had been and his Nami senses started tingling.  He followed her scent and eventually found her talking to all her eighth grade friends.

"Nami!" he said.  "Won't you dance with me, Coke and Pepsi Champion?!"

"Oh popular eighth grader Sanji, no matter how many times you ask me to dance with you, I declined your invitation to accompany you to this very dance simply because you're just not my type!" Nami said, loud enough for everyone to hear her.

"Huh?" Sanji said.

"Wow!" said one of the eighth grade girls.  "SANJI asked YOU to the dance and YOU turned HIM down?"

"I did." Nami said with a sigh.

"That's amazing." Said the girl as she pulled a professional looking list of the most popular girls in school and promptly moved Nami up to Number Ten, moving the previous Number Ten off the list.  "But if he's not taken, I'LL dance with him!  Will you dance with me, Sanji?"

"Of course." Said Sanji who was momentarily distracted.  "Nothing would make me happier."

As Sanji danced with the random eighth grade girl, Nami figured that if she danced with Sanji then maybe her social status in the school might even move up to Nine, or Eight or even SEVEN!  So she decided that the next time Sanji asked her to dance, she would grace him with the answer of yes that would probably surprise him so much that he would have a heart attack and perish.

Meanwhile, Usopp was trying to score with Kaya.  "I got your some punch!" said Usopp as he walked over to where Kaya was standing and handed her a little paper cup.

"Thanks Usopp!" she said happily as she WAY TOO GLADLY took a sip of the punch and then chuckled afterwards as if it was that much better just because Usopp had gotten it for her.  That went on for a while.  Drinking, laughing, drinking some more, laughing some more, and most of it was conducted extremely nervously, especially on Usopp's part because even though no love is real in middle school, (actually, practically nothing is real in middle school) THEY didn't know that at the time so it all seemed so important.

"So uh…" started Usopp as he shyly kicked the ground.  "So uh…so uh…so uh…so uh…"

"What is it, Usopp?" asked Kaya.

"Would you uh…would you uh…would you uh…"

"Usopp, are you trying to ask me to dance?" Kaya asked playfully.  Usopp nodded excitedly.  "Then I would love to!"  No sooner had they started getting it down to 'Bye Bye Bye' when the music stopped and 'Cotton Eyed Jyou' began.

"Where are you going Kaya?" asked Usopp as Kaya started walking out of the dance area.  "Do you not want to dance with me anymore?"

"No, no, no!" said Kaya, shaking her head.  "I really DO want to dance with you but I just don't know the dance to Cotton Eyed Jyou!"

"Is that all?" laughed Usopp.  "You should have just said so!  I can teach you how if you want me to!"

"Would you really?" Kaya said, jumping up and down and clapping her hands happily.  She was an aspiring cheerleader and would someday grow up to be the most popular girl in eighth grade but since she was only a sixth grader as of now, she was still looked down upon.  Though, the seventh and eighth graders did recognize her potential to go all the way and if Usopp was lucky, he might get to ride along next to her.

So, Usopp began his attempts to teach Kaya how to dance like that crazy Cotton Eyed Jyou as Zoro stood in the corner with a black aura around him, still infuriated about the hula-hoop he had worked so hard to win.  Nami pretended as though she didn't know the dance so people could teach her how and she acted like she was a whole lot more incompetent than she actually was.  Luffy was still playing with his balloon and dancing the Cotton Eyed Luffy.  As for Sanji, the entire dance ended up forming a clapping circle around him as he preformed the Cotton Eyed Jyou even though it was just like everyone else's dances.  Even after the song ended, another upbeat N'Sync song started playing, a few girls got in the middle of the circle and Sanji danced with three or even four girls at the same time as everyone continued to clap and cheer.

Zoro was STILL infuriated.

Then it was time for the slow songs.  Nami's artificial friends left her to dance with their actual dates and then she was alone to wander the streets of Laredo, searching for a partner before the song ended.  But she couldn't look TOO hard or else it just might look like she's desperate and she definitely didn't want to be pushed down off the Top Ten Most Popular Girls.

Zoro was nowhere to be found (he had gone off to the bathroom to destroy his hula-hoop out of sheer anger) so Nami didn't know what to do.  Then it happened.  It was Sanji!

"Nami, I would be delighted if you would dance with me to this song." He said, holding out his hand.

Her eyes darted from eighth grader to eighth grader and it seemed as though all of them were watching her even though none of them really were.  It was now or never!  "All right, Sanji, but don't read too much into this…" she said, taking his hand.

Of course, slow dances in middle school were very awkward.  The girl put both her hands on the boy's shoulders and the boy would put both his hands on the girl's waist.  Neither allowed to bend their arms or have any physical contact except where their hands touched their partner.  This proved to be a very discomforting situation so both people ended up just looking around at the pretty decorations.

Even the principal went around the room with his ruler making sure that there was sufficient amount of space between the boy and girl.  He was very strict on his rules about public display of affection and if he spotted any of it, he forced both kids to sit out for the rest of the dance and a call went home to their parents.

Sometimes, when the principal's back was turned, they would sneak in a quick snuggle, but that was only the eighth graders.  There might have been a few seventh graders who would do it too but it was very rushed and uncomfortable so ended up proving absolutely nothing.  Sixth graders?  Pssshhh.  They didn't even think about it.  They were still pure.

"Hurry Nami, the principal isn't looking!" Sanji whispered as he attempted to pull Nami close to him.

"Yeah, neither are any of the eighth graders!" Nami said since she was looking at eighth graders and not pretty decorations.  She didn't want to have any superfluous snuggling with Sanji unless it would boost her on the popularity list.

However, there were plenty of girls who would have given the world to be in Nami's situation as they sat on the chairs lined up around the perimeter of the cafeteria (which is where the dance was) and sighed longingly, watching their great god off dancing with Nami the seventh grader.  Everyone knew her name because she was now Number Seven on the Top Ten Most Popular Girls but they still held a bit of resentment.  Especially Number Eleven whom everyone had forgotten and looked to as old news.  Poor Sanji had no idea that mere physical contact with him made girls more popular, for he was infinitely more popular than Number Two on the Top Ten Most Popular Boys since he was, after all, Number One.

"Usopp, I'm really glad you asked me to the dance." Said Kaya as she looked lovingly into Usopp's eyes.

"Really?" Usopp said with a deep sigh and a huge grin.

"Yeah!" said Kaya.  "And I hope that we can go on more dates in the future when we're in seventh grade!"

"Absolutely!" said Usopp.  "And in eighth grade and all the way up until we're in high school!"

"That would make me so happy!" said Kaya.  "To be honest, I always thought you were a loser with no fashion sense and a big ugly nose."

"You did?" Usopp said, genuinely surprised.

Kaya nodded.  "But the more I get to know you, the more I grow to like your nose and your sense of fashion!" she finished.

Little did Kaya or Usopp know, but a popular girl like Kaya liking Usopp's sense of fashion pushed him out of the Loser Group and into the Middle Group.  You see, in middle school, there are five main groups.  If you get in the wrong one, it's VERY hard to get out.

The Popular Group: Usually rich people who wear the latest trends and styles.  Usually, these people decide where everyone else falls in the social ladder of middle school.  If you don't just grow up in this category, it's hard to get in.

The Middle Group: All the people who aren't quite popular and aren't quite losers.  These are the people that no one has anything against, but frequently forget their last names but the Popular People can snap their fingers a few times and say, "Oh right!  Is that that kid with the hat…?"  This group makes up the majority of the middle school population.

The Loser Group: These are all the kids who don't dress like the popular kids and wear thick glasses and carry around wheely backpacks.  There's no getting around it.

The People Who THINK Their Popular Group: Here's where all the kids fall who keep up with the latest trends and think they have all the right friends and things to say but were previously in either the Middle Group or the Loser Group and can't quite make the final jump to the Popular Group.

The Indifferent Group: Finally, these are all those people that are left over.  The people who just don't care about where they fall and are happy.  THESE people can make friends with people in every group and no one would disapprove or think twice about it.

In middle school, there really aren't any other groups.  Think about it.  What group were YOU in?

When the dance was over, Nami had somehow got her social status all the way up to Number Five, and she knew that everyone ahead of her was in eighth grade so next year, she would be the most popular girl in the entire school.  So she thanked Zoro and Sanji who were just like, "…Yeah…?  You're…welcome…?"

Kaya and Usopp arranged to see each other every day over the summer to talk and see movies and make Kool-Aid and collect bugs and read comic books.  But they didn't kiss since they're only sixth graders, even though we've already stated that on numerous accounts so there's no need for us to remind you about that anymore!

Sanji said good-bye to his abundant girlfriends and they were all sad to leave him even though they would see him again on Monday.  But all girls got sad when it was the weekend since they lived to be near Sanji.

Zoro walked around in a circle and then stood still.  He wasn't doing anything particular so don't ask him to entertain you.  Don't you have enough entertainment as it is?

As for Luffy…well, no one could really explain what happened to him.  He disappeared half way through Cotton Eyed Luffy and hasn't reappeared ever since.  So, after searching for about ten minutes, everyone called it a night and the DJ turned the lights off and the music shut down.

All the kids went outside to wait for their moms to come and pick them up.


	5. Luffy's Neighbor

The next morning, Zoro awoke with a start.  Someone was throwing rocks at his window?  He got out of bed, wearing the clothes he had worn to the dance, and opened up the window to see Luffy standing down there waving his arms around crazily.

"HEY ZORO!!!" he yelled.  "Do you wanna come out and play?!"

"Do you have any idea what time it is?" Zoro said as he grabbed his clock and looked at it.  It was a little past noon.  "You woke me up early!!"

"Sorry!!" said Luffy.  "I wasn't gonna wake you up but my neighbor is driving me to Water Country and I was wondering if you wanted to come!"

Zoro wasn't about to turn down a trip to water country.  "Let me just get my bathing suit." He called as Luffy threw a party of happiness that Zoro had decided to come with him.

So Zoro rummaged through his extremely untidy room through all his drawers and under his bed and in his closet.  It was getting close to hopeless though, and Zoro began to wonder if he actually had a bathing suit anymore when he finally spotted it at the very back of the furthest corner of his bottom drawer.  He slipped on his rebellious teenager hat, not even bothering to change (since he had only worn those clothes for PART of the day) and hurried down the stairs and around the corner until he was outside with Luffy.

"YAY!!" cheered Luffy.  "I'm glad you weren't busy today.  I'm also glad that today was such a sunny and cloudless day so there's no chance for rain!"

Zoro shielded his eyes and looked up at the sky.  "This is true." He finally concluded since you can never really take Luffy's word on pretty much anything.

"Come on, let's go get everyone else!" Luffy declared as he took off on his way to Nami's house.  He had a certain route that he took when he wanted to round up all his best buddies and it, ironically enough, started with Zoro, ended with Sanji with Nami and Usopp in the middle arranged as just.

Luffy ran around to Nami's backyard in search of her bedroom window.  He found a few rocks and began to toss them at the window as Zoro just kind of stood there and watched.  He was used to this.  When he had first come around the neighborhood with Luffy, he had asked, "Haven't you ever heard of doorbells?" and Luffy had turned around and with THE MOST confused expression on his face EVER, he replied, "No."

Nami opened up the window and waved.  "Hey guys!" she said.

"You're in an unusually happy mood." Said Zoro.

"Of course!" said Nami.  "I'm one of the most popular girls in school!"

"Oh." Said Luffy.  "Well, my neighbor is taking us to Water Country!  Do you want to come with us?"

"Awesome!" said Nami.  "I just got a new bathing suit so I can show it off!  I'll be down in a second!"

Nami's room was decorated with pictures of her friends and posters of hot pop artists like Justin Timberlake and a few others.  Her bed was fixed up all nice and pretty with all the stuffed animals and pillows arranged meticulously and after a minute of searching, she found her new bikini, even though middle school girls really don't have enough development for bikinis.  She put her matching towel in a matching bag and even brought an extra set of clothing just in case the first set got wet.

She wasn't outside in a second like she had said, but she WAS outside in a few minutes and that was okay since Luffy and Zoro had gotten engaged in an enthralling conversation about…well, I won't even bother.

"Thanks again for asking me to the dance, Zoro!" said Nami.

"I didn't ask, you forced me to take you." Zoro said, sounding annoyed that he had to keep reminding her.  She had probably told the story so many times that she got the point in which she was beginning to believe that's the way it actually happened.

They took their little party over to Usopp's house that was pretty much just around the corner.  Instead of having to go around to look for rocks and then throwing them at his window, Usopp was actually on his front steps waving goodbye to Kaya as Merry was picking her up from their 'playdate'.  Kaya had to leave early because she had piano lessons.

"Hi guys!" said Usopp as the limo pulled away.  He noticed Nami dressed up in her beachwear.  "You going to the beach?"

"Even better!" said Luffy.  "My neighbor is taking us to WATER COUNTRY!!"

"ALL RIGHT!!" Usopp cheered, getting all into it.  "That's awesome because it's so hot!  And I'm already wearing my bathing suit because me and Kaya were just jumping through the sprinkler!"

"WOW!!!" yelled Luffy.  "Guys, let's stay here and play in the sprinkler!"

"NO!" said Nami and Zoro as they hit Luffy on the head.

"Just let me go get my towel!" Usopp said as he skipped into his little cottage-like house that was only one floor.  He searched for a dry towel and found one pretty easily and put all the essentials into a little bag that he could carry into Water Country.

"Let's go!!" Usopp yelled as he ran back outside.

Then they had to make the journey to Sanji's house!!  He lived pretty far away, but that was relative to a group of four middle school kids running around the neighborhood so he really didn't live THAT far away.  After all, he goes to the same bus stop as them.  But they practically had to backtrack and go PAST Luffy's house and go the other direction cause they live pretty much in this order:

Usopp, Nami, Zoro, Luffy, Sanji  (Not all next store of course.)

So since Luffy is sort of a dimwit, he doesn't bother to get Sanji FIRST and then go to Zoro, Nami and Usopp.  But they had to go back to Luffy's house anyway since it was HIS neighbor who was driving them to their prize destination.

"And then we poured some salt on an ice cube because in my 'Science At Home' book, it says something really cool would happen!" Usopp explained to everyone else as if they cared as Luffy threw rocks at Sanji's bedroom window.  "And you know what?!  Something cool DID happen!!"

They were all saved from the continuation of this story by the sound of Sanji's window opening.  "You know, I have so many scratches on this window." He sighed.  He had also asked Luffy the first few times around, "Haven't you ever heard of a doorbell?" and Luffy had, once again, replied with a, "No."  Pretty much everyone had gone through that process by this time.

"My neighbor is taking us to Water Country!" said Luffy.  "Come with us!"

"Yes, I WILL grace you with my presence!" Sanji said with a shrug as he shut the window, not even bothering to tell them that he would hurry up and come down.  Because that would be lying.

Yes, Sanji took his time to choose the right bathing suit for the occasion of Water Country, and then had to pick out the matching sunglasses that he most certainly required.  Then he had to change into the appropriate clothing for Water Country and grab his bag of toiletries with conditioner and a comb among other things so he may wash all the chlorine out of his hair at the end of the day.  Along with these things, he also had to find his sandals, sunscreen, towel and many other things that would be pointless to just ramble off!

His room was sort of a light purple color and always neat and tidy, not a single thing ever out of place.  All of his shirts were hung up nicely and his pants all ironed and hung up as well.  He even had his outfits planned out for the week and NEVER wore the same combination twice.

He did none of this with any hurry at all and it almost got to the point in which Luffy was going to peek in the front door to call to him to make sure he was still alive.  Nonchalantly, he strolled out of the house.

"Nami!" he said.  "Last night, the only dance I thought about was the dance you blessed me with!"

"I told you not to read too much into that!" yelled Nami.

"Oh, don't worry, I'm not, Nami." Said Sanji even though he WAS.  He was either choosing to lie or simply was in denial.  You can never really tell with Sanji.

"BACK TO MY HOUSE!!" Luffy yelled, jumping up and punching the air.

So they all went back to Luffy's house and went inside where Ace was sitting at the kitchen table eating a sandwich.  He was a freshman in high school so that made him automatically above everyone else, even if he was in the Loser Group, which he ISN'T.  He's more in the fence of the Middle Group and the Popular Group, leaning more towards the Middle Group.  At least, that's how he'd be grouped if he was in middle school or being talked about by the kids in middle school.  No, in high school there were only four groups: Freshmen, Sophomores, Juniors and Seniors.

Freshmen think they're sooooo cool because they're in high school now.

Sophomores think they're sooooo cool because they're not Freshmen anymore.

Juniors think they're sooooo cool because they're upperclassmen now.

And Seniors think they're sooooo cool because they are.

And that's the way high school works.  Mainly, the older you are, the cooler you are.  It has nothing to do with how you dress or how much money you have.  Just what year you were born in.

So even though Ace was the man to his brother and all his brother's middle school friends, he was really at the bottom of the totem pole in his school.  But not for long!  Soon, he would be a sophomore so he would be allowed to hit on girls that were outside of his grade, which was always cool.

"Hi Ace!" said Luffy as he ran over to Ace.

"Hey Luffy!" Ace answered because even though Luffy's a bit slow, Ace is the kind of brother who will wave to his little freshman brother in the hall even when he's a senior.  He'd even take Luffy to Friendly's after Luffy's first break-up.  He'll be standing there in his varsity jacket and Luffy will have his arms crossed with his eyes tearing up and Ace will turn to Luffy and say, "Come on, let's go to Friendly's," and make everything all better.

Ace acknowledged the existence of all of Luffy's little friends.  "Are you two ready to go to high school?" he asked Zoro and Sanji.

"I can't wait to meet all the pretty girls!" Sanji said truthfully as his eyes turned into hearts at the mere thought of it.

"Whatever." Said Zoro.  In his opinion, high school was only a bigger building and he had to wake up earlier.  He didn't have any qualms with middle school and didn't really care if he stayed there forever, but he also didn't care if he never went back.  It's really just like he said; whatever.

"Don't worry, being a freshman's not as bad as people make it out to be." Ace said because he's even the kind of guy who will wave to his little brother's friends in the hallway even if they ARE freshmen.

"HEY!!" yelled Luffy as he started running around, flailing his arms about and knocking over many precious valuables.  "I thought our neighbor was going to take us to Water Country!!"

"She is." Said Ace, grabbing Luffy's collar and halting him.  "She just called and said she was going to be a little late."

"OKAY!!" said Luffy, turning to everyone else.  "How about we play Dr. Mario while we're waiting for my neighbor to get here?!"

"That's a two player game, Luffy." Said Ace.

"Hmm, you're right." Said Luffy, scratching his chin.  "In that case, we can go outside and play a game there!"  Everyone figured to just humor Luffy since he was taking them to Water Country after all so they all went outside to Luffy's front yard and sat down on the grass.

"All right!" said Luffy.  "Let's play PIRATES!  I'm the captain.  Zoro, you can be my first mate."

Zoro only raised an eyebrow in response.

"I want to be the captain!" complained Usopp.

"YOU can be the look-out and the handyman!" Luffy appointed.  "I thought of the game so I get to be captain."

"Don't you think we're a little old to be playing these kinds of games?" Nami asked just in case there was the off chance that a person she knows could just walk by and spot her playing pirates.

"No!" said Luffy.  "You can be our cook."

"I don't want to be the cook." Nami whined.

"I'll be the cook!" said Sanji.

"Yeah, let Sanji be the cook, he's so much better at it." Nami said.

"Fine, you can be our compass person." Luffy corrected himself.

"You mean the Navigator?" Nami said.

"YEAH!" said Luffy, liking the sound of that word.

"So I'm the cook?" Sanji said happily.

"Yes you are!" said Luffy just as, if not MORE, happily.  Just as they were about to commence their frolicking, a car drove up into the driveway.  Well, obviously.  Where else would it drive up?  On the house?  On the lawn?  Think, people, think.  The driver of the car, which is just some random neighbor with no name, rolled down her window.

"I hope you all don't mind getting very friendly." She said.  "Because my car only has four seats."

"Shotgun." Said Zoro quickly as he jumped in the front seat.

"The captain should get shotgun!!!" Luffy yelled as he stood outside the front seat of the car with his arms crossed.

"Nami, would you like to sit on my lap?" asked Sanji as he climbed in and buckled himself in so he wouldn't have to sit in the MIDDLE next to either Luffy or Usopp!  Nami just pushed Usopp in so that Sanji had to sit next to Usopp instead.  Sanji tried to make it look like he didn't care but he was crying on the inside and we all know it.  

"Can I sit in the front?" she asked.  "Since I'm the girl and all."

Luffy's neighbor looked at the crowd of boys that she had and thought for a second before forcing Zoro and Luffy to get in the backseat as well.  Nami sat in the front while all the boys sat in the back.  Sanji and Zoro were on the ends with Luffy and Usopp squeezed in between.

"I'M NOT WEARING A SEATBELT!!" Luffy announced since he was the only one without a belt.

"That's all right." Said Zoro.  "You're squeezed in so tightly that even if we DID get into an accident, you wouldn't go flying through the windshield."

"No, I want a seatbelt!" Luffy complained.

Finally, after much whining, Usopp offered to share his seatbelt with Luffy and then they were off!  They played many beguiling games like 'Spot the Car', which everyone found to their liking since there were cars EVERYWHERE that they could spot!!  And the neighbor was even good enough to put on Radio Disney for them so they could listen to Lizzy Maguire, Dream Street, Lil Romeo and Play's most recent hits.

After many grueling hours, they were there.  Luffy's neighbor told him that she'd pick him up at 8:00 and then she drove away.  Awfully nice neighbor he has, willing to drive HOURS to Water Country for them, all the way back home and then all the way back to Water Country and then all the way back home in one day.

"Wait a second…" said Usopp observing the sign.  "Water Country closes at 6:00."

"We can't let THAT ruin our fun!!" said Luffy as he stripped down to his bathing suit and began jumping around waiting for everyone to do the same thing.  Of course they didn't have to wait in line to pay because then otherwise I'd have to write that out and you'd have to read it and neither of us really want to do that, do we?


	6. Water Country Have Some Fun!

So they got in and went to go and find a nice cabana to put all their stuff in.  Of course, since this was such a lovely day, all the cabanas were taken so they had to go and find an umbrella that wasn't in use.  Unfortunately for them, all the tables that had umbrellas were piled with other people's towels and clothes whereas all the tables in the sun were nice and empty.  So, after long wondering on whether they were doomed to be in the sun during their stay, they finally uprooted an umbrella from its home and carried it off to a remote location where no one would even think to look for it.

"All right, I have to change into my bathing suit!" Nami declared as she took her stuff to go off to the changing rooms.  Zoro and Sanji also had to change into the bathing suits so they shrugged and went off to the MALE'S changing room.  No one even thought to tell Usopp and Luffy (who already had their bathing suits on) to wait for them.  So they just took off without telling anyone.

"Let's go down the biggest waterslide!!" Luffy declared as he yanked on the drawstrings of his orange bathing suit.

"I love the big waterslides!" Usopp yelled as his legs shook with fear.  Usopp was wearing one of those one-piece MALE bathing suits with candy cane stripes that you see characters on shows like Loony Toons wearing.

"The Black Hole!!" Luffy said pointing to a waterslide off in the distance that was black and went straight down and was about a mile high.  

"Th-th-the WHAT?" Usopp stuttered.

"Let's go Usopp!" Luffy said as he began dragging Usopp off to the Black Hole much to Usopp's protest.

Meanwhile, in the male's changing room…

Sanji was having an ordeal.  He needed someone to apply his suntan lotion but who?  He knew deep down in his heart that Nami would not and he wasn't about to have Zoro do it!  And Luffy and Usopp were SIXTH graders so having them do it would be the epitome of uncool.

So he tried the best he could with the mirror to get every speck of his back and when he was finally satisfied, joined Zoro and Nami in the being outside party.

"NAMI!!" he yelled when catching sight of Nami's tiny little bikini that was yellow and had sunflowers on it with a tie top.  "I LOVE YOUR BATHING SUIT!!!  Do you like mine?"

Nami looked at Sanji's baby blue bathing suit with 'Aeropostale' scripted across the leg in gold cursive lettering.  It's not like a girl can be impressed with a man's bathing suit because they're really only shorts made especially for swimming in.  It would kind of be like…if someone came up to another person and said, "Do you like my arms?  Aren't they fashionable?"

But, since Nami is occasionally nice to Sanji, she gave him the thumbs up just to humor him.

Sanji SHOULD have asked about his arms, however, because that would have diverted Nami's attention from his hairy legs.  He didn't like his hairy legs and even though he is very meticulous about his appearance, he had forgotten to shave for the past couple months or so.  Zoro's legs weren't hairy.  Sanji didn't think that was fair.  He wanted to see Zoro with hairy legs because he could only assume that legs covered in green hair would be a hilarious sight that would amuse him for days on end.

Zoro was wearing a blue bathing suit.  It was one of those typical male bathing suits like Sanji's.  But there was something that put it above Sanji's.  Inside the pockets was a little plastic case so that Zoro could store things like money and paper and stuff and not have to worry about it getting wet!!  Sanji's just had REGULAR pockets.  Pockets on a bathing suit are USELESS unless you have that extra plastic case like Zoro did.

"Where are the other two?" asked Nami as she looked around.

"Uh…" Zoro and Sanji both fumbled as they searched for the other two as well.

"OH WELL!!" said Nami.  "We'll find them sooner or later!  How about the three of us go off and do some waterslides!!"  Even though they were not in school, it was still apparent that Sanji and Zoro were both older than Nami was and wouldn't she look cool if she were walking around with them in her small little bikini?  And then, when they got in line, she could suddenly ask them what it was like to be going into high school.  Oh yeah.

The first thing on their 'To Do' list was to get some tubes so they wouldn't have to wait in line to get a tube and then wait in line again to get on the slide.  They went to the cashier place and used the money that Luffy's random, helpful neighbor had given them to rent a double tube and a single tube since the combo cost less.

"Nami, I would be delighted if you rode on the double tube with me!" Sanji said as he chased Nami up the stairs with the double tube over his head.  Zoro rolled the single tube up the stairs a little behind Sanji but he didn't really care since he wasn't RACING or anything.  If they were RACING then he would have been SO far ahead of Sanji AND Nami.

"Actually Sanji…" said Nami.  "I think I'll be taking the SINGLE tube down this slide."

"Then why am I carrying it?" asked Zoro as he attempted to hand the tube off to Nami.

"Oh Zoro!" Nami pretended to cry.  "I only PAID for the tube."

"I thought Luffy's neighbor…" started Sanji but Nami elbowed him.  Even though Sanji knew that he would get to ride with Nami if Zoro kept the single tube, Sanji still kept silent and refrained from giving Zoro the news that he was so oblivious of.

"So because you paid for it, I have to carry it AND go down in a double tube with SANJI?" asked Zoro with a raised eyebrow.

"Yes." Said Nami.

"No." said Zoro.

Suddenly, a group of boys that were DEFINITELY in high school passed by talking and being cool and gnarly and awesome.

"All right, Sanji!" said Nami loud enough for them to hear.  "I'll go down the double tube with you!"

Then one of them turned around and faced her.  He pointed at Sanji.  "Hey, isn't he like…a year older than you?" he asked Nami.

"He is!" Nami said.  "But he still craves for my love."

"That's so cool." Said the guy.  "Will you go down the double tube with me instead?"

"Of course I will!" said Nami as she tore the double tube out of Sanji's hands.  The boy dropped his single tube, took the double tube and walked with Nami up to the top of the stairs.

"That's so unfair." sighed Sanji.  "Just because I'm popular, a lady killer, attractive AND a year older than Nami, she can score just by being associated with me."

"You're just being used." Said Zoro as he pushed past Sanji and started making his way up the stairs.

"No I'm not!" said Sanji as he grabbed the single tube and followed after him.  "It just so happened to work out that way!  There was absolutely no pre-planning of this on Nami's part!  She's just the victim, you know!  She had no idea that the guys would be impressed by my mere presence…"

"All right, listen, YES SHE DID." Zoro said, hoping to wake him up.

"That would be putting WAY too much on the line and Nami's not one to do that." Said Sanji as the two of them got to the front of the line.

"Well, it's moving her up in popularity and that's what she seems to want." Said Zoro.  "I'm going first by the way."

Zoro set his tube down on the slide.

"What?!" Sanji demanded.  "I was in front of you!"

"See you at the bottom." Zoro said with a smirk as he pushed himself down the slide.  Sanji got SO enraged for absolutely no reason, put his tube down and went down the slide before the guy who monitors the slide could tell Sanji not to.

Using his mad leg strength, Sanji was able to push off the top to gain some intense speed and catch up to Zoro reasonably quickly.

"Cut in front of ME, will you?" Sanji asked as his tube crashed into Zoro's.  Zoro was mildly surprised but wasn't about to show it.

"Back off, Home Ec Boy!" said Zoro with a glare that he figured would simply scare Sanji away.

Sanji wasn't scared, and he wasn't offended that Zoro had called him Home Ec Boy because he LOVED home economics!  "This will teach you not to take my spot in line!" Sanji said as he kicked the tube Zoro was on and the force of the rubbery surface bounced Zoro up into the air and landed him on the slide, behind Sanji who was throwing himself a party because of his recent triumph over Zoro.

Zoro wasn't about to let it all end there so he actually stood up on the slide, ran down to Sanji and grabbed his tube, using all his might to stop it in place.  Sanji wasn't afraid to show his surprise as he tried to turn around to fend off Zoro but Zoro flipped the tube upside down and then tossed it off the slide.

Sanji angrily grabbed Zoro's leg and pulled him down as well so they were both tumbling down the slide quite pathetically and uncontrollably.  Finally, they reached the pool that was only about two feet deep and hurt their bottoms on the hard pool ground.  Nami was standing up on the pool edge with some of her artificial acquaintances and slapped her forehead, not even bothering to ask how a situation like that one had come along.  As Zoro and Sanji were just about to duke it out in the tiny pool, Zoro's tube came down and whapped them both in the head.

Nami decided to show to her false friends that she was ABOVE her real friends who were older than her and both of the male gender.  She walked into the pool just as the two of them emerged, angry as ever.  Just as the two of them were about to smite each other, Nami hit them both on the head and dragged them out of the pool.

"Whoa…" said one of the boys.  "She's ABOVE those older boys.  She's SO cool!"

"Yeah!" said another one as the two of them walked off while talking about how Nami might very well have moved up to the number FOUR slot of the most popular girl in school.

"Where's your tube?" Nami asked Sanji as he rubbed his heart-shaped lump in pain.

"It's right here!" said Sanji as he held up the double tube that Nami had gone down with some random boy.  "With YOU!!"

Nami groaned and grabbed Zoro's single tube and began walking off.  "We're going in the Lazy River.  I get the single tube."

"WHAT?!" Sanji and Zoro both yelled at the same time as they followed behind Nami carrying the double tube.  "I have to SHARE a tube in the LAZY RIVER with HIM?!"

They took the opportunity to foam at each other as they walked into the Lazy River.

"Don't get rid of that tube either!" Nami commanded as she watched as Sanji and Zoro attempted to set the double tube off into the wild.  "We paid for that!  We have to take it OUT of the Lazy River because we can't take the Lazy River tubes out of the Lazy River."

Sanji and Zoro both looked at Nami with blank expressions.

"OH FINE!" Nami said as she stomped over and took the double tube.  "I'LL take the double tube!  One of you can have this one."

"I'll go in the double tube with you, Nami!!" Sanji said.

"No!" said Nami.  "I'm sure someone else I meet will want to take that spot so you can get a tube that's already in the Lazy River that someone else is not using!"

"But Nami!" complained Sanji.  "I want to ride in the double tube with you!"

"Too bad!" said Nami as she jumped in the Lazy River with the double tube.

Zoro glared at Sanji and then got in the Lazy River with his single tube.  Sanji cried to himself for a moment but then jumped in the Lazy River WITHOUT a tube but soon collected one.

Meanwhile…

"We're next Usopp!" Luffy screamed as the two of them reached the front of the line for "The Black Hole".  Usopp was too busy reading the warning sign to hear Luffy.

"Caution, if you have a history of heart attacks, a bad back or are pregnant, you should not go down this slide.  It is advised that you wear a shirt because your back will get scratched.  If you do not cross your legs, you will get water in unwanted places." Read Usopp.  "Luffy!  I don't want water in unwanted places!!"

"Then don't drink the water." Said Luffy.

"I have a history of heart attacks, a bad back AND I'm pregnant!" Usopp said.  Then he thought.  "Forget the last one."

"It's my turn!!" Luffy yelled as he sat down on the slide.

"Don't forget to scream!" said the man who ran the slide.

"I won't!!" Luffy said excitedly as he pushed himself off.  Luffy screamed at the top of his lungs all the way down and even after he was out of the slide.  He jumped up and down and continued to scream and frightened away all the people who were standing there watching the people come down the slide.

"Are you going?" asked the man on the slide to Usopp.

"Uh…of course I am!!" declared Usopp as he got up and struck a pose.  "I would never turn down such an exciting slide!"

His knees shook crazily as he stood there still in his pose as everyone watched and waited for him to go.

"Well I'M going!" said the kid who was behind him as he pushed past Usopp and got in the slide and didn't scream because he thought he was macho.

"HEY!!!" screamed Luffy and everyone could hear him just fine.  "YOU'RE NOT USOPP!!"

"Your friend is waiting for you." Said the man on the slide to Usopp who STILL was in his pose.  Usopp pretended as though he didn't hear the guy and just continued to pose so the guy got up, grabbed Usopp and then tossed him down the hole that is black.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" screamed Usopp and, since he was not ready, he didn't have time to cross his legs and ended up getting water in unwanted places!!  ARGH!!

"YAY!!" cheered Luffy as Usopp got out of the slide as a shaking mess.  "Did you like it?!  I LIKED IT!!!  You wanna go again?!"

"Let's go on something a little less intense." Said Usopp as he tried to catch his breath and figure out how to get the water out of specific places that DEFINITELY was not supposed to be there and was DEFINITELY unwanted.  "Like the Lazy River."

"YEAH!!!" yelled Luffy as he grabbed Usopp and ran over to the entrance of the Lazy River.  The two of them grabbed a tube and were in the Lazy River quicker than you could say…um…I don't know.  Quicker than you could say something that you could potentially say very fast.

"This is much better." Said Usopp as he floated leisurely on top of his tube.  He had just begun to close his eyes when suddenly, he went under a waterfall.  

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!" laughed Luffy ever so loudly.  Then he turned around and tried to walk back to the waterfall so that he could go under it again but the current was FAR to strong so he gave up and allowed himself to float back next to Usopp.

So they floated around for a little while talking about crazy stuff like what it would be like to go through puberty when, all of a sudden, Luffy caught sight of some HUGE waves up ahead so he grabbed Usopp and pulled him to where the crazy waves were.  After chuckling warmly in the waves for a little while, he decided that he didn't want to leave and he learned from previous experiences that he couldn't BACK TRACK in the Lazy River, so he grabbed onto some poley thing and stayed in the waves while still holding onto Usopp!!!!

So the two of them were WAY to humored with their little wavey area, Zoro, Nami and Sanji suddenly came a-floatin' by!!

"HI GUYS!!!" screamed Luffy as he waved both his arms around crazily, which meant he let go of the poley thing but he was over it because he found his bestest friends and that was better than waves ANY ol' day!  "Where were you?!"

"Where were YOU?" asked Nami.  "You guys just ran off out of nowhere!"

"No, YOU guys ran off!" Usopp argued.

"We were getting changed!" said Sanji.

Then they all looked at each other for a minute.  "Nami, why do you have a double tube?" asked Luffy.

"Because THOSE TWO refused to share one." Said Nami, pointing at Sanji and Zoro.

"Can I have the double tube?" said Luffy.  "I'll share with Usopp!!"

"Whatever…" said Nami as she got out of the tube and gave it to Luffy.

"GET BACK IN YOUR TUBE!!!" screamed all the lifeguards who obsessively watch to make sure people are in tubes.  Nami quickly got in Luffy's tube and was a little freaked out by the lifeguards but who wouldn't be?

"Wow, that girl is SO cool because she's getting in trouble AND she's hanging out with FOUR GUYS, even though two of them are obviously just sixth graders." Said some random girls as they floated by and adjusted the chart so that Nami was Number Three on the list of Most Popular Girls in School.

Zoro raised an eyebrow at Sanji that said, "She's using you to up her popularity."

Sanji figured that he'd just go to Nami and get a straight answer from her.  "Nami, are you just using me to up your popularity?" Sanji asked her.

Nami could have lied to him right there and he would have believed her.  But no.  "Yes." She said plainly.  "But don't get me wrong, you're…OKAY to hang around with…though annoying sometimes…"

"So…you LIKE hanging around me with?" Sanji said as his heart went aflutter.  Zoro slapped his forehead and decided that he could no longer listen to this conversation, so he started wondering if using FOUR swords might improve his swordsmanship skills…

After traveling around the Lazy River a couple hundred more times, they all decided to get out of it and go off to do something else.  So they took their tubes back to the rental place to get two more tubes so they could house five instead of three.  Nami was smarter this time and didn't really care about money even though a double tube was cheaper, she didn't want to have to deal with Sanji asking her to go on a double tube with her.  Now, everyone would have their own tube except for Usopp and Luffy who would have to share.

They went up to the line of one of the tube slides and waited there.

"Nami, you still have a chance to go on the double tube with me." Sanji said as if Nami had been begging to do so.

"No, I think Luffy and Usopp want to go down on the double tube." Replied Nami truthfully.

Zoro thought; "This conversation is SO below me."

A little while later, they got towards the top of the slide.  This time, to avoid controversy, Nami got in between Sanji and Zoro so that there wouldn't be a, "HEY!!  YOU CUT ME!!" fight.

"Hey, YOU CUT ME!!" said Zoro angrily to Nami when she got in front of him.  Normally, Zoro is a pretty mellow guy but when it comes to cutting him, he can't handle that AT ALL.

"Nami, you cut Zoro so that you could be with me!" said Sanji.

Nami sighed and rearranged the line so that Zoro was first and Sanji was behind her.

"That's better." Said Zoro as he crossed his arms since now he was in a bad mood.

"But you're still with ME!" said Sanji.

So Nami moved Usopp and Luffy in front of Sanji.

"But I was first before…" Sanji continued to complain.  "And now I'm last… AND I'm not next to you!"

"Well…uh…" started Nami.  "I want to see you when you come down the slide and I want to make sure that I'm out of the pool and ready by the time it's your turn!" Nami lied.

"I am so first." Said Zoro.

"Really, Nami?!" Sanji said happily.

"Oh yes." Nami answered.

Then it was ZORO'S TURN!!!  He got on the slide.  Whoopee.  Then it was Nami's turn and she got on the slide too.  Then Usopp.  Then Luffy.  And then Sanji went.

"Nami, did you see me?!" Sanji yelled as he trudged through the water with his tube.

"Yes, I saw you, it was very incredible." Said Nami.  "The way you just rode that tube down the slide."

"My left eye isn't showing, is it?" Sanji said as he played with his bangs a little bit.

"You have a left eye?" said Zoro.

"Giving yourself a certain mystery makes you even more irresistible to the ladies." Said Sanji.  "Right, Nami?"

Nami rolled her eyes.  "As if you were irresistible in the first place?" Zoro felt he HAD to say.

"WHAT?!" yelled Sanji angrily , getting so much more offended than he should have as he threw his tube on the ground.  "YOU TAKE THAT BACK!!!"

Usopp took this opportunity to look at his waterproof watch to see that it was 5:30.  Time sure does fly when you're having fun!!  "This place closes in a half an hour." He reported as everyone turned around from the task they were performing whether it be fighting, looking at a bird or just standing there doing nothing.  "If we hurry, we might still be able to go on one more ride."

Everyone stared at Usopp for a second.  He was wearing…GOGGLES.  At a WATERPARK.  Who does THAT?

"But which slide should we go on?" asked no one in particular.  

By the time they decided on a slide and got to the line, they found that it had been closed off for the day.  At that point, it was now 5:50 so they had to now go back to their cabana and change into dry clothes and get all their stuff and get out of the water park.  This was, of course, only AFTER returning all the tubes to the rental place.

"Aren't those the same clothes you came here in?" Nami asked all the men except Sanji as they all exited Water Country.  Nami and Sanji and both changed their clothes into brand new attire, Zoro had simply changed out of his bathing suit and both Luffy and Usopp were still wearing their dripping wet suits.

"What are we going to do for two hours until your neighbor comes and picks us up?" Zoro asked Luffy, ignoring Nami as they all stood outside the park, watching all the cars speed by on their way out.

No sooner had he said that than they were inside a nearby Burger King.


	7. King of the Burgers!

"Wow, your neighbor really supplied us with a lot of money." Said Nami to Luffy as she flipped through the wad of currency that they had.  Sanji had taken this opportunity to go outside and smoke a butt while everyone was waiting in line to order the food.

"Yeah, she's REALLY nice!" said Luffy, but then he got distracted by the Burger King crowns.  "YAY!!  I'M GOING TO BE THE KING OF BURGERS!!!"  He ran over and grabbed a crown and put it on.

When they got to the front of the line, Nami took it upon herself to order from the teenage male who was behind the counter.  He had to provide for himself to save up for a car, so we can assume that he was a junior, or maybe even a SENIOR and if Nami could act cool in front of him, flaunting off the fact that she hangs around with guys who are OLDER than her, then her social status might even go Number Two on the list.

However, this teenage boy was NOT impressed.  Not only was she also hanging around two boys who were younger than her, but the smell of chlorine lingered on her because she had neglected to cleanse herself, considering it to be unimportant.  Also, she was at Burger King and she did NOT order one of their salads that are made especially for girls like her and guys like Sanji.  She ordered a BURGER.  At… BURGER KING.  She came very close to being moved down to Number Four on the list, but when she only took a few meek bites and threw the rest away, she was able to keep her position.

Luffy filled up his cup with a bit of each soda to make his special concoction and then fished through his Big Kid's Meal for the toy that lay hidden inside as he proudly wore not one, but TWO crowns upon his head!  He eventually found 'Wheels', the member of the Burger King Club who was in a wheelchair, even though he needed Boomer to complete his collection.

Luckily, Usopp had Boomer so they traded despite the fact that Usopp already HAD a 'Wheels'.  Sanji daintily ate his salad with his napkin in his lap as he merely observed everyone else enjoying their meals, thinking to himself that he could make a better salad with his eyes clothes.  And, if he had all the materials he required, you know he would have right then and there, awing the rest of the world with his mad skills.  As for Zoro, he inhaled his food in about five seconds, leaned back, tipped his hat over his eyes, and then fell asleep after a hard day's work of fun.

"I'm gonna go and play in the balls!" said Luffy as he dropped his half eaten burger and ran over to the play area.

"WAIT FOR ME!!!" Usopp yelled as he followed after him FAR too enthusiastically.

Sanji looked at the sleeping Zoro, then at Luffy and Usopp in the balls, and then at Nami who was just sitting there.  "Nami, it's just you and me!" he said.

"Gumdrops." Said Nami.

"Well, I have something I have to say." Said Sanji nervously.  "Remember how I asked you if you were just using me to up your popularity…?"

"Uh…yeah?" Nami said.

"And then you said that you were?"

"Yeah?"

"And then you said that you liked hanging around with me?"

"…Yeah…"

"Do you think there's any chance in there that it might be more than… LIKING?  That you might actually… oh I don't know… LOVE ME?"

"I never said that I LIKED you." Said Nami.  "Just that I liked hanging around with you.  And I don't even think I phrased it like that.  I think I said that I didn't mind hanging around with you, only because you had boosted my popularity up SO much!"

Sanji paused for a minute.

"She's using you." Zoro said from under his hat.

"SHUT UP!!!" Sanji yelled.

Just then, they heard some pounding from the play structure.  They turned around to see Usopp and Luffy with their faces pressed up against the plastic wall while making funny expressions at them.  Then they pulled away, laughed hysterically for only the LORD knows how long, and then crawled away.  The three who were slightly sane got retarded little drops and decided to ignore all that just happened.

By the time Luffy and Usopp got their fill of the play structure, it was about 7:00 AND it was dark outside.  They weren't allowed to loiter inside Burger King anymore and were kicked out, doomed to wait outside until Luffy's neighbor returned to pick them up!!  NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!

Sanji lit himself another cigarette as if there wasn't people around him who could potentially be harmed by his second hand smoke.

"When we all get home, do you guys want to come to my house for a sleepover party?" Luffy asked excitedly.

"YEAH!!" said Usopp.  "We haven't had one of those for a long time!!"

Everyone politely averted their eyes, in vain hope that maybe Luffy would just forget all about his idea.

"It'll be fun, you guys!" said Luffy.  "I could get my neighbor to go around to all of your houses so you can get your stuff and then we'll go to my house!!"

"I wouldn't want to inconvenience your neighbor." Said Sanji.

Nami and Zoro were very quick, maybe TOO quick, to agree.

"Aww…come on!" said Luffy with a sniffle.  "We could finish our pirates game and then we could watch a movie!"

"Could we make Kool-Aid?" asked Usopp eagerly.

"YEAH!!" said Luffy.  "AND WE CAN STAY UP ALL NIGHT!!!"

"I have a soccer game early tomorrow morning." Said Zoro.

"You sleep all during the day anyway so I think you'll be all caught up." Said Nami as she patted Zoro on the shoulder.  He shot her an evil glare, but she only whistled innocently.

"Well then, I guess YOU'LL be there then." He said.

"No, I don't think so." Sighed Nami.  "I'm getting too old to go to boys' houses for a sleepover, especially if it's with a bunch of other boys who are also getting older."

"Like any of us have any of those kinds of thoughts or desires." Said Zoro.

"Have you LOOKED at Sanji lately?!" Nami yelled.

At the sound of his name, Sanji immediately perked up and realized that he too had to come up for a reason why he wouldn't be able to go to the party.  "And I have to…uh…clean stuff." He said.

"Nice excuse." Said Zoro, since he was obviously feeling extremely controversial.

"It was better than yours!" Sanji snapped.

"No, mine was legitimate." Zoro pointed out.  "Yours was just blather that fell out of your mouth in the form of words."

"Look who's talking." Said Sanji.

"So it's settled!" Luffy announced.  "Sleepover party at my house!!"

"SINCE WHEN DID WE SETTLE ANYTHING?!" demanded Sanji, Zoro and Nami but Usopp just responded with a, "YAY!!" so our trio of people who are NOT sixth graders gave him an evil glare.

After MUCH argumentation, Luffy's neighbor returned to pick them up.

"None of you can have a ride home unless you sleep over!" Luffy declared.  Well, no one really wanted to walk home considering it took them many many hours to DRIVE to Water Country, so they finally came around and agreed.  They probably would have agreed to it anyway, but they just needed that extra boost of incentive.

So, all the way back, Luffy and Usopp made plans as Radio Disney blasted the exact same songs they had all listened to on the way there.  But it was okay, even though the songs were popular about five years ago, middle schoolers still thought they were cool.

Just like Luffy had promised, his wonderful neighbor drove everyone around to their houses where they could run inside and grab all their necessities for the night and then return to the car.  The neighbor dropped everyone off at Luffy's house and then drove off into the sunset, never to come back unless we need her again later.

Of course, you seem to always forget that it takes many many hours to drive from 'home' to Water Country and so forth, so by the time they got back to Luffy's house, it was time to get into pajamas, as it was TEN O'CLOCK!!!

Usually, Zoro's the type of guy who would just sleep in his boxers; but in the privacy of his own home.  Or, if he was feeling lazy, he wouldn't bother to change or even take his clothes off for that matter.  Tonight, instead, he changed into his soccer uniform and decided to sleep in THAT, so he wouldn't have very much getting ready to do in the morning.  He had an ARMY sleeping bag so it was all insolated and WARM!!  Not to mention the fact that it was camouflage which rules.

Nami had her spaghetti strap white top with Luvalot Bear on it looking really cutesy.  She had the typical pink shorts that were SO very short with 'CHEER' written on the butt.  She had a pink sleeping bag with hearts on it.

Luffy…well, does he own anything besides a red button down shirt and a pair of jeans shorts?  He was wearing that to bed.  However, it was a DIFFERENT pair, meaning that he has a red button down shirt and jeans shorts especially for sleeping in.  That's kind of messed up, no?

Usopp was wearing silkish blue pajamas with little yellow stars on them.  He also had a matching bedtime cap with a white pom pom at the end.  He carried around his Teddy with PRIDE wherever he went!  His sleeping bag was decorated with all the super heroes of the comic book world fighting crime against their appointed archrivals!  It also had a specially made zipper so it would never get stuck in the cloth and a built in pillow.

Sanji had green plaid pajama pants on and a white shirt that promoted Abercrombie and Fitch and he had, of course, a pair of brown slippers.  His sleeping bag was plain black and blank.  There was nothing noticeably special about his sleeping bag, but we all know that he paid a ridiculous amount for it at a designer store when he could have bought the very same one somewhere else for a fifth the price.

"All right, since you all forced me to come, we're going to play girl's games all night long!" Nami decided right then and there.  "First, we'll play Truth or Dare and then we'll play I've Never and then we'll braid each other's hair and paint our nails!!"

Everyone looked at her with a raised eyebrow.  Actually, Sanji had gone off to the bathroom to brush his hair and teeth and floss and use his mouthwash and all kinds of OTHER things that he had to do before he went to bed every night.  It could have taken him hours.  Usopp had already curled up in his sleeping bag and looked as though he was going to drop off any minute.  Luffy appeared as though he was sleeping, but a trained eye could tell that he was only pretending to be asleep so that he could later pretend to talk in his sleep to get a few laughs.  As for Zoro, he was still standing there holding his sleeping bag, as if he was waiting for someone else to come over and lay it out for him.  So really, no one was listening to Nami.

She sighed and rolled out her sleeping bag on her designated couch that she ALWAYS slept on.  She had a right to the couch because she was the girl.

About ten minutes later, Sanji came out of the bathroom all refreshed.  Zoro looked him up and down and when Sanji noticed that he was being looked up and down, he looked Zoro up and down as well.

"What are you looking at?" Zoro said in an annoyed tone.

"YOU were looking at ME." Sanji said.

"No I wasn't." Zoro said.

"Yes you were!" Sanji insisted.  "I came out of the bathroom just now and you were standing here looking me up and down for no reason!"

"No, you came out of the bathroom and started looking at ME up and down for no reason!" Zoro argued.

"Are you trying to start something?!" Sanji demanded, rolling up his sleeves.

"You asked for it!" Zoro said, dropping his sleeping bag.

"SHUT UP!!!" yelled Nami rather loudly as she ran over and konked them both on the head.

In this process, she accidentally knocked them both unconscious.  Usopp was asleep by this time and Luffy had accidentally fallen asleep as well so now Nami was AAAALLLLLLLLLLL alone.  But then she fell asleep in a second anyway because their middle school metabolisms wouldn't let them stay up past 10:30 though they wanted to ever so much.


	8. Keeper Mihawk and Principal Zeff

The next morning, they were awakened by the lights flickering on and off.  Upon wiping the sleep from their eyes, they found Ace standing over them with his hand on the light switch.  "Uh…Zoro, your coach just called here wondering where you were." He said.

Then they had to wake up Zoro.

"Zoro, your coach just called." Ace repeated.

"Oh." Said Zoro.

"Your game is going to start in ten minutes and he says that you were supposed to be there twenty minutes ago."

"Oh." Zoro said with a nod.  "Then maybe I should get going then."

"Hey guys, let's all go to Zoro's game!" said Nami.  The other people raised an eyebrow at Nami.  Secretly, she knew that there would be plenty of high school bound boys on Zoro's team who could see her standing there rooting for Zoro and if that wouldn't boost her popularity level, she didn't know what would.

"Yeah, that would be fun!" Luffy suddenly agreed.

"I've never been to an athletic event before…" said Usopp, scratching his chin.  The three looked at Sanji only to find that he wasn't there.  He had already ventured off to the bathroom to groom and dress himself.  So they all decided that Sanji would be going with them whether he liked it or not because he wasn't there to contribute his opinion on the matter.

They all hastily dressed themselves and actually had to wait for Sanji to finish even though he had gone in there FIRST!!  Today, he sported white slacks, a striped button down shirt and a black leather-ish type jacket even though it was quite warm outside.  Nami put on her scanty pink clothing that she had packed and put her hair into two braids.  Usopp was wearing his Anikan Skywalker shirt where there was Little Anikan walking and his shadow was an Evil Darth Vader looming down on him.  Luffy was… well, I guess he was wearing the exact same thing he always wears and Zoro was wearing his soccer uniform that was, most unfortunately for him, orange so kids on the team sometimes called him 'Oompa Loompa' when he screwed up a play.

The five got on their bikes (except Usopp who had a scooter) and made their way down to the local field as fast as they could.  They arrived just as Zoro's orange team began their stretches.

"WHERE WERE YOU?!" yelled Johnny, the left wing as Zoro nonchalantly walked over as if he wasn't absurdly late.

"WE WERE AFRAID YOU WOULDN'T SHOW!!!" Yosaku, the right wing, screamed as he barely suppressed the urge to grab Zoro's shoulders and shake him around violently.

"CAPTAINS!!" shouted the referee as he stood in the middle of the field.  Since Zoro is the captain and all, he walked to where the referee and the captain of the red team stood waiting for him.  "All right, captains, shake hands and introduce yourselves."

"I'mZoro." Said Zoro, putting his hand out.

The captain on the other team was the goalie.  He put his hand out and shook Zoro's.  "Juraquille Mihawk." He said casually.

"Call it." Said the ref as he flipped a coin up in the air.

"Heads." Said Zoro.  The coin landed, and it was TAILS!  Zoro glared at that goalie, that MIHAWK, as if it was his fault that the coin had landed on the side he hadn't called.

"All right, the Red Team kicks off." Said the ref.  "The game will start in about five minutes."

The two captains eyed each other as they walked away from the center back to their appointed teams.

"Who is that kid?" Zoro asked Johnny and Yosaku.

"Oh, you mean that goalie?" said Johnny as shivers went down his spine.

"He hasn't been scored on all year." Yosaku continued.  "No matter how good the team is that they're playing against, they just can't get a goal no matter what so that's why this team is undefeated."

"No goals at all?" Zoro said, intrigued.

"I'm sure YOU'LL be able to score on him, Zoro." Said Johnny.  "You're our leading goal scorer."

Meanwhile, our other friends had stolen a soccer ball from the bag and were now frolicking about with it even though they didn't really know how to use it, which is kind of funny since a ball is something you'd figure that EVERYONE knows how to use considering that they give it to children to play with at a young age.

"Let's play a game!" said Sanji.  "It's called 'Kick and Run'."

"How do you play?" asked Luffy.

"Well, I kick the ball as hard as I can and then everyone else runs after it and whoever gets it first gets to kick it next." Sanji replied.

"YEAH!!" Usopp and Luffy yelled as their eyes turned into shining stars.  Sanji then punted the ball all the way across the field to the baseball diamonds and the two sixth graders were gone in seconds.

Nami sighed and shook her head.  "Nami!" said Sanji.  "Now it's just you and me!"

"Look, the game is starting!" Nami said, turning around.

The game started and, despite the fact that the Orange Team had many opportunities, that kid…that goalie…that MIHAWK, managed to save every shot and dish it back out to his players quickly and skillfully.  He didn't even seem to be getting tired at all.  And, most unfortunately, the players on the Red Team were able to thwart the Orange Team's defense and sneak a goal in early into the second half.

When there was about a minute left, everything seemed hopeless for the thus far undefeated Orange Team.  But then, one of the boys on the Red Team tripped Zoro as he was going in for a shot, which resulted in a penalty shot.

"No pressure, Zoro." Said the Coach as he started to strategize with Zoro.  "But if you don't score this goal then we lose.  If you do score, we tie and then we go onto a shootout to break the tie.  You're our best shooter on the team and I know you can do it."

"I will, Coach." Said Zoro, getting all passionate.

Everything seemed to go in slow motion as the ref set the ball down on the appropriate spot and Zoro approached it as if he was walking through the clouds in Armageddon.  Mihawk took his goalie ready stance as Zoro took a few steps backwards.  He couldn't miss this shot.  He had to score.

So, using every concentrating fiber in his being, Zoro ran in and took the shot, low to the left corner.  Mihawk seemed to already be there before he had even kicked it and saved it without even having to dive.

Zoro was shocked as the Red Team cheered for their keeper.

"It's all right," said Johnny as the ref blew the whistle to end the game.  "It was bound to happen.  We were going to lose a game sooner or later."

"How could I have missed that shot?!" Zoro yelled angrily.

"Boys, line up to shake hands!" said the coach.  Zoro, extremely infuriated and frustrated, got to the back of the line and was the bitter type who didn't make eye contact with the other players and simply stuck his hand out there for someone else to slap.  Finally, he reached the end of the other line where Mihawk was standing.

"You have good potential." Said Mihawk.  "Don't give up.  I would like to play against you again someday."

"I will score against you next time." Zoro said.

"Maybe so." Said Mihawk as he walked away ominously.

Zoro only watched him go and celebrate with the rest of his team.  The orange team walked away sadly as if it was really that big of a deal that they had lost some random game.  That's when Sanji and Nami came over to him.

"Nice game Zoro!" said Nami who was in a very good mood since she knew she was well down the road to Number Two.

"How can you say that?!" demanded Zoro.  "We LOST!"

"You still played well." Said Nami nervously.

"Next time, I will score on him!" Zoro said, slamming his fist into his palm.  "He won't make a mockery of me the next time we play the Red Team!  I'm saying right here and now that I won't lose another game until I am good enough to challenge him again!"

"Zoro, it's not really that big of a deal." Said Sanji.

"What would YOU know?!" yelled Zoro angrily.

"I used to play soccer when I was younger." Sanji replied.

"Yeah right." Zoro said as if it was really all that far fetched.

"It's true!" Sanji insisted.  "I started when I was about…seven…I believe."

"When did you stop playing?" asked Nami.

"Halfway through the season." Sanji answered.

"You don't know ANYTHING about what I'm going through!" yelled Zoro.  "We were undefeated and because of me, we are now… DEFEATED!!"

"Yes but wasn't it YOU who kept your team from being defeated throughout the earlier season?" Sanji reminded him.

"What does it matter now?" Zoro said pessimistically.  "We're defeated now."  They all stood there in silence for a minute.  "Where's Luffy and Usopp?"

"Playing Kick and Run." Sanji said, pointing at Usopp and Luffy who were savagely wrestling on the ground to get the ball from each other.  So, after sufficiently humoring them by playing a few more rounds of Kick and Run, they finally got back on their bikes or scooter and made their way back to their homes.  Sanji invited them all over to test a new recipe for a special drink he had formulated the other day so they stopped at his house.

"Hey, whose car is this?" Sanji wondered out loud, looking at an unfamiliar car as they all went into his house.

When he opened the door, he gasped.  Everyone else tried to peek over his shoulders to see why he was gasping but he was taller than all of them so they peeked under his arms instead.

"Principal Zeff!" Sanji exclaimed in a distressed tone as he saw the peg legged principal of his old private school, Baratie, sitting right there in his house.  "What are you doing here?!"

"I came early this morning and have been waiting for quite some time." Principal Zeff replied.  "I've come to discuss some very important issues with you."

"Who's he?" asked Luffy.

"My old principal." Sanji replied as he gestured for everyone to come in.

"I'll cut right to the chase." Principal Zeff said.  "The other professors and I have decided that it was an unfair thing to do to kick you out of Baratie.  You were one of our best students and clearly just had a bad few days.  So, simply, we would like to invite you back."

"WHAT?!" yelled everyone.

"But I can't!" said Sanji.

"Many of the professors and students have missed you." Principal Zeff continued as if Sanji wasn't so very distressed.  "So we would like you to start the school year with us."

"Principal Zeff, you don't understand!" said Sanji.  "I WANTED to be kicked out of Baratie!"

"Yeah, we helped him!" added Luffy.

"I want to go to a public school!" Sanji continued.  "It's my dream to go to high school!"

"But Sanji, you can't get as good an education in a public school as you can get in a private one." Principal Zeff said.  "You BELONG in Baratie."

"Are you saying we're stupid?" Zoro said with a raised eyebrow.  Principal Zeff only looked at Zoro, but didn't say anything.

"But Principal Zeff, they do teach well in public schools." Sanji tried very hard to explain.  "For one thing, they've all been learning to read and write since they were in elementary school!"

"Haven't you been?" said Usopp.

"No, in Baratie, we teach the children to read in seventh grade." Principal Zeff answered.

"Oh…so that's why you suck at reading." Said Zoro.

"SHUT UP!!" yelled Sanji.

"Yeah, only two years of reading…wow!" said Luffy.  "And then you came into a school of kids who all knew how to read!"

"I always wondered why you always had special classes while we all went to Language Arts." Zoro said.

"Look, I'm sorry I brought it up!" Sanji said, annoyed.

"What CAN you read?" asked Nami.

"Short words and short sentences!" Sanji yelled.  "Now can we PLEASE get back to more important things?!" he pointed at Principal Zeff who was drinking tea.

"Oh right." Said Principal Zeff, putting down his dainty little teacup.  "I think your return to Baratie will prove to be a very joyous one!  All your friends miss you!"

"But I have friends at my public school!" Sanji said.

"Don't be silly, how can you POSSIBLY have already made friends in a few month's time?" chuckled Principal Zeff.  "I am the principal, Sanji.  Don't you want to get into a good college?"

"Well…yes…but…" started Sanji.

"How are you going to get into a college if you don't know how to read?" said Zoro.

"I CAN READ!!!" yelled Sanji.

"What, did they teach you how to cook instead of how to read?" Zoro asked.

"You listen here, Sanji CAN'T go back to Baratie!" said Luffy righteously.  "He has to go to high school with us!  And when he's a junior and I'm a freshmen, we'll both be in high school together and then he can give me a ride to school in his car since he'll know how to drive by then!"

It was silent.

"Right, Sanji?" said Luffy.

"Uh…yeah…" Sanji said, avoiding eye contact.  Now, he would certainly look silly as a junior driving a freshman around in his car, but that was a long time from now and maybe Luffy would forget by then.

"Sanji, if you know what's best for you, then you'll come back to Baratie." Said Principal Zeff as he stood up.  "I expect you there on Monday to take the entrance exam."

Then he walked out the door.  Sanji stood there with his head low.

"What's the problem?" asked Nami.  "Just don't go."

"I can't just NOT GO!" said Sanji.

"I'll talk to him!" Luffy declared as he marched out the door and slammed it behind him.

The four of them were quiet for a minute.  "Besides, how are you going to take an entrance exam if you don't even know how to read it?" Zoro asked.  No one really could tell if he was just trying to be annoying or if he was genuinely confused.  But Sanji didn't care and he and Zoro started feudin' right then and there.

Meanwhile, outside with Principal Zeff, Luffy had caught up with him just as he had climbed into his car.  "Hey, why are you forcing Sanji to go back to the private school?" Luffy asked.  "He's always wanted to go to high school."

"Everyone wants to go to high school, boy." Said Principal Zeff.  "Even _I _wanted to go to high school.  But there are just some kids who are too special for high school and need to be in a private one with smaller classes.  That's why I established Baratie for all children like that."

"Sanji's not like that." Said Luffy.

"Sanji is one of our PRIZE students!" said Principal Zeff, wiping a tear from his eye.  "We hated for him to leave, so that is why we wanted him back!"

"But hasn't he ever ranted to you about 'All School'?" Luffy asked.  "He tells us about it all the time."

"Of course, I'm the one who told him about it!" said Principal Zeff.  "He and I share the same dream!"

Luffy was pretty confused at that point.  "So…why are you forcing him to come back to Baratie?" he asked.  "Are you just bitter because you didn't go to a public high school and want to make sure that other people share the same misery as you?"

"I know very well that Sanji will not come back to Baratie on Monday." Said Principal Zeff as he closed the door.  "But it was worth a try."

With that, he pulled out of the driveway and drove away.

Luffy stood there for a minute and then shrugged.  He went back into the house and found Sanji and Zoro still feudin' and Usopp and Nami there as if nothing had happened at all.

Sanji looked up from his feud.  "What did he say?" he asked.

"I thought you were gonna make me a special drink!!" Luffy complained as he wandered into the kitchen.

"Hey, you have to tell me what he said!" Sanji yelled, running after him.

The other three shrugged and went into the kitchen where Sanji continued to nag Luffy to tell him what happened but Luffy would have none of it until he got a special drink.  So Sanji started making the special drinks that were so advertised.

"How come they don't teach the kids how to read?" Zoro whispered to Nami when Sanji went off to the pantry.

"Just shut up about that!" said Nami angrily since she was sick of hearing about it too.

"So what are we gonna do after this, guys?" asked Usopp to the gang as Sanji returned and began making special drinks.

"We should play pirates." Said Luffy.

"We already played pirates." Said Nami because she REALLY didn't want to play pirates again.

"But that was yesterday." Luffy pointed out.  "We haven't played pirates today.  We should play pirates today.  And besides, we didn't REALLY play pirates, we just assigned roles to later play pirates."

"Luffy, no one wants to play pirates." Said Zoro.

"I do!" said Luffy.

"I want to play pirates." Said Usopp.

"Well, everyone who matters doesn't want to play pirates." Zoro corrected himself because he knew that HE WAS GOING TO HIGH SCHOOL IN JUST A COUPLE OF MONTHS!!!

"Maybe we could rent a movie." Suggested Sanji.

"Yeah!" said Luffy.  "And we could make popcorn!"

"What movie?" Nami wondered.

"A PIRATE movie!!" Luffy announced.

"Shut up about the pirates!" yelled Zoro.

"Oh, how about Pirates of the Caribbean?" Nami sighed, thinking about her beloved Johnny Depp and Orlando Bloom.  She would just DIE if she were to suddenly discover that Leonardo DiCaprio was in the movie as well.  She didn't really care if the movie had any plot whatsoever, just as long as it had a bunch guys that she could obsess over even though they would never ever go for a seventh grade girl.

"No, now pirates just offend me." Zoro said.

"How can pirates offend you?" asked Luffy.  "They're so cool."

"When I get older, I'm going to make it my sole purpose in life to just kill them all." Zoro declared even though it was just to get under Luffy's skin.

"You better not kill Johnny Depp!" swooned Nami.

There was silence for a minute.  "Okay, so let's all pool our money together to rent a movie." Usopp said, reaching into his pockets and searching for all the money he might have.

"That should be enough!" said Nami, counting all the money that was now in the middle of the table.  "Let's go!"

"What about my special drinks?" Sanji cried.

"Oh right." Said Nami.  They all folded their hands politely and waited patiently for Sanji to finish making them their special drinks.  Then, when he was finished, they all drank them and enjoyed them QUITE well.  Just when they were all about to dart out the door to get on their bikes again, Sanji told them to wait because he had to clean the glasses and dry them and put them away too.  When he was finally done with THAT, everyone went outside to board their bikes or scooters and then had a race all the way down to Icbool's Temple, the local video renting place.


	9. Movies and Experiments

"All right!" said Usopp as he ran over and grabbed Pirates of the Caribbean and held it triumphantly above his head.  "The last copy is all ours!"

"I'll be taking that." Came a voice above him as someone plucked the video out of his hand.  Everyone looked up to see someone who could only be a gang of eleventh graders standing above them holding the video.

"Hey, we got that first!" said Nami.

"Well…let's do out the math here." Said the leader of them all who was holding the video.  He had ridiculous facial hair and a horrible haircut as well as sunglasses that only an eleventh grader would think were cool.  "We're eleventh graders, and you're all in middle school."

"That doesn't give you the right to take our video!" said Luffy.

"Uh, yeah it does." Said the leader as his friends gawfed on cue.  "I'm gonna be a senior next year which means I'm the highest on the food chain so what are you guys gonna do about it?"

Our five friends looked at each other.  They couldn't very well argue with a senior.  That would just be getting themselves into more trouble than it was worth.

"Aw man, I really wanted to watch that movie…" sighed Usopp as the bell rang and more people came into the video renting place.

"Usopp!" cheered Kaya, who had just come in the store.  She ran over to him as if the mere fact that he was there made her day.  "Merry's waiting for me out the car so I can only be a minute.  What movie are you renting?"

"Well…we were GOING to rent Pirates of the Caribbean but…" started Usopp.

"Wow!" said Kaya.  "I was going to rent that movie too!"

"Well too bad!" said the mean eleventh grader.  "Because me and MY friends got the last copy!"

"That's not nice!" said Kaya.

"It's all right, Kaya, we'll just pick out a different movie." Said Usopp.

"Yeah!" said Sanji.  "It doesn't matter!  We can see that movie some other time."

"Aww…" said Luffy and Nami sadly.

"Hey guys, how about this movie?" said Zoro, holding up one of the black and white videos from the foreign film section.  "Actually, no.  It's got subtitles and I would hate to have to read them out loud to Sanji since he can't read and all."

"HEY!!!" yelled Sanji.  "YOU DID THAT ON PURPOSE!!!"

"How about 'Finding Nemo'?" Luffy said, jumping between them before they could kill each other with the Finding Nemo video in hand.  "I don't think there's a point in THIS movie where you need to be able to read to follow it."

"I can READ, just not very well!" Sanji HOLL-ered.

"But there aren't any hot guys in Finding Nemo." Said Nami.  "How about Ten Things I Hate About You?"

Everyone raised an eyebrow at her.

"Guys, let's rent Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets!!" Usopp yelled as he barreled through them all and ran to the front desk area without consulting anyone.  But they decided to agree since Harry Potter was okay to watch, just not to buy or wear any merchandise for.

"You're total comes to $35 dollars." Said the eleventh grader behind the front desk who worked there.  He was wearing some glasses and the work place uniform, with a nametag that said, 'Kuro'.

"$35?" said Nami.  "Isn't that a bit high?"

"No, that's what the price says." Said Kuro.

"Well, I want to see it then." Nami said.

"No," said Kuro.  "And just for that, I'm gonna make you pay double."

"SEVENTY DOLLARS?!" screamed Luffy.

"You can't do that!" said Zoro who was JUST as appalled but expressed it in a far different way.

"We don't have that much money!" said Sanji.

"Then give me everything you've got." Said Kuro as he leaned over the counter.

"No, we're just not going to rent a movie here, then." Said Usopp.  "Come on, Kaya!"

They turned around only to be faced with the eleventh graders who had stolen their movie from before.  "Jango, take care of them." Said Kuro.

"My pleasure!" said Jango, the leader of the gang, as he pounded one fist into his palm.  "You stupid middle schoolers are gonna give up all your money whether you like it or not so just hand it over peacefully!"

"Don't be afraid, Kaya!" said Usopp.

"No, this isn't right!" said Kaya.  "I can pay the seventy dollars for the tape if you want!  Just don't hurt my friends!"

It was then that Zoro discreetly leaned over to Sanji and whispered, "Do we even know her?"

"What, is that pocket change to you?" Kuro said, looking out the window to see the limo with Merry sitting there foolishly in the driver's seat.  "How much more money do you have?"

"Hey, leave her alone!" said Usopp.

"Yeah, who do you think you are, getting her involved?!" Luffy demanded.

"It's not like she's SPECIAL or anything, we do this all the time!" laughed Jango foolishly.  "We're the Black Cat Gang!"

"YEAH!!" cheered the random people who don't have names.

"Now hand over the money!" said Kuro.

Kaya began to fumble for her money but Usopp stepped in front.  "I refuse to allow this!" he declared.

"And what are you going to do about it?" said Kuro.

"WE'RE going to put a stop to it!" said Luffy.

"We are?" said Sanji.

"Can you at least read numbers?" Zoro asked.

"IT'S NOT LIKE I CAN'T READ!!!" screamed Sanji, getting very frustrated.

It was a very long, drawn out squabble that lasted to the equivalent of about ten episodes, but in the end, the Black Cat Gang was smote and our favorite middle schoolers rose above.

"Oh man oh man oh man oh man!!" panted Usopp as he and everyone else ran out of the store with their Pirates of the Caribbean tape.  They had, of course, left the proper amount of money on the counter table and had every intention of returning it so the manager wouldn't ban them from the rental place after he found the steaming heap of numerous bodies in his movie-renting store.  "I can't believe we just beat up a bunch of high schoolers!"

"They weren't hard at all!" laughed Luffy.

"Bye Usopp!" said Kaya as she waved to Usopp and his friends as they got on their bikes and scooters.  She had decided to rent Romeo and Juliet: starring Leonardo DiCaprio instead of Pirates of the Caribbean since there was only one copy left and all.

"Let's go back to my house!" Luffy suggested.  They all pedaled furiously until they got back to Luffy's house and threw a party for their monumental accomplishment, even though it wasn't really a monumental accomplishment.

"What's this movie about anyway?" Sanji asked as he sat down on the couch in front of the television.  "I mean, I assume it's about some pirates in the Caribbean, but I never saw it before."

"Why don't you just look at the summary on the back…?" started Zoro as he trailed off and picked up the box.  "Never mind.  I'll read it for you."

"STOP THAT!!!" yelled Sanji.

"Fine, I won't." Said Zoro as he tossed the empty box at Sanji.  Sanji picked it up and ran over to the bathroom where he could read the box in peace, no matter how long it took him.

Luffy went to make popcorn but that was, of course, a disaster without Sanji around.  Or anyone else around for that matter.  He simply took the popcorn out of the pantry and put it in the microwave without taking off the plastic wrapping or unfolding it.  He didn't really set it on any specific time, either, he just pressed a few buttons and ran off so he wouldn't miss any of the movie.

About five seconds later, everyone smelled burning and they all ran over with a fire extinguisher and pretty much destroyed the entire half of the kitchen.

It was very depressing because they thought, at first, that they would have no popcorn with their movie but luckily, Sanji had finished reading the box and had now emerged from the lavatory!  So then he took kernels and actually made them on the stove with a pan and melted the butter and everything!  They were much better that way.

They were watching peacefully for a moment.  Suddenly, Zoro leaned over to Sanji and pointed at the screen.  "That says, 'Pirates of the Caribbean'." He said just as the title came up.

Sanji glared angrily and vengefully at Zoro and plotted many deaths.  Well, maybe not many deaths, just a single death of ZORO!!  Maybe he was thinking of many deaths… as in many creative DIFFERENT deaths for Zoro but not of more than one person.

Not to be abrupt or anything, but then they watched the movie.  It was very great and fun and stuff, but then they decided that they would be playing video games.

"I get to be the first controller since it's my house!" said Luffy.

"But there's only four controllers!" complained Nami.  "And you guys always leave me out just because I'm a girl and video games is a boy thing!"

No one was really listening to her.  They were all fighting over who got to be first player and who would be stuck with the controller with the screwed up joystick.  Eventually, Usopp got the Gatorade controller AND ended up being forth player too.

So, they all sat there holding their controllers for a moment.  "Okay…what should we play?" asked Sanji.

"How about Street Fighter?!" Luffy yelled excitedly.

"YEAH!!!" cheered all the men as manly as they could.  Of course, this was some Nintendo Gamecube upgrade of the Sega Genesis Street Fighter II so you could play four-way just like in Super Smash Brothers.

"I'M BEING THE STRETCHY GUY!!" screamed Luffy as he took the stretchy guy before anyone else could.  It's not like they WANTED the stretchy guy, though, because he was a knave.

"You mean Dhalsim, right?" said Usopp since he's the kind of kid to memorize all the names and histories and weights and moves and all that other crap about each character.  But it's not like he was very good at playing it but he DID know all the special moves!

"I didn't know he had a name!" said Luffy.

"You're so annoying when you're him." Said Sanji.  "All you do is stand in the corner and stretch and punch and stuff."

"So?" said Luffy.  "If I could stretch, I'd do that all the time."

"What, stretch and punch and stuff?" said Zoro.

"Yeah." Said Luffy.  "Or just stretch."

"Well, I'm being Chun Li." Said Sanji.

"She's a girl." Said Usopp.

"So?" Sanji said.  "She's got a good kicking special move.  Besides, she's cute!"

"Dude, she's a video game character." Said Zoro.

"Dude, she's still hot." Said Sanji.

"Dude, if you get turned on by that kind of stuff." Zoro said.

"Dude, shut up." Said Sanji.

"Dude, at least I can read." Zoro said with a PA-CHA.

"Dude, at least I'm not an Oompa Loompa!" said Sanji.

"Don't say, 'dude', it doesn't sound natural coming from you." Said Zoro.  But then he thought about what Sanji had just said and looked down to see that he was still wearing his orange soccer uniform.  "Aw man." He said somewhat sadly.

"Ha ha!" said Sanji as he pulled out a little notepad and his fuzzy purple yearbook signing pen.  "Sanji: 1!  Zoro:…NOTHING!"

"What are you talking about?" asked Nami.  "Zoro's been getting the best of you all day."

"Well, not on MY tally sheet." Sanji insisted.

"I wouldn't trust any tally sheet made by someone who doesn't know how to read." Zoro commented.  "You know, those pesky Z's and S's… they kind of look the same.  You know what I'm talking about, right Sanji?  I admit it.  I used to write my Z's and S's backwards when I was about…six."

"Zoro, I swear if you say one more thing about…!" started Sanji but Nami grabbed him.

"You just have to learn how to ignore him." She said.

"YES SIR!" said Sanji, saluting her.

"Well I'M gonna be Vega." Said Usopp, choosing his character.

"Vega's a girl too." Zoro pointed out.

"No he isn't!!" yelled Usopp as if he was offended.

"Let's have a vote." Said Zoro.  "If you think Vega is a girl, raise your hand."  Everyone raised their hands except for Usopp.

"IT'S NOT TRUE!!" said Usopp passionately.  "Vega is a man!!"

"Whatever you say, Usopp." Said everyone as they averted eye contact.

Then the game commenced.  Everyone had their various styles of play.  Sanji would just button mash the controller and it was probably his fault that the Gatorade controller was broken but he wasn't about to admit it.  Usopp knew how to do all the special moves but couldn't seem to complete them.  Any of them.  Zoro knew all the special moves, but he knew how to do them all even though he didn't sit in the corner reading the cheat book religiously like his holy bible like Usopp did.  As for Luffy, he just stood in the corner and stretched.  If Nami, on the off chance, ever did get a turn while someone was going to the bathroom, she would just sit down and pretend to not know how to play even though she had that very game at home.

7:00 on Sunday nights usually symbolized the time in which everyone would return to their homes to do their homework.  However, today was special because none of them had homework, considering that tomorrow was the second to last day of school.  As a matter of fact, they weren't even allowed to bring in anything except for their yearbooks, a pen for signing and a camera.

So, now that it was 7:00 on a Sunday night and they all had no homework… they didn't know how to spend their time.  All activity just sort of stopped and they all stared at each other for a minute.


	10. The Fire

THE NEXT MORNING!!!

It was precious the next morning.  Actually, it was an EXTREMELY precious the next morning and, as Luffy frolicked off to the bus stop with a pen and his construction paper yearbook in hand, he sang a ridiculous song about how precious the day was.

You see, Luffy's not the kind of kid to think about the fact that it was mean and evil to force the entire student body to come back to school on a Monday to have the last day of school.  Luffy was just thinking about the precious day.  Well, I guess he was singing about the precious day too.  But he wasn't singing about how he had to go back to school on a Monday for the last day of school.  He was actually singing about the precious day, as we have reiterated a thousand times.

He was the first at the bus stop today, and he waited patiently for all his friends to get there.  He had NO idea why he hadn't asked them all to sign his yearbook the day before while they all had been at his house, but now he would get all their signatures TODAY!!

From up the street, he saw one of his buddies!  It was Zoro!  Here to sign his yearbook!

"ZORO!!" yelled Luffy as he ran towards Zoro, unable to wait until he reached the bus stop.  "YOU MUST SIGN MY YEARBOOK!!!"

"Uhh…" Zoro said, a little freaked out that Luffy was attacking him so.  But Luffy wouldn't let Zoro pass until he had the signed his book.  So Zoro took his pen, opened it up to a random page since there was no picture of himself to sign across and then signed his name.

"Wow!" marveled Luffy.  "My first middle school yearbook signature!  Can I sign yours too, Zoro?!"

"I didn't bring mine." Zoro confessed as he walked past Luffy on his way to the bus stop.

"Why not?!" Luffy whined, following after him.

"I didn't feel like carrying it around." Zoro replied truthfully, because he didn't even know that he would later regret that the only signature in his yearbook was Sanji's.

Luffy's bombarding process pretty much repeated itself when Usopp came around the corner dressed in his best outfit for the last day of school.  He, in the confusion of trying to get Kaya an eighth grade yearbook that she deserved so, had forgotten to sign hers or allow her to sign his.  He also sported his spinny tie as well so that all the ladies would be won over and would want to sign his yearbook.

"Now I have…TWO signatures in my book!" Luffy said as he read Usopp's short little note and signature about three hundred times at lightning speed.

Nami was next.  Even though Luffy was jumping up and down and begging her to sign his yearbook, she had to hike up her skirt, apply her make-up and change into high-healed shoes.

"Hold this." She said to Zoro, handing him the pocket mirror.

Zoro hardly refrained himself from telling her that he KNEW he had to hold it and she didn't need to tell him.  But then he remembered that this would be the last time this year that he would have to hold this mirror for her and he might as well just put up with it for now.

So Nami signed Luffy's yearbook, but suddenly became deaf when Luffy asked to sign hers.  What kind of Third Most Popular Girl in School would she be if she got a sixth grader to sign her yearbook?  Unless she was going for every signature in the school, but she just didn't feel like doing that because she didn't want anybody from the Loser Group in her yearbook.  After all, ten years in the future, all of this would matter so she didn't want to ruin it for herself!

"I'm so glad this is the last day of school!" Nami exclaimed.  "Then we have the WHOLE summer in front of us!  This'll be a blast."

"Uh…huh." Said Zoro.

"You're not excited?" Nami said, looking puzzled.

"I am." Said Zoro.

"…Right…" said Nami uneasily.  Sometimes, she wished there were some other people at her bus stop.  Some other seventh graders.  Some other girls.  ANYONE else.  And today was one of those days.  And she wished and wished with all her might, especially as Sanji came strolling into view.

Actually, he wasn't strolling like he usually was.  He was walking briskly.

"Guys, I saw the bus drive by from outside my window." He said.  "It came early today for some reason!"

"I have NEVER missed the bus before!" said Usopp, looking distressed.

"We're just going to have to walk if we want to be on time today." Said Zoro.

"WHAT?!" yelled Nami.  "I REFUSE to walk to school in these heels!!"

"So you're going to miss school and look back at your seventh grade yearbook and see no signatures?" said Luffy.

Nami looked angry for a moment.  "FINE!" she said as if people had been begging her to come.  "But only because you're all begging me to come!"

"But it's so FAR!" said Usopp.  "We don't have any supervision!  We could get kidnapped!"

"No one's gonna kidnap YOU." Said Sanji.

"Let's go guys!" said Luffy.  "I don't want to be late!"

And with that, the herd started their migration.  They had gotten no less than two hundred feet down the street when a giant yellow bus suddenly passed them.

They stood there in awe and silence for a moment as they watched the bus disappear down the road.

"That wouldn't be our bus, now would it?" said Zoro, looking at Sanji with an annoyed expression.

"That's strange!" said Sanji.  "Oh, I know.  I must have seen the high school bus out my window and mistaken it for our bus."

"You…stupid…illiterate dumbass." Said Zoro, shaking his head.

"HEY!!" yelled Usopp.  "DON'T USE THAT LANGUAGE!!"

"What did you just call me?!" Sanji demanded.

"A dumbass?" Zoro said.

"No, BEFORE that!"

"…Stupid?"

"No, AFTER that!"

"Illiterate?"

"All right, that was completely uncalled for!" said Sanji, dropping his yearbook on the ground.  "Not only is it not entirely true, but it's not appropriate for this situation because my level of reading skills is irrelevant to the fact that I mistook the high school bus for the middle school bus!"

"It is SO relevant." Said Zoro.

"Sanji, just don't let it bother you." Said Nami when she noticed the smoke puffing out of Sanji's ears.

"But he's just bringing it up too much!" said Sanji in a voice that sounded like a whine.  "I'm very sensitive about it!  That's why I didn't tell you guys!"

"We're going to be late for school…" Usopp complained.

"Maybe we can wait for the elementary bus and ask them to take us to the middle school." Said Zoro.

"But…we'll still be late." Said Usopp, looking slightly confused.

"Yeah…but we won't have to walk." Zoro said.

"Let's just GO guys!" said Nami, sounding exasperated.  The five of them continued their walking.  It's not like their middle school was terribly far away, probably about a mile away or so but it's STILL annoying.

"So, Sanji, I was worried that you were going to go to Baratie!" said Luffy.  "And I was ESPECIALLY worried because you were last to the bus stop but not really since you're ALWAYS last to the bus stop!"

"Well, since Principal Zeff was obviously giving me the choice, I decided that I wouldn't be going back!" Sanji declared, feeling mutinous.  "Aren't you so happy for me, Nami?"

"Er…I guess." Said Nami with a nonchalant shrug.

At one point, they had to walk past the one street in town that had all the rich, huge houses on it.

"Only really rich people can live in those houses." Said Nami.  You see, people walk by huge houses and almost MAKE FUN OF THEM, even though, deep down inside, everyone wants to live in them.  "I mean, who needs a house that big?  What do they do with all that space?  It's pointless."

"I hear that that house has eight bathrooms…but only four people in the family." Said Luffy, pointing to one of the houses.

"That house's garage is bigger than my house!" said Sanji.

"I think that's the guesthouse." Said Nami.

"Then it offends me even more!" Sanji declared.

"No one needs a house that big!" said Zoro.

"I guess if you have the money…" sighed Nami.

"Yeah, even the money needs a bathroom." Said Luffy.  And he thought this whole idea was HILARIOUS!  And laughed at the thought of a giant quarter using a toilet.

"If I was rich, I'd use my money for something good." Said Sanji.  "I wouldn't spend it all on making a huge house or buying a bunch of cars."

"Rich people are just selfish." Said Nami.

"Yeah, they suck." Zoro agreed.

"Hey guys!" said Usopp.  "I just remembered that Kaya lives on this street!"

What followed thus was a very awkward silence.

"Oh." Said Sanji.  "We didn't realize that Kaya was…well…you know."

With that, they made their way through the rich neighborhood and to the school.  There were still kids hanging around outside in the front, so they knew that the second bell hadn't rung yet because there are no middle schoolers who would ever hang out after the second bell had rung, even if they were high school bound eighth graders.

But it was only minutes until the second bell, so they had to move quickly to their homeroom classes.

Zoro and Sanji reached homeroom with time to spare!

"So…do you have your special language arts class today?" Zoro asked Sanji.

Instead of answering and getting angry, Sanji spun around and sat there in a huff.  But Zoro was still satisfied because he could tell Sanji was mad, so in his opinion, he had still won.

The homeroom class was just about to start exchanging their yearbooks when suddenly; a familiar sound rang through the air!  It wasn't the bell that told them to go to their next class, for it was FAR too early for such a thing to be ringing!  It was, in fact, THE FIRE ALARM!!

It wasn't a drill either.  As the entire school was evacuated, it was easy to see the smoke rising from a corner of the school.  The fire trucks arrived at the school and our favorite little people with hoses came out and started fighting that fire!

Usopp ran up to Zoro, Sanji, Luffy and Nami since they were all standing together.  "Oh my god, guys!" he yelled.  He had toilet paper on his shoe.  "I was in the bathroom and suddenly I smelled smoke and then I looked up and saw that there WAS smoke!!  I was in the very bathroom that the fire started in!  And you know what?!  I don't think it was just an accident!!"

"Fires don't just START." Said Nami.

"I know!" said Usopp.  "But I just wish I had caught a glimpse of the person who started it."

Everyone was having just a grand ol' time watching the spectacle, when the principal, Dr. Kong, suddenly came up from behind them.  

"Young man," said Dr. Kong, putting a hand on Zoro's shoulder.  "May I have a word with you over there?"

Zoro looked up at the principal and then shrugged.  "Sure." He said as he followed the principal away from all the other students and teachers.

"Listen," said Dr. Kong.  "I know you're the head of some 'gang' and you were all probably planning to leave school with a bang.  Now, I'm sure the first thing that's going to come out of your mouth is, 'But Dr. Kong!  _I _sure as heck didn't do it!' so tell me this…who did?"

"Uh…I dunno." Zoro said.

"You think I'm STUPID, son?" said Dr. Kong, sounding angry.  "I know you or someone from your gang started that fire."

"My gang?" Zoro said with a raised eyebrow.

"Believe it or not, I too was apart of a gang in my younger years so I know how these cliques work." Dr. Kong continued.  "Now, if you tell me who did it then you might get off easier."

"What, you can't suspend me…or expel me." Zoro said.  "It's the last day of school.  I won't be coming back anyway."

"I'm afraid this is more than just a matter of simply expelling or suspending you!" said Dr. Kong.  "You seriously damaged public property and I could take you all the way to court!"

"You could?" said Zoro.  "Why?"

"Because you started the fire!"

"…No I didn't."

"And why should I believe you?" said Dr. Kong, crossing his arms.  "I can tell just by the rebellious angle of your hat that you are bad news!"

"What does my hat have to do with starting fires?" Zoro said with a sigh.

"Don't try and get off the subject." Said Dr. Kong.  "Now all you have to do is prove to me that you did not start the fire and you're off the hook."

"I have plenty of proof." Said Zoro.  "First of all, I practically came to school late because I missed the bus, so there's four other people who can vouch for me that I was with them the whole time since they also missed the bus."

"How do I know that you didn't just come to school and then light the fire, whether you were on time or not?" Dr. Kong speculated.

"Because I went right to homeroom from there." Zoro said.  "Just asked Sanji.  I walked to school with him."  Zoro turned around and pointed at Sanji who was just standing there facing the other direction talking to a few girls.  "He'll tell you that we both went right to homeroom."

"I'll be sure to question him." Said Dr. Kong, giving Zoro the ominous evil eye.

Then Dr. Kong allowed Zoro to go off and then went to retrieve Sanji.  (Dr. Kong did, not Zoro.)

"Excuse me, but I must have a word with you." Said Dr. Kong to Sanji.

"Sure, Dr. Kong." Said Sanji as he waved good-bye to all his lady friends and then turned around to face his principal.  "Yes?"

"Did you miss the bus this morning?" asked Dr. Kong.

"Oh yes," said Sanji, sounding a bit embarrassed.  "I looked out my window and saw a bus drive by so I…"

"I don't need the whole story." Said Dr. Kong.

"Oh." Said Sanji, looking slightly offended.  "Am I in trouble?  I've missed the bus before."

"No, I just need to ask if anyone else missed the bus with you."

"Yeah." Sanji answered.  "Because I mistook the high school bus for OUR bus, I sort of convinced my entire bus stop to start walking and then…"

"Who is 'your entire bus stop'?" Dr. Kong interrupted.

"Zoro, Nami, Luffy and Usopp." Sanji said, pointing to each person.  "Are we ALL in trouble?"

"And when you came to school, what did you do?"

"Well, I went to homeroom.  I don't know what everyone else did."

"So Zoro did NOT walk with you to homeroom?"

Sanji thought for a minute.  "Now that I think about it…he actually did." Sanji corrected himself as he remembered Zoro making fun of him in homeroom.

Dr. Kong gave an exasperated sigh and stormed off to question the rest of Zoro's 'Back of the Bus Gang'.

As Dr. Kong walked away, Sanji sighed to himself as well.  He could have gotten back at Zoro right then and there for making fun of his inability to read so very much.  No!  Not his INABILITY… more so… his STRUGGLES!  But, maybe that word was too harsh as well.  Delayed Progress.  There we go!

The assistant principal, who will remain nameless, got in front of the entire school with a megaphone.  "Attention!" he/she/it yelled and the school of children fell silent.  "This fire is very serious and if you have any information about who may have started it, we would like it very much if you came forth!  As for our situation…it appears as though we'll just have to send you all home!  Have a good summer!"

The students were in shock for a minute, and then they all threw their auxiliary trophies up in the air out of sheer joy and happiness.  Then it was pretty much a mad rush as all the middle school students tried to sprint as fast as they could down to the center of town since that's where all middle school scholars hang out on half days.

Our five main characters found a nice little grassy spot to sit and sigh.


	11. Too Early for Freshman Beat Down

"And I couldn't believe it when the principal automatically assumed that it was me who started the fire just because my hat slants at an obscure angle." Zoro said, though it didn't really look like he cared as much as he was saying.

"I think that's just an excuse for the REAL reason." Said Nami.  "Unless you've forgotten, you beat his son up at the beginning of the year."

Zoro looked like he went into deep thought.  "Oh yeah…" he said vaguely.

"He probably just has something against you." Usopp said as he opened up his thermos that he had brought to school with him for lunchtime.  He poured the Kool-Aid inside into the little cup that is also a cover and then contently drank it.  No one really wanted to tell him that he now had a red Kool-Aid mustache because they enjoyed laughing at him far too much.

"Well, because of me, you're not in any trouble." Sanji said with a certain sense of importance.  "So maybe you should think about being nicer to me."

"Nicer to you?" Zoro asked, confused.

"You know." Said Sanji.  "Just don't treat me so absurdly cruel like you do."

"What do you mean?" Zoro continued.

"For example, don't bring up the fact that I don't have an eighth grade reading level as much." Sanji said, sounding agitated.  "Okay?"

"…Okay." Said Zoro.

Sanji gave a heavy sigh of relief.

"So, as of today, I'm officially NOT a sixth grader anymore!" Luffy cheered.  "Hurray for me!  Go me!"

"Yeah!" said Usopp.  "We're seventh graders now!"

"And with the two Most Popular Girls in School now moving on to the high school, that must mean that I'M the Most Popular Girl in School!" Nami exclaimed happily.

"That's right!" said Sanji, slamming his fist into his palm as if he had just realized something.  He pulled a list out from behind his back and knocked off the first two names on the list and moved Nami's up to Number One.

"Sanji!" gasped Nami.  "You had The List this whole time and you didn't tell me?!"

"Of course." Said Sanji with a laugh.  "Not only am I the Most Popular Boy in School, but I am the most Popular PERSON in School so it would be ludicrous for me not to have one!"

"So you could have moved me up to Number One ALL YEAR?!" Nami yelled.

"I suppose so." Said Sanji, looking the list up and down with a look of satisfaction.  "And I guess if I REALLY wanted to, I could move you OFF The List but it's not like I'm going to do that to YOU, Nami!"

"You better not." Said Nami with an evil glare.

"I would NEVER do such a thing!" Sanji assured her.  "Unless you did something to make me hate you.  But I don't see what you could POSSIBLY do to make me hate you!"

"Except use you to up her popularity." Zoro cut in.

"What?" said Sanji AND Nami at the same time.

"Just think about it." said Zoro.  "If she had KNOWN you had The List, she probably would have even gone out with you to put her at the top."

"Ooohh…" said Sanji as a light bulb went off above his head.

"It doesn't matter now, though, cause I'm already at the top." Said Nami nervously as she hit Zoro on the head for filling Sanji's silly little head with ideas.

"Well, he could always just move you DOWN the list." Said Luffy.

"And then blackmail you so that you'd be his girlfriend in order to get your name back at the top!" Usopp finished.

"But Sanji wouldn't do THAT!" laughed Luffy.

"Of course I wouldn't!" Sanji said.  "That is a terrible thought, to abuse my power so!  Nami, as you rightfully deserve it, you will keep your position."

"Oh, THANK you Sanji!" said Nami as her eyes welded up with tears.

"So will you go on a date with me for being so kind and sweet?" Sanji asked.

"No." Nami said.

"Oh well…" Sanji said as he threw the list behind him.  "I don't have the authority to make changes on the list anyway because I'm in high school now."

"So you made me worry for nothing?!" yelled Nami.

"I did no such thing!" said Sanji, looking offended.  "It was all the others who made you fret!"

"What are we going to do with our day off?" sighed Luffy out of nowhere.

"Do we even have to all hang out together like we did ALL WEEKEND?" Zoro asked.

"YES!" said Luffy.  "Oh!  Let's make that lemonade stand!!"

"No!" said Nami.  "No lemonade stand!!"  Then she looked at Usopp who looked like he was opening his mouth to say something.  "And no Kool-Aid stand either!"

"What are YOUR plans for the day off?" said Usopp, offended.  "Are you just going to sit around and put make-up on all day?"

"How dare you speak to me that way!" said Nami.  "I am an EIGHTH grader now and you have to give me some more respect than that!"

Usopp clearly wasn't the type to argue for very long about matters that weren't important so he only slowly nodded to show that she had won, because Nami was the type who needed to win every battle.

"Well let's see." Said Sanji, lying back on the grass.  "It's almost nine o'clock on a Monday morning.  If we already can't think of something to do, then we're screwed for the whole summer."

"I've got plenty to do this summer." Zoro said.  "Camps and stuff."

"Sounds like fun." Sanji said, rolling his eyes.

Zoro paused for a minute and looked as though he was fighting something back in his head.  Like he REALLY wanted to say something, but knew deep down inside that he shouldn't for some reason.  He twitched slightly with the desire to voice his thoughts.  If he didn't say it, he would surely explode.

"Are you going to summer school to learn how to read?" Zoro said finally.  "Cause it'll kind of be embarrassing if you show up at high school and can't…"

"HEY!!" Sanji yelled, sitting up.  "It's only been five minutes and you're already at it again!!"

"Sorry, I couldn't help it." said Zoro.  "I'll try harder next time."

Sanji frowned.

"…So…are you?" Luffy asked Sanji.

"Am I what?" Sanji replied.

"Going to summer school to learn how to read." Luffy finished.

"NO!!" yelled Sanji.  "I'M NOT!!"

It was quiet.

"You should." Zoro said.

"You're not trying!!" said Sanji angrily.

"No, I really AM trying." Zoro said.

"Well then that's sad." Said Nami.

"I'M getting a summer tutor." Said Usopp.  "Maybe I could get her to teach you too, Sanji!"

Sanji covered his face in disbelief for a minute and let out a slight groan.  "I don't need help!" he said.  "I'm coming along just fine!  And I would like it if you guys didn't bring it up again!"  He glared at Zoro who was spaciously looking at something else at the moment.

"I personally want to go home and go to sleep right now." Said Zoro, since he had probably been thinking of that since the last time he had added to the argument.

"How can you go back to sleep after you've gotten up and showered and gotten dressed and everything?" said Nami.  "I CAN'T go back to bed after I've showered."  Zoro looked at her blankly and Nami suddenly looked surprised and shocked as she looked upon Zoro.  "You DID shower, didn't you?"

"Yeah." He said, but something about the way he said it wasn't too reassuring.  With that, he stood up and yawned a loud and flamboyant yawn, and stretched his arms WAY up in the sky.

"Where are you going?" Luffy asked with the expression that a puppy makes when his master leaves for work every morning.

"Nowhere." Zoro answered.  "We've got nothing to do."

"I don't see YOU brainstorming." Nami said.

"Well, I know where I want to go but you guys would probably hate it…" said Zoro vaguely.  "Actually, maybe Sanji might want to go.  I don't know if he'd enjoy it, though.  It would be in his best interest."

"I'VE BEEN TO THE LIBRARY PLENTY OF TIMES!!!" yelled Sanji.

"The library?" Zoro said, raising an eyebrow.  He looked up.  "Ah yes.  I remember.  We have one of those, don't we?"

"Why can't you leave me alone…?" complained Sanji.

"I wasn't suggesting going to the library." Said Zoro.  "That's where people like Usopp hang out and ONE Usopp is more than enough."

"I feel special that I am that Usopp." Said Usopp even though he wasn't catching on that it was an insult.

"Where were you thinking of?" asked Luffy.

"The gym." Said Zoro.

"Why would _I _have to go there?!" demanded Sanji.  "Or NEED to for that matter?  I'd rather go to the library…"

"I take it you've never heard of Freshman Beat Down." Said Zoro, sitting back down.

"…Freshman Beat Down?" Sanji repeated, sounding intrigued.

"Yeah, I guess not." Said Zoro.  "They don't have freshmen at your private school, did they?"

"I'VE heard of Freshman Beat Down!" said Usopp.  "It's AWFUL!!  It's when all the upperclassmen guys in school gang up on the freshmen boys and beat them up within the first week of school as orientation!"

"What?!" Sanji said, looking shocked.

"Yes." Said Zoro.  "So I plan on spending all my free time during the summer strengthening myself up so that when Freshman Beat Down rolls around, I'll be ready for them."

"Zoro, you realize that you being beefed up will just make them want to beat you up MORE." Said Nami.

"I will fend them off." Said Zoro in a determined voice.

"Think about it." said Nami.  "The upperclassmen have… facial hair.  And they're… eighteen and stuff.  And they can drive.  And smoke."  She glanced at Sanji.  "…Legally."

"I don't care where you guys go, but I'm going to the gym." Zoro announced.

"Well I'd better go too!" said Sanji, trying not to sound nervous.

"I'm going to start pumping up now so I'll be even bigger and tougher than Zoro!" said Luffy.

"ME TOO!!" said Usopp.

"When I'm an upperclassman, I'm going to beat you down so bad." Said Zoro to Usopp and Luffy.  "It'll be my goal."

"Then I have to work even HARDER to get stronger than you!" Luffy declared as Usopp only cowered in fear.

With that, the four men stood up and punched the air and paraded off to the gym that was, thankfully, in their town center, so it was in walking distance.  After Nami sat there for a moment, she gave a heavy sigh and figured she could always drop a couple pounds ESPECIALLY since she was going to be the Most Popular Girl in School and needed to set an example for all the fat girls.  So she followed them there.

"All right, we don't have membership cards," said Zoro as he turned to everyone else outside the door.  "So all we have to do is avoid eye contact as we walk by the front desk and the guy behind it usually doesn't say anything."

"OKAY!!!" chimed everyone.  They hurried in the door and rushed past the front desk (which didn't even have a guy behind it) and ran into the main gym area.


	12. Is Smoking Cool?

They split up into to groups.  The first group was Luffy, Usopp, Zoro and Sanji.  The second group was Nami.  The first group went into the boy's locker room.  And the second group went into the girl's locker room.  Or is it…the other way around?  No wait, I think I was right the first time.

"WOW!" said Luffy as he opened a little locker and pulled out a shirt.  "I can't believe that they actually supply us with gym wear!!"  He held it up in front of him to show that it was about fifteen sizes too big and had sweat stains all over it.

Zoro looked up at the shirt Luffy was holding.  "Uh…I don't think that is gym wear supplied by the gym…" he started.

"I think it's a little big!" said Usopp as he opened up his own locker and pulled out a similar shirt.

"Guys, that's someone else's shirts." Said Zoro.  "Ones they brought.  From home.  They're not for you to just WEAR."

"I don't even know why we came into the locker room." Sighed Sanji.  "It's not like we have clothes we can change into.  Which makes me extremely sad because now it makes me unable to workout for Freshmen Beat Down."

"You're not going to work out just because you don't have a change of clothes?" said Zoro as Luffy and Usopp changed into their enormous shirts that they found and decided to make theirs.  But you were there for that so you should know.

"We're going to go work out now!" said Usopp as he picked up the shirt a little bit so he wouldn't trip over it.  He and Luffy then ran out at the speed of light.

"Zoro, please." Said Sanji as if Zoro was stupid.  "I got this shirt at Abercrombie and Fitch for seventy-five dollars and I won't even bother to tell you how much these PANTS cost!  So there is no way I'm going to work out in these."

"Well, you could try going to the gift shop area and seeing if they sell any gift clothes that you could wear as work out clothes." Said Zoro with a shrug.

"Oh yes." Said Sanji with a nod.

"And, since you're buying yourself an entire outfit, you might as well get me one too and it's not like it'll be strange or anything, because both outfits together should equal out to the cost of that one shirt.  So it'll almost be like you're at Abercrombie and Fitch!"

Sanji shook his head and glared menacingly at Zoro.  "I hate you."

So they went into the gift shop and made their way over to the shirt and shorts area.  "I don't WANT to wear shorts!" Sanji complained.

"Why?" Zoro asked, shifting through the shirts.  He could only find X Large and XX Large and XXX Large and even higher.

"Why don't they sell pants here?" Sanji continued.

"No one works out in pants." Said Zoro.  "And everyone who does regrets it five minutes later.  Which raises the question; it is practically ninety degrees outside and you are wearing pants AND a jacket.  Why?"

"Well, I wanted to wear these pants and this jacket just matches so well…" Sanji explained.

"Yeah but why are you wearing pants?" Zoro asked.

"If you MUST know…it's because I haven't shaved in a while." Sanji said, lowering his voice.

Zoro took a moment.  "I…can't tell." He said truthfully.

"Of course not." Said Sanji.  "I'm wearing pants after all."

"What do pants have to do with shaving?" Zoro said, genuinely confused.

"Well, if you haven't shaved, you can always wear pants so no one will know." Sanji replied.

"Wait…you mean…shave your legs?" Zoro said.

Sanji stared at Zoro.  "What ELSE would I be talking about?" he said.

"Your FACE?" Zoro suggested.

"Yes, this morning I think I saw something growing in and I'm thinking I might grow a small little beard in time for high school…"

"No…wait.  You JUST said that you shaved your legs."

Sanji paused for a moment and then looked down.  "Well… I haven't for a little while…"

"Guys don't shave their legs!" Zoro yelled.

"What do you mean?" laughed Sanji.  But then he realized that Zoro was so serious that he was on the brink of being offended.  "What?!  You can't tell me that guys don't shave their legs!  YOU do!"

"_I do not!!_" Zoro said very dramatically.

"Then how can you explain the fact that there is NO hair on your legs?" Sanji said, thinking he had caught Zoro there.

Zoro looked as though he REALLY didn't want to answer.  "I'm just not very hairy yet." He confessed finally.

"Well, PLENTY of guys shave their legs." Sanji assured Zoro.  But he was probably assuring himself more.

"So you shave your legs, cook, smoke AND wear girly clothes?" Zoro concluded.  "Not to mention the fact that you…"

"Don't say it." said Sanji.

"…have that weird curly eyebrow." Zoro finished as if he was going to say that the whole time and Sanji was silly for assuming that he was going to say something else.

Sanji sighed and picked up a pair of shorts.  "I suppose these will have to do." He said sadly.

"No, those WON'T do." Said Zoro, taking them from him.

"And why is that?" Sanji asked, sounding annoyed.

"Sanji, these are a size SMALL." Said Zoro.  "Guys don't wear smalls."

"But those are just on the border line of being too BIG for me!" said Sanji, pointing at the small.

"Trust me, it is SO uncool to wear size small." Zoro assured him.  "It's bad enough that you shave your legs and everything but if you're caught wearing a small, especially at a gym, it'll be Freshman Beat Down all over again."  He picked up two mediums.  "Here, you take this one."

"But they're going to be falling down while I'm trying to work out!" Sanji complained.

"They're supposed to be pulled down half way your legs anyway." Zoro said.

"What?" Sanji said, looking confused.  "Why?"

"Because it's COOL." Zoro said.

"So wearing clothes that are too big for me is cool?" Sanji asked.

"Yes." Zoro replied.

"Are you just trying to make a fool of me?"

"I think you do a good enough job at that without my help." Zoro said, rolling his eyes as he grabbed two medium sized shirts as well.

So they went up and purchased their brand new gym clothes with the gym's logo printed all over it.  After changing in the locker room, they made their way into the gym area.

"I feel so awkward." Said Sanji as he held the excess rim of his shorts.  He began to tie the drawstring but Zoro stopped him.

"WHAT are you doing NOW?" he demanded.

"They're falling down and I am uncomfortable with that!" Sanji said.

"Geez, if I didn't know better I'd say you were a girl." Zoro said, shaking his head.

"What, tying drawstrings is uncool too?" Sanji asked.

"Uh…yeah?" Zoro said as if it was the most obvious thing ever.  "What did you learn at that private school of yours while they weren't teaching you to read?"

"All kinds of things!" Sanji said, offended.  "Like cooking and sewing and…"

"That explains it." Zoro said, realizing there was no hope for Sanji.

"Hey look!" said Sanji, pointing a little ways in front of them.  "There's Nami!  It looks like she got the same idea we did and purchased new clothes at the gift shop."

They went over to wear Nami was peddling on the sitting down bike machine at a very low speed.

"Good morning Nami!" said Sanji as he went to sit down on the bike machine next to her but Zoro grabbed his collar.

"Don't tell me you're doing what I THINK you're doing." Said Zoro, looking very concerned.

"I have to pump myself up for Freshman Beat Down!" Sanji argued.

"Yeah…but not on that." Zoro said, pointing at the bike machine.

"What's up with you being so alarmed with my ways all of a sudden?" Sanji asked.

"If I have to be seen with you in public…" started Zoro.

"Could you guys go somewhere else and do that bickering male stuff?" Nami interrupted.  "You're right in my way…"

Sanji and Zoro turned around to see where Nami was trying to look.  They saw a bunch of beautiful weight machines with all kinds of buff guys walking around lifting heavy weights.

"Well that looks dreadful." Said Sanji.

"THAT'S where we're going." Zoro said as he grabbed Sanji's arm and began to pull him in that direction as Sanji waved goodbye to his Nami.

They passed by Luffy who was on the rowing machine.  "ROW ROW ROW YOUR BOAT GENTLY DOWN THE STREAM!!!" screamed Luffy at the top of his lungs as if no one was around to hear him.  Then he caught sight of Zoro and Sanji.  "Hey guys!  Jump on!  I give you a gentle ride down the stream cause life is but a dream!!  And it's merry too!!"

"Uh…that's all right." Said Zoro.

Then Usopp ran over.  "Move over Luffy!" said Usopp, jumping on the back.  "I need a ride!"

"Then you've come to the right place!" Luffy declared as he began rowing like mad.  As the two of them cheered ridiculously, Sanji and Zoro hurried away while they were distracted and hoped that not too many people had caught them associating with a few psycho sixth graders.  Excuse me, SEVENTH graders.

"All right, we have to start out with the smaller weights." Said Zoro as he pulled out two ten-pound weights and sat down on a bench.  "I don't want to strain anything to early.  Eventually, I'll make my way up to the heavier ones."

"That sounds like a good idea." Said Sanji as he looked through the weights and suddenly caught sight of something yellow.  He reached for it to find that it was a long stretchy yellow band.  "Oh!  I think I'll use this one!" Sanji declared as he sat down next to Zoro and started stretching it.

Zoro paused and looked over at Sanji.  "No." said Zoro, dropping one of the weights and tearing the yellow thing out of Sanji's hand.  "NO, Sanji.  No, no, no.  This is the most unmanly thing you could possibly be doing right now.  It's worse than the bikes."

"You know what?" Sanji said, standing up and putting his hands on his hips.  "All you've done is criticize me since we've got here!  As a matter of fact, all you've done is criticize me since you found out that I wasn't very good at reading!  Come to think of it…all you've ever done is criticize me ever since I met you… but still!"

"Sanji, you come to a gym so you can get stronger, not stretch some stupid yellow thing." Zoro said, tossing the yellow thing behind him.  He picked up the weight he dropped and handed them both to Sanji.  "Here, use this.  It's for your own good."

Zoro got up and went back to the weights.  He picked up a few fifteen pounders because he felt he had worked his way up to that.  Then he sat down next to Sanji.

"I think I'll just stick with one of these for now." Said Sanji as he put one down.

"If you're going to do that, only use one hand." Said Zoro as he tried not to look just in case Sanji had grabbed the single weight with both hands and was now attempting to lift it like that.

Sanji slowly put his other hand by his side.  "Why, is that unmanly too?" he asked.

"Yes." Zoro answered plainly.

They sat there lifting weights for a little while, Sanji changing hands every few minutes and Zoro changing weights every few minutes.

"Hey, watch it kids." Said some really buff guy with a cigar in his mouth and no shirt on as he walked over to where Sanji and Zoro were sitting.  They both looked up at him for a minute.

"What?" Zoro said irritably.

"I'm going to use those weights." He said, pointing to the bench they were sitting on.  They looked behind them to see that they were sitting on one of the many bench press areas.

"There are plenty of other ones." Sanji said humbly.  "Why don't you use one that someone's not sitting on?"

"Hey, kid, when I say move I mean move!" said the buff guy.

"I'm no kid!" said Sanji.  "I'm in high school!"

"Sanji…shut up…" said Zoro.

"And?" said the guy.  "So am I."

Sanji looked shocked.  "You are?" he asked.

"Yeah." Said the guy.  "I'm going to be a senior next year.  What are you?  An incoming freshman?"

"Uh…" Sanji stuttered.

"Thought so." Said the guy.  "Well, I'll be looking for you…AND you—" he pointed at Zoro.  "—for the Freshman Beat Downs."

"Why me?" Zoro asked, sounding annoyed as Sanji let out a helpless gasp.

"Because I just don't like you." He replied.

"Well, I don't particularly like you either." Said Zoro, putting his weights down and standing up.  The senior was about a head taller than Zoro.  "I come to this gym a lot so I can get stronger and healthier.  I don't need people like you to come in smoking and filling my lungs with second hand smoke."

"People…like…ME?" said the senior, balling his hand into a fist.

"Yeah." Said Zoro as Sanji attempted to make him stop.  "You won't have to LOOK for me on Freshman Beat Down Day.  I'll be there.  Looking for YOU."

A few people that were standing behind the senior gasped.

"Do you have any idea who I am?" the senior demanded.

"Nope." Zoro said, sitting back down in a style that showed he was most uninterested.

"My name is Smoker of the Marine Gang at the high school!" said the senior, obviously proud of what he was apart of.  "You remember that name…?"

"Zoro." Zoro answered.  "Roronoa Zoro."

"Roronoa Zoro." Smoker repeated.

"And this is Sanji." Zoro said.  "He likes home economics."

"Why'd you tell him MY name?!" Sanji yelled.

"Come on, guys." Said Smoker to his group of friends as he turned to leave.  "Let's get outta here."

"Good, maybe the air will clear out." Said Zoro under his breath as Smoker left.  He looked at Sanji who was pulling out a cigarette and starting to light it.  "Hey!!  What are you doing?!"

"You made me nervous, I HAVE to smoke!" said Sanji in a whiny tone.

"Not in here!!" yelled Zoro.  "The sign says no smoking, and even if it didn't, _I _say so!!  You can't get stronger if you smoke!!"  Then he grabbed the cigarette, ripped it in half and then ripped both the halves in half, threw all the halves (or quarters) on the ground and stomped on them.  Then he grabbed the stretchy yellow thing and wrapped the cigarette remains in it and tossed it as far as he could.

Sanji just watched.  "I could always just light another one." He said.

"Not after you just witnessed how passionately I disposed of that one." Zoro replied.

"Yeah." Said Sanji.  "That was a little unnerving."

"I think I'm ready for the fifty pounders." Said Zoro, putting down the thirty-five pounders and picking up the fifty pounders.

"Hey, are there any kinds of weight lifting exercises that involve one's legs that wouldn't potentially make one look unmanly?" Sanji asked.

"The leg press?" Zoro suggested.

"Yes, that one." Sanji said as he got up and went over to wear Zoro was pointing.  "So…I just sit here and put my feet here and push?"

"Yeah." Said Zoro as he strained himself to lift the fifty-pound weights.

"This doesn't look to hard." Said Sanji, looking at the weight settings.  "Well, considering I was having a bit of trouble with the ten pound weights, I should probably just go with FIVE…" he narrated to himself as he moved the metal peg so that he was only lifting five pounds.

"Five?" Zoro said, looking up momentarily.  Then he shook his head as Sanji began to push with his legs.  "Sanji, you're a disgrace to all mankind.  I feel sorry for myself just because I'm the same species as you."

"That was uncalled for!" said Sanji as he stopped his workout.  "But I think I can go a little higher than five.  It's rather easy."

"Of course." Said Zoro.  "The leg press is an easy exercise."

"I don't see YOU doing it." said Sanji, moving the peg down to thirty.

"That's because I'm already…" started Zoro, but then he had an idea.  "I've got it!  If I lift weights AND do the leg press, instead of doing them both individually then I'll be able to spend the time I would usually spend doing the leg press…and do something else!  I'll beef up in half the time!  Sanji, I never thought I'd say this… but you're a genius!  Even if you CAN'T read."

"I think I can do…maybe fifty." Said Sanji as he tried to ignore Zoro.

"Sanji, if you're having such an easy time with the low weights, you have to go up with higher increments than twenty." Said Zoro as he went over to the leg press that was next to Sanji.

"Shows how much YOU know." Said Sanji as he got up to move the peg up even more again.  "Five to thirty is twenty-five.  Sanji: 2!  Zoro…STILL nothing!"

"What about ALL the insults I have been throwing at you for the past hour?" said Zoro as he moved the leg press weight up to 150.  "Did those just not count?"

"No, they didn't count at all." Said Sanji as he readjusted his shorts that were falling down as he sat back at the leg press.

"But…wait, whatever." Said Zoro, rolling his eyes.  "I don't care about your stupid made up tally sheet."

"Maybe I'll just go up to one hundred." Said Sanji, feeling daring.  "Well, this is really easy too.  How much are you doing Zoro?  I'll try that much."

"You can't do as much as ME." Said Zoro as he sped up his weight lifting just to show Sanji how useless he really was.  But Sanji did the leg press at 150 and found it to be easy, so decided to move it up to 175.  No sooner than two minutes later did he move it up to 200.

"Wow!" said Sanji as he marveled at his accomplishments.  "I think I should just move straight to 250."

"Sanji, stop pretending that you can do that much." Zoro said.

"You're one to talk." Said Sanji.  "You are SO strained and I've never seen anyone sweat that much just because you're lifting all that weight and obviously can't do it."

"That's so not true." Said Zoro as he tried to go even faster.

"Yeah it is." Sanji said.  "Your face is SO red that you look like some kind of…oh I don't know.  A tomato!  Even with the green stem."

"A WHAT?!" Zoro yelled, dropping all the weights so they crashed loudly down.  He reached over and grabbed a towel and started drying off his face.  "I think I need to…go to the bathroom or something."  He got up and quickly walked off before Sanji could say anything else.

"Ha ha." Said Sanji once he was alone.  "Sanji: _3_!"


	13. Freshmen Don't Compare to Juniors

Zoro opened the bathroom door only to find it foggy and smoke filled.  He looked around for a minute only to find Smoker standing on the other side of the bathroom with not one, but TWO cigars in his mouth.

Zoro put his hand over his mouth and began to cough VERY loudly.  No one knows if the coughing was real or not, but it sounded so loud and attention craving that we can assume it was.  When Smoker finally turned around to face him, he stopped.

"You got a problem?" said Smoker, looking annoyed.

"Yeah, YOU." Said Zoro.  "You're smoking in a public bathroom."

"Excuse me, FRESHMAN, but I guess it slipped your mind that I'm a senior at the high school." Said Smoker as if that should make him automatically better than Zoro.  Even though it DOES.

"No, it didn't slip my mind at all!" said Zoro as he got all in Smoker's face.

"That does it, I'm DEFINITELY beating you down so hard!" said Smoker.

"I'd like to see you try!" said Zoro.

"What's that supposed to mean?" demanded Smoker.

"Did you know that every cigarette you smoke, you loose FOURTEEN minutes of your life?" Zoro said.  "And since a cigar is like smoking TEN cigarettes… and I can't help but notice that you're smoking TWO cigars right now.  So that's TWENTY cigarettes you have in your mouth right now.  I don't even know how many minutes you're losing of your life!  And for all I know, I'm losing just as much, if not MORE, by standing in this room inhaling your second hand smoke!"

Yes, Zoro had gone through the D.A.R.E. program very recently and taken it very seriously.

"And what's that got to do with Freshman Beat Down?" said Smoker.

"Well, if you continue with your constant smoking then your health will only go down the drain and you'll be too busy coughing to fight!" said Zoro.  "So make sure to bring your inhaler!"

Smoker stared at Zoro for a minute.  "Get lost kid." Said Smoker finally.

"I was leaving anyway!" said Zoro.  "Who wants to stay in a room filled with your exhaled smoke?"  With that, he turned to leave to the bathroom.

Meanwhile, Sanji had found that pumping iron by himself was very easy and very boring.  Besides, he had put the setting on the maximum weight and it was still…not that hard.  So he figured he would go off and find Nami.

He was unable to find her for a little while, but then caught sight of her walking into a small room.  Without thinking, he frolicked after her to find that he was in a room filled with a bunch of ladies in tight clothing, all turned around looking at him.

"Sanji, what are you doing here?" Nami said, sounding slightly angry.

"I just followed you." Said Sanji.

"Excuse me, young man, but this is an aerobics class." Said the instructor who was standing at the front of the room.

Sanji gasped.  "I LOVE aerobics!" he exclaimed. 

"This is a WOMEN'S aerobics class." Said Nami, trying to push him out the door.

"Actually, it's not…" said the instructor.  "I've got no problems with him staying."

"But I do!" whined Nami.

"Oh let him stay!" said some lady.  All the other ladies agreed because they thought the idea of a boy wanting to do aerobics, especially LOVING aerobics, was just precious.

"Then I'm leaving." Said Nami as she turned to leave.

"But Nami!" said Sanji, getting down on one knee.  "Even though you're a year younger than me and I'm in high school now, I still believe there's a connection between us!"

"Awww…" swooned the ladies.  "He's so sweet and she must be SO popular!"

Nami stopped at the door.  "Well…I guess I'll stay for a little while." She said, turning back around.  All the ladies and Sanji cheered as the aerobics class commenced.

In a land far away, there was a game of racquetball going on.  However, if we did not just tell you that it was racquetball, one would never know.  It was more of a game of 'Hit the Ball' as Luffy and Usopp ran around on the court swinging madly at the little ball as it bounced around innocently.

"This is the funnest game ever!" said Luffy as he pulled his shirt up and tied a huge clump of it by his side.

"Yeah, it was almost as fun as pretending we were pirates on that rowing machine!!" said Usopp.

"We WERE pirates, Usopp." Said Luffy, getting completely serious.  "And we still are."

"Oh." Said Usopp nervously.  "Okay."

Just then, the door opened slightly and Zoro poked his head in.  "I THOUGHT I heard you two in here." He said, walking in and shutting the door behind him.

"HEY ZORO!!" said Luffy happily.  "You wanna play with us?  We got you a racquet just in case you happen to wander by!"  He pointed over at the three racquets over in the corner.  "We got one for Sanji and Nami too for the very same reason."

"You can't play with THREE people." Said Zoro.

"Sure you can!" said Usopp because, by their rules, as many people as they wanted could play.

"Fine, but I'll show you." Said Zoro as if he REALLY needed to prove to himself that he was better than Luffy and Usopp.

So, after Usopp took a few puffs of his inhaler, Luffy served the ball.  Usopp ran up and hit it and the ball went straight back towards Luffy.  As Zoro ran across the court to hit it as his turn, Luffy suddenly hit it again.  While Zoro was in shock, Luffy ran up and hit it for a THIRD time, and then Usopp hit it and then Luffy hit it again and at that point, Zoro couldn't take it anymore.

"Wait a second!" he said, grabbing the ball in midair.  "This is NOT how you play racquetball!"

Luffy and Usopp both looked at their racquets and then at Zoro with very questioning looks.  "Racquetball?" said Usopp finally.

"Yes, RACQUETBALL." Said Zoro, enunciating every syllable.

"Well, whatever game that is, we weren't playing it." said Luffy.  Usopp immediately agreed with a nod.

"What do you mean?" Zoro asked.  "What game were you playing?"

"Hit the Ball." Usopp answered.

Zoro might have been on the verge of tears just then if not for the fact that he was so manly.  Calmly and under complete control, Zoro attempted to explain the rules of point behind racquetball.

"Okay!" said Luffy.  "I think I get it!!"

"Let's play!!" Usopp said.

But they ended up playing just another round of Hit the Ball.

"THAT'S IT!" said Zoro, swinging the door open so hard that it lodged into the wall.  "I'm not playing with you two anymore!  You're HOPELESS!!"  Then he slammed the door behind him, leaving Usopp and Luffy there to shrug and continue their rousing game of Hit the Ball.

As Zoro stomped down the hallway, ready to commit suicide with his racket, he bumped into a girl who was walking in the opposite direction.

"Sorry," he grunted angrily.

"It's okay." Said the girl as she continued walking.  He did too, but he suddenly heard someone calling.  "Hey!  Hey, excuse me!"  He turned around to see the girl he had crashed into running back over to him.

"I said I was sorry." Said Zoro.

"I know." Said the girl.  "I just couldn't help but notice that you had a racquetball racquet in your hand and THEN I noticed that you weren't walking with anyone…"

"And?" led Zoro.

"Well, if you don't have anything to do…" she started.  "I don't have anyone to play with…and if it's not too much trouble…"

"Yeah…sure…whatever…" Zoro said.  "It's not like I'm doing anything else."

"Oh good!" she said happily.  "My name is Tashigi.  What's yours?"

"Zoro."

"Okay!" said Tashigi.  "Let's play!"  She made her way into a racquetball court that wasn't occupied and Zoro joined her.

"Wait…you do know how to play, don't you?" Zoro said slowly.

"Of course I do!" Tashigi laughed.  "I've been playing ever since I was a little girl!"

The match was a long one and a very grueling one, but in the end, Zoro rose triumphant.  He had also been playing racquetball, along with every other sport in the world, ever since he was just a little smidget.

"Do you go to the high school?" Tashigi asked as the two of them left the court.  "I've never really seen your face.  It would be nice to see you around sometime and challenge you again!"

"Let's just say I do." Said Zoro since he wasn't about to admit that he was only a freshman.

"Well, maybe we'll be in a few classes together!" said Tashigi.  "I'm going to be a junior next year.  Maybe I'll see you around at the gym, though!  I'll see you later!" 

With that, she hurried off in search of any comrades she might have come with.

Zoro was left there alone to bask in his happiness that he looked like a junior when he was only a freshman.

Meanwhile, Sanji, Nami and all the other ladies in the aerobics class were leaving the aerobics room laughing and being ALL to happy.  With the exception of Nami of course.  She was upset.  She had to spend a long period of time with Sanji.

"That was a good change of pace!" said the instructor.  "Thank you all for coming to the lesson and I'll see you tomorrow!"

All the ladies departed and left only Nami and Sanji.  "Wasn't that FUN, Nami?" asked Sanji as he skipped along next to Nami.  "It was so much more exhilarating that lifting weights.  I feel so refreshed now.  Do you feel as refreshed as I do?  I think only a shower could make me feel more refreshed."

"Yeah…" Nami said, looking at the clock to see that it was eleven thirty.

"Wow!" said Sanji, looking at the clock as well.  "It's almost lunch time!  We should all go to lunch to reward ourselves for all this workout time!  Better yet, we could all go over to my house and I could make you all lunch!"

"I think I like the idea of going out better." Nami answered.

"What?" Sanji said, stopping dead in his tracks.  "You don't like my cooking?"

"It's not that!" said Nami quickly.  "It's just…we went to your house the other day."

"Oh." Said Sanji, scratching his chin.  "I guess that's reasonable."

"So I guess we should find everyone else and tell them our plans." Nami concluded.

Meanwhile, in the boy's locker room…

Two extremely large men that definitely exceeded seven feet walked into the locker room and opened up their lockers.  "Hey, Dorry!" said the first one.  "My clothes are missing!!"

"GEH GEH GEH GEH GEH!!" laughed the second one.  But then he looked in HIS locker to find that his shirt was missing as well.  "Mine's missing too, Brogy!"

"GEH GEH GEH GEH GEH!!!!" laughed them both.

"Will you two keep it down over there?" said Smoker from the other side of the locker room as he put a second cigar in his mouth and put his shirt on.

Dorry and Brogy looked at each other and then lowered their voices.  "Geh geh geh geh geh…" they said quietly.

Smoker finished clothing himself and then left the locker room only to meet up with his girlfriend, Tashigi, who was waiting ever so patiently for him.

"What did you do today?" Tashigi asked as the two of them left the gym.

"What do you think I did?" asked Smoker.  "I pumped iron."

"Of course." Said Tashigi.  "Well, I finally found someone who's better at racquetball than me!"

"Oh?" said Smoker, not all that interested.

"Yeah!" said Tashigi.  "He says he goes to the high school, but I've never seen him before."

They were just about to get in their car, when our five main characters walked out of the gym telling each other about their experiences.  Smoker caught sight of Zoro and Sanji and glared at them angrily.  Then, observing that they were in a pack, decided that he didn't like any of them.

"Oh!" said Tashigi.  "There he is!  His name was Zoro!"

Smoker's eyes narrowed.  "Roronoa Zoro…" he muttered as they walked towards the bus stop that would take them to the mall to get something to eat.  "I'll see you at Freshman Beat Down."

"Do you guys STILL do that?" Tashigi sighed.  "Do you know him or something?  What, is he in YOUR grade?"

Smoker watched the bus drive away and then got into his own car.  "No." he answered.  "That Zoro is a freshman."

"A WHAT?!" screamed Tashigi.  "He was a freshman that whole time and he didn't tell me?!  I can't believe it!  He beat me at racquetball!!  That's intolerable!  I have to find him and challenge him again!  And this time…I'll beat him."


	14. The Friendliest Place Ever

Sometime later, Zoro, Nami, Sanji, Luffy and Usopp had reached their public mall area.  At that point, it was already like…one o'clock.  Okay?  Is that all right if it was too long a period of time since the last time we told you the o'clock?  Can you live with it?

"So, where should we go out to eat?!" Luffy said excitedly.

"I don't know." Everyone replied at the same time, EVEN LUFFY!!  Sooner or later, they came to the un-mutual decision of going Friendly's, which they, of course, had in the mall.

They waited in line for a quite a while until a waitress finally came to them.  "Thanks for waiting!" she said in a friendly fashion.  "How many?"

"Five." They all replied at the exact same time.

"Follow me!" said the waitress as she started walking to find them a table.  As they were sitting down and the waitress was frolicking off, Sanji grabbed her shirt.

"Excuse me, do you have a smoking section?" he asked.

"Oh, I'm sorry, no, we don't allow smoking in here." She said and looked authentically apologetic.

"That's okay, we wouldn't have sat in that section ANYWAY." Said Zoro as he barely restrained himself from smiting Sanji.

There was much dispute on who should sit where.  Usopp and Luffy wanted to sit next to each other.  That left the other three to sit on the OTHER side.  Nami wouldn't sit next to Sanji, and Zoro refused to sit on the same side as or across from him.  Sanji wanted to at least sit near his beloved Nami, but also wanted to have a lot of room so he would have liked to be on the side of the table that had only two people on it. Usopp required an isle seat just in case he had to go to the bathroom.

It's a puzzle, guys.  How can we make EVERYONE happy?!

So Zoro sat by the wall on one side of the booth and Nami sat next to him.  Next to her sat Luffy and next to Luffy was Usopp.  Then, all by himself on the opposite side of the table, sat Sanji across from Nami.

There!  Did you get that?!  YOU BETTER HAVE!!  If you didn't, you might as well just go home now because we don't want a brain dead person like you to read the rest of our story.

As Sanji sat on one side of the booth all by himself, he looked at Zoro, Nami, Luffy and Usopp who were all squished on the other side.  "Uh…this seems kind of ludicrous." He commented.

"YOU'RE the one who refused to sit on the same side as Luffy and Usopp!" Zoro yelled.  "Geez, Sanji!  If you sat over here and Nami and I sat over there then it'll make so much more sense!"

"But I don't want to share the booth with two other people…" Sanji said.

"I know!" said Usopp as he stood up and then sat in the isle seat on the same side as Sanji.  "There!"

"But I thought we were going to sit next to each other!" whined Luffy.

"Now we're sitting ACROSS from each other which is even better because we won't have to turn around to talk." Said Usopp.

"Yeah!" Luffy said, his eyes lighting up.  "We just have to look forward!"  They exchanged thoughts about how convenient their new set-up was, as Zoro, Sanji and Nami only stared at them with gaping expressions.

While they were all distracted so, they didn't notice two particular people enter Friendy's and take their seat in the booth right behind Sanji and Usopp.  They had their menus up so it covered their faces, but any fool would be able to tell that it was Tashigi and Smoker.  They had taken liking to the thought of stalking these horrible children and catching them when they were most off guard.

"I need a kid's menu…" said Usopp.  "I want the macaroni and cheese and one of those colorful drinks."

"Which drink do you like the best?" asked Luffy.  "I think the blue one is the best, then the green one, then the LIGHT blue one and then the red one."

"No way!" said Usopp passionately.  "The green one is by far the best!  Then the light blue one, then the regular blue one and then the red one."

"At least we both agree that the red one is the worst." Said Luffy.

"But you are so wrong." Said Usopp.  "The blue one is so not the best."

"Yes it is!" said Luffy, sounding irritated beyond belief.

"The GREEN drink is the best!!" Usopp argued.

"The BLUE one!!" Luffy joined.  Sanji, Zoro and Nami still couldn't help but continue to stare at the two with gaping expressions.

"That's got to be the stupidest thing I've ever heard someone argue about." Zoro said as he started looking at his menu.

"I don't know, you and Sanji have argued about some pretty stupid things." Said Nami somewhat quietly.

"Zoro starts them all." Sanji defended.

"I do not!" said Zoro.

"I rest my case." Said Nami.

"We weren't going to start arguing, Nami!" Sanji assured her.

"Yeah, and we SO do not argue about stupid things." Zoro added.  "All the things we argue about are meaningful and NOT stupid."

"Let's think for a minute…" Nami said, rolling her eyes.  "I have NO idea how many arguments you two have started about Sanji not knowing how to read, for starters."

"Nami!" gasped Sanji.  "I have told you all MANY times that I DO know how to read, just not very well!"

"And besides, those aren't arguments." Zoro said.  "That's just me making fun of him because he can't read.  If it were an argument then he would say that he actually DOES know how to read and then I would tell him that he can't."

"But I CAN read!" Sanji said.

"Sure, sure." Said Zoro.  "You can tell yourself that."

"I don't like you." Said Sanji.

"Then it's mutual." Zoro replied.

Just when things were about to get UN-friendly, a friendly waitress came over to make the atmosphere friendly.

So then they ordered.  Both Sanji and Nami ended up getting salads, while Zoro got some kind of enormous hamburger with ALL the tidings!  Both Luffy and Usopp ended up getting macaroni and cheese, but Usopp got the GREEN drink and Luffy got the BLUE drink.

Conversation pretty much ceased right then and there as they all mowed down.  This was, of course, AFTER they received their food from the Friendly Waitress.

Then came the check.

"Fourty-two…" Sanji said, picking up the check.  "That means that if we each pay ten dollars, it will cover both the check AND the tip.  Nami…"

"Would you pay for me, Sanji?" asked Nami.

"I was just about to ask that!" Sanji laughed.  "But you three still have to pay your ten dollars."

"I don't know about you guys, but I don't usually bring ten dollars with me to school." Said Zoro, leaning back.

"Yeah, I really don't either." Said Luffy.

"I don't even think I've ever even had that much money in my life!" Usopp added with a chuckle.  Everyone chuckled with him for a few seconds until Sanji cleared his throat.

"You're all implying that you did not bring any money?" he said.

"Yeah." Said the other three men.

Sanji opened his wallet to see his wad of money.

"Wow!" said Usopp, leaning over to see all the money.  "Where'd you get all that money?!"

"I just got my allowance!" said Sanji, inching away.  "Plus, I have a job!"

"You have a job?" said Zoro.  "Why?  Don't tell me you baby-sit."

"I do." Said Sanji, looking slightly confused on why that was an issue.  Zoro shook his head in disappointment as Sanji CONTINUED to fail to understand the issue that babysitting was SO a girl's thing.

So Sanji threw down a fifty as if it was nothing and they all got up and left Friendly's, the Friendliest place in the world.  You see, everyone with older siblings has been to Friendly's PLENTY of times because whenever they got sad, their older sibling would nudge them and say, "Come on, let's go to Friendly's."

"What should we do now?" asked Nami.  "I mean, since we're at the mall, we might as well hang out for a little while."

"No." said Zoro.  "The mall is not one of those places that we 'might as well hang out' at."

"I bet there's a sale in American Eagle!" Sanji said as he pointed to the clothes store that was across from the Friendly's.  "But we should check Banana Republic first.  They're having a HUGE summer sale and I don't…"

"They have puppies at the pet store!!"  yelled Luffy as he pointed to the pet store that was next to the American Eagle.

"I want to see if they have any Bulldogs!" said Usopp.  "And I also want to check out the video game store!"

"They have some pretty stylish shirts in Aeropostale with bulldogs on them, Usopp." Said Sanji.  "While it may not exactly be good to wear clothes with bulldogs on them, you could definitely use some new clothes."

"I like my clothes…" whined Usopp as he pulled on his suspenders and spun his spinny tie.

"It's been such a long time since I got new clothes." Sighed Nami.

"Me too!" exclaimed Luffy who was, obviously, still wearing the exact same thing he ALWAYS wears.

"Well, let's go to American Eagle then!" said Sanji since he wasn't about to miss out on the great sale they had.

"Yeah!" said Nami since she always jumped at the opportunity to be cool.

"Hurray!" said Luffy since he was happy if his friends were happy.

"Well…all right…" said Usopp since he didn't want to be left out of the loop.

"I'll wait for you guys here." Said Zoro since he couldn't think of anything that would possibly be less fun.  Just as everyone was about to scold him and force him to come, he caught the sight of Smoker peeking at them from behind a plant with a murderous look in his eyes.  "I guess I'll just go with you guys then."

Even though he wasn't afraid of Smoker, he didn't feel like having a confrontation at that moment because he had just eaten and he didn't want to have to deal with cramps.

So, with that, everyone jumped up and punched the air and then Sanji led the way to American Eagle!!


	15. Mobambi

"O~~~h Sa~~~nji!" Nami sang as she picked out a very lovely shirt and frolicked over to Sanji who was shifting through a rack of pants.

"Ye~~~s Nami~~~?" Sanji sang right back.

"Well…this shirt is just so CUTE…" Nami said, looking distressed.  "But, as it turns out, I just can't afford it!"

"Oh, well that's no reason to look so distressed!" Sanji laughed.  "I feel as though it's my duty as your boyfriend to buy you a shirt and lunch here and there!"

Nami paused.  "My…boyfriend?" she said skeptically.

"Yeah!" said Sanji.  "What…you don't approve?"

"…No." said Nami as if it should have been obvious to Sanji.  Well, of course it's obvious to all of us, but most certainly not obvious to Sanji.  So he agreed to buy her the shirt despite the fact that he did not wear the title of 'boyfriend' for he knew that someday he would.

Then Nami skipped off to find a purse that would match her new shirt as Sanji sighed sadly and finally found the pants that were in his size just as Zoro walked over.

"I don't like it in here." He said.

"Why?" asked Sanji because he couldn't be more confused.

"It's not really my place…" Zoro confessed as he turned around just as a few store attendants pretended not to be staring at him or the rebellious angle of his hat.

"Oh." Said Sanji as he did absolutely nothing about it.

"Are you just going to stand there and do absolutely nothing about it?" Zoro asked, sounding angry.

"And what am I supposed to do about it?" Sanji said since it made sense and all.

"I don't know…"

"Just leave if you don't like it here." Sanji said.  "I don't like you here either.  We'll meet you right outside the store."

"Fine, I'll do just that." Said Zoro as he turned and left, feeling as though he had another victory under his belt.  Of course, Sanji felt the same way too and added yet another tally mark to his winning sheet.  I guess it's for the best when both of them walk away thinking they've won because then it puts a stop to arguments, unless they argue about who actually won, but that would just be silly.

So Zoro strolled nonchalantly out of the store only to ALMOST crash into someone he knew.  It was Tashigi, the junior who thought he was a junior and didn't know that he was a FRESHMAN!!

"Hi." Said Zoro.

"Don't 'hi' me!!" yelled Tashigi.

"…What?" Zoro asked.

"Why didn't you tell me that you were a freshman?!" demanded Tashigi.

Zoro scratched the back of his head and was secretly disappointed, though half cheered on the inside that she needed to be TOLD that he was a freshman and couldn't tell simply by looking at him.

"I don't know." He said finally.

"You told me you were a junior!" whined Tashigi.

"No I didn't." Zoro pointed out.  "You were the one who just ASSUMED I was."

"Be quiet you FRESHMAN!" yelled Tashigi as she pointed dramatically at Zoro with quite the psychopathic expression.  "I challenge you to a racquetball rematch!!"

Zoro looked around to remind himself that he was in a mall, not at the gym anymore.  "Now?" he asked.

"Yes, NOW!" said Tashigi as she whipped out two racquets and a ball.

Meanwhile, Nami was trying on all sorts of clothes of varying styles and colors to see which one she looked the best in!  As she emerged from the changing room, arms full with clothes, she went on a mad search for Sanji only to find someone ELSE!

It was a boy about her age, and you can always tell with boys because there is a FINE line between middle school boys and high school boys.  He had a scar running down the side of his face and was wearing extremely stylish purple tinted sunglasses.

"Oh, HI!" said Nami as if she knew him.

"Um…hi." Said the boy.

"Hey, how come I've never really seen you around at school before?" said Nami as she twirled her hair around her finger and shifted her weight back and forth in a really shameless manner.

"Oh." Said the kid.  "I go to a private school."

"A private school?" Nami said in a fashion that would suggest that the kid had told a hilarious joke that would require her laughter.

"Why is that funny?" he said, sounding a little offended.  "Is there something wrong with private schools?"

"Oh, no!" said Nami, realizing that her plan kind of backfired on her.  "It's just that…well, I know someone who used to go to a private school too!"

"Used to?" said the kid with a raised eyebrow.  "So you're saying that he USED to go a private school but now he goes to a public school?  Can you even do that?"

"Yeah," continued Nami.  "And he's really cool and popular and I'm really good friends with him and he's in high school."

"Well that settles it then." Said the kid.  "If I had any doubts of your coolness prior to when you just said that, they're all gone now."

Just then, Sanji wandered over.  "Speak of the devil, here he is!" said Nami, pointing to Sanji.

"Hello, I'm Sanji." Said Sanji instinctively.

"Hi." Said the random kid who remains nameless.

"Sanji, I was just telling this nice boy here that you used to go to a private school because he said that _he _goes to one too!" Nami said, trying WAY to hard to make small talk.

"Ah yes." Said Sanji.  "I went to a private school.  But not anymore.  I don't like to talk about it."

"That's weird because I don't recognize you." Said the kid.  

"Well, I AM a year older than you." Said Sanji as if that just made him SO much better.  He knew that this random kid was only middle school criteria because, as we have stated previously, it is very easy to tell between a boy who is in middle school and a boy who is in high school.

"It's not like it's a big school." Said the kid.  "I know practically everyone in the school.  And I most certainly do not remember anyone named 'Sanji' at my school."

"Well whose to say I went to YOUR private school?" said Sanji.

The kid only shrugged.

"Anyway," said Nami as she put her hand out.  "I'm Nami."

"I'm Kohza." Said the kid but he didn't really take her hand or anything.  He just kind of stood there foolishly.

"Do you want to hang out or something?" asked Nami, taking the initiative.

"Um…I'm waiting for someone." Said Kohza, pointing at the girls changing room.

"Besides, Nami, WE'RE hanging out!" said Sanji, looking hurt.

"Oh…so you already have a girlfriend…?" Nami asked.

"No." said Kohza.  "Wait, yes.  Actually…no…I dunno…"

"You don't know?" Nami said with a raised eyebrow.

Just then, the door to the changing room swung open and a younger girl with blue hair came frolicking out.  "I'm done!!" she said, handing a stack of folded clothing to the changing room attendant who was wearing a crown on his orange hair and had nines tattooed on his face.  "Nothing really fit."

Then she skipped over to Kohza, Nami and Sanji.  "I didn't find anything I liked!" she said mildly sadly.

In a far off distant land, a young boy named Mobambi fell off a cliff and tumbled to his doom.  He didn't die on impact, however, he only broke both his legs and lied there calling for help.  When no one came, he had to scale the mountain with his bare hands and no legs.  About three quarters of the way up, he fell again, except he fell on his arms this time so he had to scale the mountain once again with his teeth.  However, he fell again and broke his spine so there would be no more climbing for Mobambi.  He lied there until he eventually starved to death, only after it snowed a little bit…actually, it snowed a lot.  And then some rabid animals came out of nowhere and ate all of his appendages (yes, even THAT one) and gave him rabies.  So the frozen rabid torso of Mobambi eventually died.  It was very sad, and very slow, and VERY painful.

"Well, I guess we'll just have to leave then." Said Kohza.

"No!" said Nami.  "You don't have to!  I'll help you find some clothes!  I'm really good at that sort of stuff!  And then, while she's trying them on, we can talk some more, okay?"

Kohza shrugged.  "Whatever." He said.

Then Nami grabbed the blue haired girl and dragged her off to find some wonderful clothes, leaving Sanji and Kohza to only stand there like fools for a few minutes.

"So…just because I'm curious…what private school do you go to?" asked Sanji suddenly.

"Alabasta." Kohza replied.

"Oh." Said Sanji.  "You go to THAT school.  _I _went to Baratie."

"You guys suck at…everything." Said Kohza.

"The only thing you rivaled us at was sports!" Sanji defended.

"And that's…everything." Kohza said.

"No it's not." Sanji replied.

"Come on, we always pulverize you guys as if you've never played a sports game in your lives." Kohza said.

"That's because we don't." Sanji said.  "We would always just throw together a bunch of people who were willing to play you guys whenever you just randomly showed up in a bus."

"Randomly?!  Those were scheduled events!"

"Well _I _didn't get a schedule."

"So if you guys never did anything with sports, what did you do?"

"We learned important life skills like cooking and cleaning and math!  Sports are only for people who are too stupid to excel in school and have to rely on their athletic abilities to get them into a good college."

Suddenly, "Sanji, did you take my hat because now I'm missing it and everyone can see my horrible green hair." Said Zoro as he came walking over to where Sanji was standing.  Then he looked at Kohza briefly and decided to just disregard him entirely.  "You need to buy me a new one because I've looked everywhere."

"Zoro is a prime example of my argument!" said Sanji to Kohza.  "You see, he will get into a good college because he plays many sports, and he plays them well too.  He won't be getting into college because of his effort in his studies, you can trust me there, but just because he plays sports well, he will excel!"

"Damn right!" said Zoro.

"I don't know, some people can play sports AND have brains too." Said Kohza.

"Oh?" said Sanji.  "Like who?"

"Like…me?" said Kohza.

"Wait…who are you?" Zoro asked, pointing at Kohza.

"Kohza." Kohza replied.

"Oh, well that clears everything up." Said Zoro.

"I go to a private school, Alabasta, and I was just talking to your friend about how my school is better in every way."

"Which is so not true." Said Sanji.

"So yours taught you how to read?" Zoro asked.

"Of course." Said Kohza.

Zoro paused.  "…What grade?" he said finally.

"7th." Said Kohza.  "Just like all the OTHER private schools."

"I see." Said Zoro, barely suppressing the urge to ask Kohza and Sanji to work collaboratively to read a label on a shirt.

Just then, Luffy and Usopp came bouncing over.  "We found SO much stuff that we want to try on!" said Luffy.

"Why are you trying anything on?" asked Sanji.  "I thought you said that you didn't have any money."

"I thought YOU were going to pay for us!" said Usopp.

Sanji gave a heavy sigh.  "No!" he said.  "I was only making the suggestion that you get new clothes for future reference!"

"But…we just want to be cool too…" said Luffy as he bowed his head in shame.

"Then come back some other time to buy the clothes." Said Sanji.

Luffy and Usopp looked at each other.  "I still want to try them on." Said Usopp truthfully.

"Yeah!" said Luffy.  "Me too!"  With that, they ran into the changing rooms.

There was a short silent period.

"Zoro, I thought you said you didn't want to be in here anymore." Said Sanji just as that thought occurred to him.  Zoro didn't know how to respond to that because he didn't remember saying such a thing, but then he remembered that he actually DID say that and then he had stormed out.

"Well, I didn't." he began.  "So I went outside and there was this girl from the gym that I had beaten in racquetball and she was mad because she thought I was a junior and I guess she didn't like having to lose to a freshmen so she came up to me and demanded that I play racquetball with her right then and there in the mall."

It was silent again.

"Then what happened?" asked Kohza.

"I distracted her and was ABOUT to run into the sports store but girls are smart so I knew that was the first place she'd look.  So I ran in here.  Then I realized that I lost my hat.  I assume it came off while I was blindly tearing through large crowds to escape the embarrassment of being associated with someone who needed to play racquetball with me in the middle of the mall.  So you need to buy me one because I don't have another one."

"What did I JUST tell Luffy and Usopp?" Sanji said.

"That you wouldn't buy any clothes for them?" Zoro suggested.

"Right." Said Sanji.  "So what does that mean?"

"You won't buy any clothes for Luffy and Usopp?" Zoro tried.

"Which also means that I will be buying absolutely nothing for you either." Said Sanji.

"But I don't have one at home and I don't have any money." Zoro said.

"Then get a job."

"But I need the hat NOW."

Meanwhile, Nami was walking around with her new acquaintance and decided to start some conversation and find out a little bit more about her 'relationship' with Kohza!!

"What's your name, anyway?" Nami asked.  "I'm Nami."

"My name's Vivi!" said the girl.

"So…how old are you?" she continued, trying to keep the questions innocent at first.

"I'm eleven!" Vivi replied.

"That means you're going into middle school this year, right?" asked Nami.

"No, I go to a private school with Kohza so we just have one big school." Vivi answered.

"Well that's interesting!" said Nami and knew that since they had mentioned Kohza's name, it was time to revert back to him.  "Do you…have any sort of relationship with Kohza whatsoever?"

"Huh?" said Vivi.  "Like what?  What do you mean?"

"Like…are you two going out?" Nami spelled out for her.  Though it wouldn't really help if it was spelled out considering the kids at Alabasta don't learn how to read either.  Hahahaha.

"You mean like…are we boyfriend and girlfriend?" Vivi asked.

"Yes." Nami said with a nod.

"No, I don't think so." Said Vivi.  "Actually…maybe we are.  Then again… well, I guess I don't really know.  Our dads are best friends though."

"Oh." Said Nami.  "Well, you're too young for him anyway, don't you think?"

Vivi shrugged.  "I don't know."

Nami looked down to see that they were both holding lots of clothes so they decided to make their way back to the changing room where Sanji and Kohza were!

"All right!" said Nami as she pushed Vivi into one of the stalls and then turned around to face Kohza.  "I found her a LOT of cool clothes."

"Cool." Said Kohza.

There was silence for a minute.

"Zoro, are you done in there?!" demanded Sanji randomly as he started violently pounding on the door to one of the stalls.

"GIVE ME A MINUTE!!!" Zoro yelled back.

There was another silence.

"Wait…Zoro's in there?" Nami said finally because she was still trying to sort out what just happened.

"Yeah." Sanji replied.

"Zoro is trying on clothes from American Eagle?" Nami continued.

"Yeah." Sanji said AS IF IT WAS NORMAL!!!

"…Why?" Nami asked.

"Because he wanted me to buy him a hat and I told him I would only do so if he tried on the most flamboyant outfit I could find for him!" Sanji answered.

"I found it." said Kohza.

"Yes, HE found it." Sanji corrected.

"Then this is something I definitely have to see." Nami decided.  "Until then, how about we talk a little bit more?"

"I would LOVE that, Nami!" said Sanji.

"Not YOU." Said Nami and then she pointed at Kohza.  "HIM.  Did you have any idea that I am officially the most popular girl in my school as of right now?"

"That's cool." Said Kohza.

"Isn't it just?" Nami replied, batting her eyes in a very flirtatious manner.

Just then, the door swung open.  Unfortunately for everyone, it was Vivi's door and she was dressed in some of the clothes that Nami had helped pick out for her.  "How do I look?!" she said, modeling for them.

"Great, why don't you try on some other clothes?" Nami asked as she hastily attempted to shove Vivi back into the stall.

Kohza looked at his watch.  "It's actually almost time for us to go."

"Go?!" Nami gasped.  "Go where?!  What could you possibly have to do on the first day of summer vacation?!"

"Summer vacation?" said Kohza with a raised eyebrow.  "Oh right.  Public schools do that.  Well, at Alabasta, we don't have summer vacation.  We work through the summer."

"We did that at Baratie too." Said Sanji as if that sort of thing was common.

"No summer vacation?" Usopp gasped as he ran out of the changing room.

"That's terrible!" said Luffy.  "And unfair!"

"But there are only half days in the summer." Kohza explained.  "We start at nine and go till noon."

"And yet they STILL don't teach you how to read?" came Zoro's voice from inside the stall.

"All right, I'm tired of hearing that!" yelled Sanji as Nami, Usopp and Luffy all let out loud groans.

"Hearing what?" asked Kohza.

"He just thinks it's the most hilarious thing in the world!" Sanji said angrily as smoke puffed out of his ears.

"What is?" Kohza persisted.

"He thinks it's funny that our private schools don't teach us how to read until we're in seventh grade." Sanji said, crossing his arms.  Kohza pondered for a minute, unable to see what was strange or amusing about that.  So Sanji cleared his throat.  "In public schools, students learn how to read when they were in kindergarten."

"Isn't that a little young?" said Kohza.

"Good GOD, Sanji!" yelled Zoro, opening the door to the stall and walking out in his regular clothes.  He tossed the outfit that Kohza had picked out for him at Sanji.  "I have just been LOOKING at those clothes all this time and their mere presence offend me so I highly doubt I'll be able to WEAR it!  NOTHING is worth that sort of humiliation!"

"Not even a hat?" Sanji tried.

"No." Zoro said.

"Come on, you're telling me that you went into a changing room with nice clothes and then DIDN'T try them on, even if you just wanted to see what you looked like in them?!" Usopp demanded.

Zoro looked at Usopp as if he was stupid.  His glare was answer enough.

"Well, I have some homework to do so I have to go." Said Kohza as Vivi exited the changing room in her regular clothes.

"Just tell me this…" Zoro said.  "It's a reasonable question.  What sort of homework could you POSSIBLY do if you can't read?  Just curious."

Kohza decided not to dignify that with an answer and just grab Vivi and run.

"So, Nami, you're not going to pursue him as a male friend?" Luffy asked.

"Naw." Said Nami as she watched him go.  "After all, he has school over the summer vacation so that means he won't be spending all his time with me at the beach where we can watch the sunset.  Besides, I only like OLDER guys."

"I have the summer off, Nami." Said Sanji.  "And I love sunsets.  And I'm older."

"Yeah, well, so is Zoro." Said Nami.

"I don't love sunsets." Said Zoro.

"I love sunsets." Sanji repeated.

"Well, I guess I don't love sunsets all THAT much." Nami decided.

"But Nami, a minute ago you said you loved them!" whined Sanji.  "I just can't win with you, can I?!"

"No." Nami answered truthfully.


	16. The End!

After all staring at each other for another moment or so, they decided that it was now time to LEAVE the mall!  So, after boarding the bus and then getting home, they realized that it was NOW FIVE O'CLOCK!!  GOLLY GEE WHIZ HOW _LONG _DID THEY SPEND IN AMERICAN EAGLE?!?!?!

"Hey guys, can we make a lemonade stand NOW?" whined Luffy.

"Luffy, you have all summer to make a lemonade stand." Said Nami.

"But I want to make one today!" Luffy complained.

"You want to make one all year round." Zoro pointed out.

"I just don't know what I'm going to do with all this free time this summer!" Sanji exclaimed out of nowhere.  "I mean, it's like a two and a half month long weekend!  But you know?  I want to go back to school!"

"Why?" said everyone.

"Because." said Sanji, looking confused as to why they were asking him such a silly question.  "It's All School.I want to go to All School."

"Oh." Said Zoro.  "I thought you were going to say that it was because you wanted to learn more."

"_I _want to learn more!" said Usopp.

"Well, I thought you were going to say that you thought I was going to say that it was because I wanted to learn how to read." Sanji said.

"I thought you'd say that." Said Zoro.

"And I thought you'd say that too." Sanji replied.

"No, you thought I'd say that I think you should think about learning to read."

"How do you know what I was thinking?"

"I can tell just by the way you say things."

"So you know what I'm thinking just by the things I say?"

"That's not what I said."

"I thought you said that you could tell what I was thinking just by what I said."

"You thought wrong."

"Can't you tell?  After all, you said that you can tell what I think just by what I say.  I would THINK that you would be able to say what I'm thinking just by listening to the things I say."

"AHHH!!" yelled Luffy.  "I'M GETTING CONFUSED!!!"

"I was confused a LONG time ago!" said Usopp.

"I've learned to block them out." Nami sighed.

"Block me out, Nami?!" said Sanji as if this was news to him.  "Why would you do such a thing?!"

"I'm not even going to dignify that with an answer." Nami said, rolling her eyes.

"Technically, Nami, that was an answer." Said Usopp.

"Shut up, Usopp." Said Nami.

"Whose house should we go over to tonight?" asked Luffy.  "We can't go over mine because Ace is having an end of the year party and he told me not to come home until tomorrow morning or he'd never take me to Friendly's again."

"Well, you can go over Usopp's house." Said Zoro.

"YEAH!!" said Usopp.  "You can come over MY house!!"

"YEAH!!" Luffy said excitedly as the two grabbed hands and swung each other around in circles.

"Now that you two are going to hang out, does everyone else except for Zoro want to come to MY house?" Sanji requested.

"No, Sanji." Said Nami.

"I am offended." Said Zoro, and he probably was.

"It would just be CASUAL!" said Sanji.  "I would offer to do homework with you but it's the summer and we don't HAVE homework!"

"Very good." Said Zoro.

"Leave me alone." Said Sanji, giving Zoro an evil eye.

"How about we ALL go over to my house?!" Usopp asked as he and Luffy finished swinging each other around.

"Um." said everyone else, avoiding eye contact.  It was one thing to go over Luffy's house, but going over Usopp's house was a whole 'nother story.

"I'm sure you and Luffy will have a SUPER fun time alone!" said Nami, giving Usopp the thumbs up.

"That's right!" said Sanji, joining in.  "You don't need US to spoil your fun!"

"That is so kind of you!" said Luffy, his eyes welding up with tears.

"So hurry!" said Zoro, trying to push them away.  "To Usopp's house!"

"But we can ALL walk back to our houses together!" Usopp tried to argue.  "After all, we all live reasonably close, right?"

"Oh very well." said the three older people.

They started walking and pretty soon came across Usopp's house.

"We'll see you guys tomorrow!!" said Luffy as he and Usopp ran off to his little cottage thing.

"I don't expect to hear rocks being thrown against my window early tomorrow morning!" Zoro called after him.

"Early?" said Nami skeptically.

They kept walking and walking and walking.  Actually, it wasn't all that far to Nami's house.

"All right you guys, don't kill each other on your way home!" Nami said.

"Oh Nami, you're concerned for my welfare?!" Sanji said happily.

"Well, I most certainly wouldn't like to see you dead." Said Nami.  "Mortally wounded, perhaps.  But not dead.  As long as it was something you could recover from."

Nami figured that she put Sanji in enough shock so that she could sprint into her house and slam the door before he could intelligently react.  Zoro walked up to Sanji and waved his hand in front of his face.

"Oh Nami, why must you be so cold?" Sanji pined.

"I am SO thankful that my house is just a few houses from now." Zoro said as he quickly started walking.

"Hey, so am I supposed to walk home all by myself?!" Sanji demanded as he hurried after Zoro.

"Yeah." Said Zoro.  "So?"

"I don't find that very fair that everyone else had someone to walk with but not me." Sanji said.  "And it's not like I live near you or anything.  It's a fair distance from my house to yours."

"Thank GOD." Said Zoro.

"Hmph." Said Sanji.  "Now I think I WANT to walk alone."

"What's stopping you?" Zoro asked.

"Your presence." Sanji replied.

"Well aren't you lucky then?" said Zoro.  "Here's my house."

"Good riddance." Said Sanji, thinking he was winning when, in reality, he really just sounded like a fool.

So, without exchanging another word, Zoro walked into his house and shut the door behind him, leaving Sanji AAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLL alone!

Sanji had to walk past the raging party at Luffy's house and then he finally got to his OWN house.  Uh.yeah.  That's pretty much it.  He didn't do any talking to himself and he most certainly didn't get kidnapped.  He just reflected on what it was going to be like to have an entire summer off and then go to All School.

Meanwhile, at Usopp's house, those two crazy future seventh graders were party-heartying!  First, they made Kool-Aid.  Then they went outside and tried to sell some lemonade but that didn't really work since it was already dark outside.  Then, since they were already outside and all, they decided to look for bugs and then put them in Usopp's collection.  Then they ran back inside to eat a meal or two.  Then they spread out their sleeping bags.  Then they went to sleep.

Nami entered her house and picked up the phone.  She started talking to one of her friends and then went on the three-way phone so she could talk to another one of her friends.  Then each of her two friends went on three-way phone so they were talking to.er. a bunch of people.  Then, all THOSE people went on three way phone and pretty soon, Nami was talking with some people she didn't even know!  But she didn't care because they were guys and they sounded older and maybe she could potentially use them to up her popularity.  However, it's not like her popularity could have been upped anymore because she was the most popular girl in school!!  HAHA!!  But she could always get a head start on being the most popular freshman in the high school for next year.

Zoro walked into his house, walked up the stairs, walked over to his bed, lied down, and went to sleep.

Sanji, on the other hand, frolicked about in his house for a while, happy that he had an entire summer to spend with Nami but also sad because there would be an entire summer until he got to go to All School.  There was a downside to All School, though, and that was that he would have to wait an ENTIRE YEAR before Nami joined him there!  To get his mind off sad things, he decided to cook himself a grand meal and spent hours and hours making himself all sorts of elaborate things!  Of course, what took the most time was reading those gosh darned labels!!

The adventures of the five friends throughout the summer will go on FOREVER in our hearts.  But will not be written on this paper.  Instead, we'll just jump forward three years.

**Yeah so.that's the end.  As a completely random side note, I think the most difficult part of this story was not mentioning or referring to any sort of parental figures since a few of them have unexplained families or we just didn't watch the episodes that center around a particular character's family life.  (COUGH NAMI COUGH)**


End file.
